Blondie disappoints again and someone new to fill the void?

My dear sexy readers, you may be happy to hear that I am meeting someone new today!!! He's a musician, and we have about 30 mutual Facebook friends. We met on Tinder LOL but I'm sure our paths would've crossed in a bar or stage eventually!

 We've been talking to now for about oh maybe 6 months, but my initial attraction waned quickly with every political post he'd made. A staunch conservative, we began arguing publicly and it really almost got ugly. We couldn't be more opposite, and as the election got closer, and of course, when his candidate won, he gloated and I realized I could never date him.

And I really can't remember what the turning point was for me--most likely, it was his persistence. Combined with a lack of persistence on Blondie's part, he just kind of got under my skin. He made himself impossible to ignore.

And he wasn't kidding when he told me he is blunt. He has challenged me and said things to me no guy has ever said. And he calls me every day! Blondie has called me, but every day?? And this guy isn't a schmoozer. It's like he's got an ego as big as mine, and he is tough. He doesn't lay on the compliments easily, it's like I have to work for them, and apparently, I like the challenge as well! It was interesting to find out he's an Aquarian like me! He said he'd never met another Aquarian. I've only met one, and that was in high school. So we must be rare and strange creatures indeed.

I'm not sure I'm physically attracted to him which is the problem. In some pics he's hot and in some he's not. He's 27 (going to be 28) and what I DO like is he is all in. He's a great communicator. Not like Blondie. He actually told me, "I'm not so sure about you. I feel like this is one-sided, and I'm just here to entertain you." WOW WHAT???!!!!! I couldn't even answer. He went on, "I write you and write you and send you snapchats and you look at them and don't send anything back." And guess what---this is what Blondie does to ME!!!!!! And I'm so frustrated with him, and here I'm doing that to someone else???!!! I was like "whoa!!"!!

I confessed to him that I have someone else. That things aren't going as well as I'd like but that I'm pretty attached to him, so I'm sorry when I'm flaky, it's because I'm either crazy busy with my life (not an excuse he said) or talking to him. He thanked me for telling him, but he challenged me further to explore what I want from HIM and if I've got room in my life for him.

And I realize that he's everything I've been looking for, which is mainly, a great communicator. I feel shallow and hollow talking to him and I feel like I've met myself. Have you ever met anyone that made you feel that way?? I feel like if I let him in, TRULY let him in, I will fall harder than I've ever fallen for anyone, and he will either break me in two or make me the best person I could ever be. Or break me making me that person. I realize right now, writing about him, that I'm terrified. I can't wait to tell him.

After days of arguing about how we will meet, I agreed I'd meet him at his apartment, but I wouldn't go in. I am merely picking him up and we are going to walk to a nearby restaurant for lunch. Why did we argue about where to meet you may ask?? Well, I'm a girl (DUH) and wanted to meet him in a public place, and he thought it was silly. So we argued about that. He was just like, "REALLY?!??! We've been talking for half a year and you think I'm a serial killer?" He was insulted. I stood my ground. I said, "You're a stranger. I don't care how long I've been talking to you. I don't know you."
He got it, but then I said the real truth--"it's not that I really think you might hurt me, although that is a real possibility. The truth is, what if I'm not attracted to you? What if we have no chemistry? I don't want to be stuck at your apartment trying to get away. I want to be able to leave when and if I want to leave." He softened and said with all his bravado, "well, that ain't gonna happen because we already have crazy chemistry." I laughed and said, "we'll see mister."

I guess I need a name for him, because I think you'll be hearing a lot about him, but I will wait until after we meet.

****************

I am leaning towards this guy primarily because Blondie is just driving me crazy with his hot and cold, and after yesterday, I feel like I am ready to scream at him. And I don't want to scream at him, because of course I don't want to do anything to push him away, but when I see the lack of communication from him and that insane command of communication from this new guy, it just makes me limp with exhaustion. Yesterday was a prime example.

Sunday night, yet again, Blondie messages me around 10 o'clock a "happy birthday" (it's actually not till Thursday) and that he's sorry he couldn't "cum" (sic) to the party my friends threw for me that day. So that led to, "I'm alone, you should come over." I said, "I can't tonight, sorry" as I was drunk and trying to sober up, in my jammies drinking Sprite on the couch. (the party was epic BTW). Then as quickly as he asked me over, he says, "oh my roommate home now, I was alone." I didn't respond. Then I just wrote something like, 'Oh Blondie, you know how badly I want to fuck you. Come over tmrw at 11:00 (am)". He said, "I will be there."

And then he wrote he was going to Urgent Care in the morning and would come by after. I said, "Urgent care???! OMG why??!!" Seemed a strange pairing. ER visit and hot sex. Hmm. Okayyy?!?! He said he has a hernia and has to see the dr. No further explanation. So I said, "Ok, well sorry to hear but yeah! I'll be here! Can't wait to see you!"

I had told him I had tennis until 10:30 but that I'd be home and showered by 11-ish. And when I'd finished tennis and hadn't yet heard from him, I knew he wasn't going to end up coming over. I just knew it. I didn't want to be the first one to write him, but I needed to know if he was coming over or not, because if he wasn't, I wouldn't shower, I'd get my house cleaned and shit. So I just wrote, "Just finished tennis. How'd it go at the doctor?" He wrote right back, "I go at 12;30." 

I wish I'd waited to respond or not respond at all. I processed this new info and my mind just quickly surmised it to mean, "I won't be able to see you now." Of course he didn't actually SAY that. I had to figure it out on my own. So stupidly and too quickly, giving him the benefit of the doubt, I just said. "that's good! Gotta take care of yourself" and then, "well poopy you won't get to see me then."

And when I told my BFF about this convo, she was furious. She said, "That's it??!! He never responded??" I said, "nope". And he still hasn't. She said, 'You can't make appointments at the urgent care. He could've gone a different time." So then I started to stew, and smoke began to come out of my ears, and I began to feel furious and stupid.

And unappreciated, and taken for granted, because without more information, why would I feel any differently?? How hard would it have been to say, "I'm sorry, that's the only time they could get me in, it sucks!! When are you free next??" And since that STILL hasn't happened, I've decided not to invest any more energy into him. If he wants me, he's going to have to do better.

If I'd waited to respond, and had taken time to process his answer, I would've called him on it. I would've said something more along the lines of, "hmmm that's interesting bc I'm pretty sure Urgent Care doesn't make appointments." And made him defend himself. He's just too much work.

I'm getting really excited to meet this new guy today. Apprehensive and excited at the same time.

Today may be, as Dr. Phil says, "a changing day" for me.

Foreplay is my forte!

The boys on Tinder in LA are just hotter than here where I live.....I shouldn't say that but it's true. All that fresh air and sunshine....mmmmm....so it should come as no surprise that no sooner had I landed then I was on the dating site looking for a hottie to play with. It didn't take me long to find some cuties; I narrowed it down to three and chatted back and forth over a couple days to see who would actually show up at my hotel room. The cutest one I'll call Felipe (he's not even Hispanic so don't get your panties in a wad thinking he's your guy ladies) and we exchanged phone numbers. By Sunday he was sending me shirtless pics and yes, nudies. He was GORGEOUS. 26 years old, clearly works out, ripped abs but not overly muscle-y. Very handsome too. A definite 9. Brown eyes, brown hair, a little hair on his lower stomach which super turns me on.

We teased each other back and forth with pics and sexting, but I know it usually ends there. He had wanted me to come to his apartment during the day but I was busy seeing family, but I was going to be alone in the hotel that night so I was letting him know I wanted him that night instead. He was begging me to "come over now, I have a big hard dick waiting for you" but I wasn't available. Besides, isn't the teasing the best part??? The part where they want me SO bad they are putty in my hands.

The evening rolled along and he was still interested. We agreed 9 o'clock would work, he'd just come straight to my hotel room. He was super excited and horny, and I admit, so was I.

I had had dinner with my hubby, and two glasses of wine later (three for him) we were snuggling at the bar. He always gets so excited when I have a date! He had to leave me there to drive 3 hours where he had meetings the next morning, so it was a perfect opportunity for me to have a little fun. He kissed me and left, and I went to my room to freshen up for my new lover.

I put on some sexy music and ordered two vodka sprites for us, and showered and got ready. I had packed some sexy lingerie just for this moment, and tried on a few different ones and sent selfies to my hubby and asked him what I should wear for my young stud. I wore the one he chose (I do as I'm told). He also told me to wear my stilettos for him too.

We said our goodnights and "I love you"'s and hung up. I had an amazing view of the LAX airport, and grabbed my drink and a chair. I put up my feet and watched the planes taking off and landing and waited for my lover to arrive. The last thing he wrote before I sat down was, "See you soon babe!"

Then came this: "God my car won't start!"

I was like, "yep, stood up again." These guys get scared. Another wasted night alone in a hotel room.

He said he'd call Uber. Then he said he couldn't afford it. Then he asked me if I'd be willing to pay one way. I stopped writing him. Fuck that. I'm not paying anything. I am giving myself to you. I'm not a whore. I'm a slut! There's a difference!!

When he realized I stopped responding, he said, "I'll take that as a no hahaha", then, "hey enjoy the pics wish it happened. Safe travels tmrw." It seemed he might've actually been telling the truth. I responded, "Me too. thank u." He said, "If you're ever in the area hit me up" to which I didn't respond, but thought to myself, "yeah, so you can stand me up yet again!!!!"

Then he wrote, "Actually fuck it I'm coming be there in 20"

YAY!!!!!!!! THAT'S THE CORRECT RESPONSE!!!

I said, "you are?" And he responded, "yeah maybe 30 because I have to wait for this uber." I said, "I'm glad you changed your mind" and sent him a selfie to reward him. He loved it. He said, "Get ready baby, I'm on my way."

I did a little happy dance and texted my hubby the date was back on. He said he already had a huge hard on and couldn't wait. Could I leave my phone on secretly so he could hear?? I said I would do that for him.

He didn't get there till 10:40, but he did show up. I had told him to send me a quick text when he got to the hotel, but he didn't! All of a sudden I heard a knock at my door!!! It was him!!!

I said, "who is it?" and he said, "It's me!" I opened the door and there he was, all 5-9 inch, twenty-six years old full of smoldering testosterone. He was GORGEOUS! As good looking as his pics! I let him in and we were both smiling! He kissed me right away and I said I thought he was going to text me when he got here and he said he was so excited he forgot! LOL 

He kicked off his shoes (black and white Converse) and I took him by the hand and led him over to the bed. He quickly took off his shirt and there were those amazing abs...just inches away from my face. I put my hands on them and pulled him close so I could smell him. Mmm I love the way men smell!! It wasn't like full-on cologne scent, it was just "manly" LOL as silly as that sounds. I gave him butterfly kisses and caressed his torso, he was just so delicious. 

My favorite part is the unzipping of the fly and getting to see the hard cock for the first time. I love this part!!! He started to do it himself and I gently took over for him. I love the unbuckling, I love the unzipping, and I love the feeling a guy must get at this point. The anticipation is the best part! It's better than Christmas! It's a gift I love to give myself. 

Once opened, I gently pulled his jeans down and allowed him to step out of them. Standing in front of me is one of the most beautiful bodies I've ever laid eyes on, and he's all mine. Also discovering what kind of boxers/undies they wear is another favorite of mine. He had on the stretchy kind that hugs his package, and it was apparent I had gotten him all worked up! I loved rubbing his hard cock while it was still inside. Like I said, the anticipation is my favorite. Foreplay is my forte! I put my mouth on that huge bulge and nibbled it till he couldn't stand it another second. I grabbed his ass and squeezed it hard. What a nice tight ass he had!  He was running his hands through my hair gently and then grasped my head to lift me up to his mouth. He kissed me hard and sensuously, his tongue so hungry. It was juicy and so delicious. I love being kissed!!!!!

He lifted me and put my on the edge of the bed, and pulled out his big hard dick. Mmmm I put my mouth around it and started sucking it just like I'd texted him I would. He then pushed me gently onto my back and hovered over me, that big dick bouncing up and down in my face. I giggled and took it in my mouth and kept sucking it. 

I pulled off and said, "come lay down", and he did. I got on top of him, took a big long drink of that sexy man laying there in my bed, and took a mental picture. He was happy and smiling, his hands leisurely behind his head, just splayed out for my pleasure. This is where I feel like a kid in a candy store, I just can't decided what I want to do first! Suck him? Lick him? Fuck him? Reverse cowgirl or just climb on top? I decided to straddle him and continue the BJ I'd promised him. He was DELICIOUS. He moaned and stiffened and grabbed my hair and writhed in delight. It wasn't five minutes when I tasted his pre-cum and I always let a guy know I've tasted it. He loved it. 

It was the quietest orgasm I'd ever given anyone! He came in my mouth and I swallowed it all completely seamless. It just went down so easily and I never had the gag response like I've gotten with other guys. It was like, "SHIT HE JUST CAME!! HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN???"

And as pleased as he was, he was done!

He pulled me down next to him, and he cuddled me. He said, "give me five minutes, I'll be ready to go again." I said, "no worries! You can play with ME!" and coyly took his hand off his dick, which he was slapping around to get it hard again, and put it on my very wet and excited pussy. He fingered me for a little bit and just as I was ready to come he stopped and went back to slapping his dick again and I said, "I'll make you excited again by making me come" but he seemed so focused on his floppy dick. Then he said he had to go to the  bathroom, so he got up and went (I was hoping he'd leave the door open....and I contemplated following him in....but I chickened out and he closed the door....

He came back to bed but he was done. He was very sweet and kept apologized but the truth was, I didn't care that his dick wasn't getting hard! There was a lot he could do that had nothing to do with his limp penis! I asked him if he'd go down on me and he said, "sorry I don't do that" and I was like, "oh....okayyy...." and was really disappointed. He was sweet and shy, he was embarrassed about his limp dick and really didn't get that I didn't care. I wanted him to touch me and please me, but he didn't have a clue even though I was doing my best to communicate what I wanted him to do. I couldn't convince him sadly, and he looked at his phone and said his cab was there.

He started to get dressed, and I picked up my purple satin robe and put it on. He sat down on the bed to put his shoes on, and I told him I loved his Converse shoes and told him I collected them. He said he did too, and we chatted about them for a little bit. Then he took my face in his hands and kissed me and thanked me for a great time, and that he'd love to see me again next time I'm in LA. I said I would definitely call him. We walked to the door, he kissed me hard again, and smiling, left. I watched his sexy ass walk away and closed the door. Then suddenly I heard a knock, and it was him again! He said, "I left my phone!" and we laughed and he went over to the bed, grabbed it, and kissed me again on the way out. And again, I watched his sexy ass walk away out into the hall, smiled to myself, and closed the door.

I took out my contacts, and called my hubby and told him how the night went. He was three hours away in another hotel room and he was still as horny as I was. We masturbated to each other and it was super hot. We pleased ourselves as we pleased each other and said our "I love you's" and goodbyes.

Laying there in the dark, feeling quite dreamy, and texted Felipe, "Thanks for coming (pink heart emoticon) you're very sweet and sexy" He wrote back immediately, "Thank you! I had a blast!" That was awesome.

I slept very well that night.

               

Our secret sex lives

Hey! A huge THANK YOU to all you sexy people who took the time to answer my Survey Monkey survey! It is SOOO fun reading everyone's responses. I'm humbled by the sheer number of responses as well as the answers to everyone's favorite sexual position--Doggy-style by a mile!!! Call me old-fashioned but I'm wondering if more guys are taking my survey than the ladies...?? I can't speak for anyone but myself but honestly, doggy-style in my opinion is more sexy for the guys. I personally like a sexual position where we are locking eyes, such as MY personal favorite, GIRL ON TOP!! (which came in second BTW...) Yes.......girl on top. MMMMM....oh sorry!!! I got sidetracked there for a second.....fantasizing.....

Sex is such a fun and secretive topic, and what's interesting also is how many of you aren't living in fear of being discovered for your kinky lifestyle. Maybe many of you don't have children like we do, or maybe you are just one of those free spirits that let's it all hang out. I envy you. I have realized that if we had started our marriage open and raised our kids openly and honestly from day one it would've been better. There's nothing more disturbing for a child than to be aware of his/her parents' sexual activity. (Well, the only thing more disturbing than that I suppose is thinking about one's own children's sexual activity....) But why should it be disturbing?? It shouldn't be. But sex is something we do in secret, and we all have our perversions, and most of us don't have a clue how to talk about sex with our children or our parents. I struggle with this as open as I am!

My mother passed away in April and I never told her about our lifestyle. I'm sure she would've been accepting of it; it's my father knowing that stopped me. He's as conservative as they come. A real Archie Bunker, and I never want him to know. The rest of my family would not accept me and I'd have to hear about it every time we texted or spoke or visited. I never told them about my husband's infidelities either; they'd have judged him and never accepted him back into the family.

I suspect my kids know about our lifestyle; on more than one occasion a text from a guy who's name my kids don't recognize has popped up and created questions. Since we're musicians, we know such a wide variety of people of all ages, I don't get all flustered like I have anything to hide and just say, "oh yeah, he's the drummer from such-and-such, he's the son of a friend of our drummer....." you get the picture. Who knows?? Maybe my daughter has figured it out. All it would take is some serious trolling and she'd figure it out. I have come very close to just sitting her down and telling her. The worst thing would be if she found out and thought I was cheating on her dad. NO SUCH THING. He knows everything. I wouldn't be in the lifestyle any other way but 100% COMPLETE AND TOTAL HONESTY.

I do believe though that teenagers are all wrapped up in themselves. To this day, my son rarely asks me, "SO, how are YOU Mom??" It's all about them. Unless it's IN THEIR FACE and they are forced to deal with it. I've heard from my kid's friends about cheating parents--actually catching them in the act. How horrible would THAT be??? That's abusive. A parent who isn't cheating but instead living the lifestyle has to be a better planner than that and more careful. I always take my kids' plans into consideration. Which is probably why I write about sex more than I actually have it LOL I mean seriously!!! Except for Allen, Jordan is the only other guy I've been with for three years. I flirt shamelessly and make dates but most of the guys are too intimidated to show up. Once my last kid is out of the house (three years) I'm sure I'l turn into the slut I've always dreamed of being!

And with that....happy hump day my sexy friends!!!!

Falling hard for someone new

Two Saturdays ago, I met someone who has temporarily made me completely forget Mickey. And I mean, COMPLETELY. Who, by the way, has been Snapchatting me quite a bit. And I am finding myself so annoyed because it's not this new guy. I'll call him Jay.

I met Jay out with hubby and friends at our favorite watering hole, a dive place on a lake that just is super fun. My friend's band was playing, so we went to support the band (we fellow band people do this for each other). They played all those cheesy 70's hits like "Brick House" and shit. We had just gotten there and were standing around drinking and chatting when this REALLY HOT GUY comes over and takes my hand and asks me to dance. I looked up at hubby and asked his permission (super sexy, and respectful) and he gave me his blessing and off we went. Jay and I burned up the dance floor. He was like fucking "Dancing with the Stars" type of dancer. Spinning me around, tango-ing and dipping me like a chip in hot sauce. It was FUN!!!!!! Too many songs in a row to count later, sweaty and thirsty, we went back to our group of friends. I don't know who he was with, but he came over and sipped out of my drink by mistake. Turns out we drink the SAME DRINK--GREY GOOSE AND RED BULL! It was a cute moment. Our eyes met at this realization and knew it was fate. LOL well I did anyways!

It was too loud to really chat, but we did take some selfies. I HAD to have a pic of him. I then said, "Give me your phone number. I'll send the best one to you." He said, 'Do you want to just send me the pic or keep texting me?" I looked up at him and said, "Keep texting you!" He smiled and gave me his number. I sent him one of the pics of us. I don't remember much of what happened next, but next thing I knew, hubby had grabbed my hand and was saying "bye" to everyone, "We gotta go!" and I looked at Jay and kissed him right on the mouth. It was short and sweet and I said "bye" and hubby dragged me out. I guess it was getting late and he was trying to keep me from getting too drunk.

Jay called and texted me for the next several hours, asking me to come meet him at yet another bar. I loved seeing his desperate calls for me while I fucked my hubby hard. Jay's texts finally stopped and they picked up first thing in the morning, and kept up all week. One night he asked to Skype and I was hesitant; told him I didn't feel comfortable being "that intimate" with him so soon and he laughed and said we could just text on it. I said I didn't know that cuz I've done the video chatting before! 

With hubby out of town, and me taking a bath, we chatted on Skype for about 2 hours. We said a lot, I got to know him a little bit better and vice versa. I didn't say too much about my past other than hubby and I were currently monogamous but had been talking about opening the marriage again. He basically said he'd been "owned" by a married couple for 2 years, being their "sub" and would my hubby and I like that? I said "OMG absolutely sounds wonderful." He told me some nasty things they did and would I like that? We left it on a great note and he continued to text me all week.

Then Saturday night came.

I texted him at 10:30 am that I was free that night and that I'd like to get together for drinks. We didn't make definite plans, but agreed to meet. Some friends wanted us to meet in city X but he said "too far", so hubby and I got everyone to agree to go to city Y which was right in his neighborhood.

HE NEVER SHOWED UP.

He had been texting me all afternoon/evening, saying he was already drunk. He last wrote around 9 pm saying he was going to try to sober up so we could "have some fun."
I never heard back that night from him. 

Sunday morning, he texted first thing and apologized. I was SO glad. We chatted for a little while back and forth. Nothing big. Just the weather and that as it's getting nice I like to wear sundresses. "without panties?" he asked. "Yes" I answered. We chatted a little more and then lastly I said, "Let's get together soon" with a kiss emoticon.

I haven't heard from him since.

WTF????

SIgh.

Why do you guys do this to us?????

I've been in hell, sorry i haven't posted in a while

Hello my dear readers, yes, you read that right, I've been in HELL for 10 weeks now. My hubby and I are having some serious marital problems. That's all I'm going to say on that subject. It's put a hold on our swinging lifestyle and yes, it hasn't been fun at all. I had to tell my two lovers I can't see them anytime soon. I miss them! They text me to check in from time to time but the answer is still the same, not yet. Sorry.

Let me just add this folks--for any of you married folk considering opening up your marriage the way we did--PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE reconsider. If only ONE of you is truly 'open", it's NOT an open marriage.

The whole idea of an open marriage is a marriage where both people can have sex with other people. The kicker is, YOU HAVE TO TELL YOUR SPOUSE BEFORE ANYTHING HAPPENS WITH OTHER PEOPLE. You have to let the other person know when you find someone attractive, you should be comfortable telling them. If you want to meet that person, have lunch or drinks or kissing or sex, YOU ADMIT IT BEFORE ANYTHING HAPPENS. Anything less than that is called CHEATING PEOPLE.

Traditional (monogamous) couples know that if one of them is kissing another person, you have broken your wedding vows. If you have sex with someone else, you have broken your vows. If you have an open marriage and do these things without telling your spouse, you have broken your vows. It's no different. You have to honor each other and the committments you have made.

Only one of us truly was capable of having an open marriage. And you can tell from this post, that person is me. I kept honest and true to my marriage and the rules of conduct within an open marriage.

I implore other married couples to do some REAL soul-searching, and maybe some counseling, before opening up your marriage to include other people.

I wish I had.

Love,
Anna XO

Slut level goes up--second new hottie in one week!

From the moment our eyes locked as I took his coat from him, I knew Adam would be spending the night with me. He was better looking in person than his profile pic--yay! and he just had an easy smile and comfort in his own skin that was making my heart beat faster. I couldn't wait to be taking off his pants instead.

                                                          

                                                                 *****************

Every time someone new had come to the door for our pre-New Year's Eve party my heart leapt--my new hottie Adam was coming! We hadn't even met yet but I had invited him anyway. What a brazen slutty thing to do! My hubby was fine with it--he was excited too to see who I had chosen for my new sex partner. Hew knew he would be young and fit and very good looking; I tend to be extremely picky and will go for long periods of abstinence (with guys other than my hubby) if I don't meet anyone who meets my standards.

I had found Adam on the dating website; his sexy physique and handsome face caught my attention amidst the hundreds of pics and emails I get on a weekly basis. He was tall and had glasses (I love a sexy dork!), lots of tattoos, slender and a pretty-boy face.  24 years old. His message was simple and sweet-"Hey beautiful, how are you today?" I responded, "Better now that I got this email from you!" and gave him my phone number. He texted me right away. We clicked immediately and I felt at ease with him. He was just the right amount of flirtatious and sweet, not at all creepy. (I can tell creepy from texting, yes). In other words, he seemed interested in me-the-person, not just someone to fuck and forget.

We had an intimate group of friends from my work, mostly 20-somethings and I hoped he'd fit right in. I was actually surprised he said he'd come to the party--he didn't know anyone, barely even me. What a great attitude! I was impressed. I do like a little bit of arrogance, I think it's sexy to have that much confidence.

He had let himself in as most of the guests had; it was snowing out and we didn't want anyone standing on the porch freezing while they waited for someone to open the door. Every time I heard the door close, I'd run over to greet my guests, take their coats, and get them something to drink. I was so excited to meet him.  When he was actually standing there, I didn't hesitate to clip-clop over in my stilettos to greet him. With a big smile and eager eyes, the chemistry between us was instantaneous, and I knew the evening would end with us naked together.

It was awkward at first, but the sexual tension is always fun. I love the anticipation; and it was only around 8:30 and the party was just getting going. There were about 15 people, and I played the good hostess, making sure the food was attractive and available and everyone had a drink in their hand. My hubby had made a cool music playlist that was just perfect. Everyone seemed to stay in the kitchen and I was happy seeing everyone laughing and enjoying themselves. Especially my hubby, who had to put up with my new boytoy and the discomfort and erotic tension having him in our house, among our friends. Only one person other than my hubby knew who he really was; everyone else thought he was just a groupie that we'd met at one of our shows. I don't really have groupies, but Adam said he'd be happy to tell people that's how we met. Being a singer in a rock band allows me to have friends like Adam and not have people bat their eyes for a second.

He seemed to be getting along well with a couple of other young guys, so I pretty much left him alone so it wouldn't be obvious we knew each other well; as if I had brought him so he could meet one of the pretty young girls there. Hahaha, no, he was mine, all mine. And he behaved himself so well. I never saw him flirting or even talking to anyone other than guys the whole night, and he only had one beer. I did enjoy teasing him and teasing myself; as my intake of martinis rose, I got braver and friskier. He was leaning against the granite island in my kitchen, and I walked up to him and pressed my pelvis against his, holding my martini. He looked at me with a sly grin, and I asked him, "How are you doing?" "Fine!" he answered, and put his hand on my hip. I was smiling and said, "Good! I'm glad!" and pulled away from him. Mmm I was already getting wet for him. I couldn't wait for everyone to leave so I could take him upstairs and take our clothes off. I sidled up to my hubby after that to check and make sure he was okay too. A sexy gleam in his eye, a grab and a kiss, and he whispered in my ear, "Let's get rid of everyone so you can have your boytoy." Great idea!

By about 2:00 am, our party had dwindled to a small group of about 5 really fun, mostly drunk friends. One was sober and the designated driver, so they all finally left. Only me, my hubby and Adam, and  one other person was still hanging out, my boss. The one I play tennis with occasionally and have had a crush on. He was way beyond inebriated, so my hubby made up a spot on the couch for him. I was so focused on getting Adam upstairs I actually forgot he was there. I was tipsy myself but not drunk. Just happy tipsy, the best kind.

I took Adam by the hand and led him upstairs to the guest bedroom. It's a very pretty room I keep clean for guests--hee hee, usually the young, male kind! My hubby walked upstairs with us; he winked at me  and slapped me hard on my ass and told me to go fuck my new boyfriend. I smiled and said, "As you wish Master", and he went to our room to wait for me to finish with my new hottie.

Adam and I walked hand-in-hand to the guest room, and as soon as we got there, he started unbuttoning his black shirt. I only had on a tight dress, no zippers, so I just kicked off my stilettos and helped him. This is just about my favorite part. Off came the dress shirt, then the white T-shirt underneath, which revealed a smooth, bare chest with just a few sexy tattoos. Before I undid his belt, I wanted to touch his body. There was no rush. He began to kiss me and he was a great kisser. I slid my hands around his torso and pulled him close and grinded my hips to his, rubbing his growing erection with my pelvis.  He kissed me deeply and passionately; mmmm a prelude to the great sex I knew was about to happen.

As we kissed, I couldn't wait another second to let his cock out. I undid his belt, and rubbed his hard cock through his boxers. Mmmm I love to tease myself. He felt so good and as I rubbed him he kissed me and kissed me. He was great with his tongue; and I didn't realize it till then that he had a double tongue piercing. It was so sexy! I'd never kissed anyone who had their tongue pierced, and his was double-pierced, so it was double sexy. He was clearly enjoying himself and so was I.

I pulled his pants down mid-kiss, and he stepped out of them. It was time to get THIS party started! He walked over to the bed and laid down on his back. I slipped out of my dress to reveal a sexy leopard strapless bra and lavender lace boy-short panties. Admiring my new outfit, he smiled and pulled me onto him for some more pelvis grinding and deep kissing. I could kiss him all night and never get enough, I thought, as he undid my bra and tossed it to the floor. I was so wet and ready for him, but the anticipation was so much fun.

Finally I grabbed his boxers at the hips and pulled them off. His cock was at full salute and I was hungry for a taste. I started at his neck and kissed and nibbled and bit lightly, teasing him, while my body was grazing his throbbing cock. He was so ready for me.  Down his chest my tongue went, tasting his beautiful young body, down his tummy. I rubbed his cock with my hand while I tasted his sweet flesh, and made my way down to his testicles and sucked and licked them. He writhed in ecstasy; it was so gratifying to know I was pleasing him. His back was arched and his hips went up and down in pleasure as I sucked and licked his balls, then up to his dick. Mmmm he was delicious. I realized then that he wasn't that big--I actually could take his entire penis in my mouth and not gag. I liked it! After B with his 10 incher it was a pleasure to not have a plunger down my throat. I liked that he was smaller and I could really please him.

I then laid down next to him and our bodies were so warm against each other. It was erotic, knowing there was 2 feet of snow outside and we were sweating. He fingered me like a magician and I came so fast and hard. I love how I can relax now and let other guys make me cum. I remember when I couldn't and only my hubby was capable of bringing me to orgasm. Not anymore!  It was my new mission--to have an orgasm with every new lover. So far I was 3 for 3!

I'd had an entire evening of foreplay. Now it was time to fuck him. I leaned over to the nightstand where I'd brought a couple of condoms, and opened one up. I think this part is so sexy. I put it over his hard cock and he flipped me gently onto my back and fucked me so hard. He had this hard fucking move he called "the jackhammer" and it was just like it sounds. Hard, fast, and nonstop. Even though he was smaller, fucking still felt just as great.

I just love how these young guys can fuck and fuck and fuck for so long and not come. I got a text from my hubby--who was just down the hall remember--and he seemed upset. "Seems you're not coming back to me tonight huh?" I realized more than an hour and a half had passed! I texted him back, "Of course I am baby! He's not done with me yet." My hubby texted me back, "Well, make him cum. I'm tired of waiting." So I knew I had to wrap things up with him.

We changed positions quite a few times, and I've learned the 'money shot" seems to be doggie style. And guys always want it, so I showed him my ass and that's all it took. Crouched on all fours on the bed, he shoved his dick in my pussy and did his "jackhammer" move and I grabbed the comforter in my hands and moaned into it. It didn't hurt as badly as when Mr. Passionate or B fucked me doggie-style cuz he wasn't as large but it was a relief. It felt good without pain (although pain can be so pleasurable...) He must've fucked me that way for at least a half hour if not longer, but finally, he shot his load into me and laid on his back, his arm tucked around me.

I took off the condom for him and laid it on the nightstand. I wanted to fall asleep that way, protective and sweet and loving, but my hubby needed attention. We nuzzled and chatted a little; I apologized I couldn't spend the night with him, that my hubby wanted me, but if he'd like to spend the night I'd come back and fuck him in the morning. Our kids were at friends' houses overnight and wouldn't be back till afternoon. He said he though he was probably going to go home. We kissed and said our goodbyes and I let him know how much I enjoyed him and would definitely want him again. He agreed, and I left him laying there and went to my hubby. I felt exhilarated and sad.

My hubby was tucked under the covers, naked, his cock hard and ready. "I listened outside your room", he told me. "I heard you fucking him. It was so hot!" He fucked me for like 3 minutes and came so hard; he was so aroused he couldn't hold it back another second. It was awesome. I love it when he wants me that badly he can't stand it.

I heard Adam say, "Bye" as I saw a glimpse of him in the dark pass by our room. I wish he'd joined us for more. I wondered how he felt, sharing me the way he did. Well, he got me first, and he got the best of me, that's for sure.

My hubby and I fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms. It was a GREAT party.
                                           
 BTW, Adam and I have a date for Thursday. My house, 1:00 o'clock in the afternoon.

I can't wait.

I have already undressed him in my mind...time to do it in person!

At one o'clock tomorrow I hope to be laying my eyes on my new boytoy face to face! I am so excited I can hardly stand it! He had cancelled our date last week and I was SO disappointed! Said he was sick. Tried again Thursday, same thing. I said I was free Friday night, and he just said he felt like staying home. Apologized and we have rescheduled for tomorrow. He lives only 15 minutes away and has been wanting to come over in the evening but I have my kids and hubby in the evenings, so maybe he's just timid, who knows. I am excited to meet him! He could be my new Mickey. If not him then.......I have someone ELSE who's REALLY interested and has been trying to get together with me! He lives about 100 miles away, not good, but he's really persistent AND young, he's 23 too, and very good looking. Great, hard body, long dark brown hair, yes, very long, past his shoulders and he looks like a rocker boy--tattoos, long thick hair. Young and very hot. I REALLY like him and every day he texts me, "come see me today". He is nice, not gross at all like some guys, I really hate too much sex talk with someone i haven't even met, it makes me feel gross and both these guys are sexy and complimentary without being gross.

I got a video from Mickey in the middle of the night last night! OMG it was better than the ones he usually sends, which are always him jerking off (which I love) but never his face. This one was of him, his beautiful face!!! He was shirtless, wearing that same knit cap he always wears, and it was a very short video. He was looking at the camera, and he said, "Does this look official? Cuz you've officially given me a boner." I saw it at like 4 am and I laughed out loud, it cracked me up. I fell back asleep and didn't write back till about 7 am (trying not to seem too desperate). I just said, "you look HOT!" and he wrote me back immediately! We sexted back and forth for a little while. I smiled all day.

My new guy I'm meeting tomorrow (who has the same name as my hubby!) said he will be "dressed in his work clothes." I was frightened LOL and had visions of steel-toed work boots and ugly coveralls. I asked him, 'What do you do?" and he said he's a financial planner and wears a suit tie!! YAY!!! He sent me 2 pics of him in a suit, one a black suit and one brown, and OMG what a handsome young stud!! I told him I can't wait to see him out of it!!! I get really turned on by a good-looking guy in a suit and tie. It's a huge turn on for me. I am already fantasizing about seeing him undress.....first the jacket comes off, and then I'l be able to see that huge bulge in his slacks. Very hot. Then he'll start to loosen his tie, and I'll start unbuttoning his dress shirt, and then as he takes off his tie I'm opening up his shirt with my hands and spread open the shirt to reveal a sexy, manly chest and softly touch it and start to kiss it. Mmmm, that's when I get a whiff of his cologne, and as he takes the shirt off, I'm already wet with anticipation. Then I undo his belt......unzip his zipper......OOOO I'm getting SOOO excited!!!

So I'm really hoping he shows up tomorrow and doesn't send me a lame text he can't make it. If he does, I'm driving to meet the other hottie.  BTW I will give these sexy men pen names if I meet them and bring them home with me. If I do, I'll be writing about it tomorrow night! Cross you fingers for me, your nasty  fingers people!!!!

Drinks at noon, sex by 1:00!

I'm SO excited to meet my new boytoy!! He's gorgeous. He's got black hair, bright blue eyes, and really full lips, just like Mickey. Damn!! He has been persistent in texting me and we are meeting at noon tomorrow, halfway between where we both live. He lives only 15 minutes away from me!!! I am SO glad I finally found someone attractive who will HOPEFULLY show up!!!

I PROMISE to tell you all about it!

Did I tell you he's only 23???

Half my age.

Yum yum!

The sex is gonna be so awesome....

If you've read that last post of mine, you have a good idea of how I feel about Mickey right now. So--it should go without saying that I did NOT buy a plane ticket to see him. I don't know if I wrote about it, but about 3 days ago, I got tired of waiting for him to respond about the fact that I'd (lied) and said "flights are so cheap, I bought I ticket to come see you. Even if all we do is have dinner. " Never heard anything, so I poked him and sent a text that said, "So, what's up for next weekend?" He wrote back immediately; said, "what do you mean?" guess he forgot what I'd said a week earlier. (maybe his GF saw it and deleted it, who knows) but anyway, I wrote again that flights were cheap and that I bought a ticket to come see him, even if only for dinner. He responded, "so you want to fly up here for dinner?" I answered back, "well, I'd like more but yeah." He wrote, "Err, I just don't think it's worth it for you to do that." I said,"I can't imagine flying all the way to the west coast and not seeing you. I miss you and I'd love to see you." Never heard back.

Now, dear readers, remember this is before the revelation of a three-year anniversary celebration. For all I knew at that moment, he was single, or maybe seeing someone, cuz he never mentioned HER. Of course, I knew about her, cuz of her Twitter. But I figured it's his burden not mine. He has cheated on her before with me so why would this be any different--he said he wasn't in love, wasn't serious, she owed him money. So I thought I'd go see him.

Since I never heard from him, I didn't actually buy a ticket, and when I went to, they were astronomical. $700 round trip to go 700 miles. Forget it. I was so disappointed; but now I'm thankful. Because knowing what I know now, he really only had two choices--cheat on her, or ditch me. And let's face it, ditching me is a whole lot easier. He really doesn't want me to come. He told me himself, and I quote, "I wouldn't get to spend a whole night with you like I want." So, he wants me to come some OTHER time, God knows when, so we can spend a whole night together. Well, forget it. I'm done. He wants me? He can fucking come see me. And pay for it himself.

On a good note, B has been calling me and we are seeing each other right after I get off the plane tomorrow!! He's so sexy and slutty. I don't know what his thing is about getting me pregnant but he's so persistent. My BFF saw his new commercial and she was drooling over him. "Damn girl!! That's your "B"??? WOWZA!!" She was very impressed. I can't wait to see him. I love his smile, love his body, and love the way he stares into my eyes and is so sweet and gentle. MMMMM yummy!!

I'll write details when I get back. I'm hoping he'll let me take a couple of body pics since he wouldn't let me take any face pics last time. Probably worried I'll go to the National Enquirer or something LOL I'd never do that!!! I just want a pic of us together, just for me.

Ciao my beautiful readers, hope you all have a safe and sexy weekend as well!

Love,
Anna XO

If you really want to impress me, call me at 4 am.......

B called me at 4 am this morning and told me he wants me to come see him as soon as I get to LA! I can't wait to see him. I feel so comfortable with him--he's so sexy, so comfortable in his own skin. He is just easy to be around. He makes me feel so sexy and he just adores me. I hope he does get me pregnant--i'll have him in my life forever. Chances are 50-50 so we'll see. I really don't know why it's so important to him--I'm happy to just keep him my fuck-buddy, we have such a good time together. And I love that I'm his "dirty little secret". Well, I'd like to be more--damn wouldn't it be cool to be on his arm at some red carpet event?? Damn. Who knows. If I have his baby, the press will eventually find out. I like that I know a side of him no one else knows, cuz he is so comfortable with me.  I love the way he looks right into my eyes when he talks to me, those big brown eyes. I told my BFF about his new commercial and sent her his pic and she was like, DAMN he's HOT!!!!!!!!! I told her, yes, he is! I can't wait to grab that luscious long wavy brown hair in my fist while I ride him. Mmmmm 2 weeks!!!

Mickey is AWOL since I texted him I bought a plane ticket to come see him. I haven't heard a peep. I told him tickets were so cheap I decided to just come see him--that I remembered what he said (meaning about "having me in his life sexually right now is not healthy for me") and that I just wanted to have dinner---that I just want to gaze into those gorgeous blue eyes. No response yet. I'm biting at the bit to keep from contacting him--but going to just sit tight.

In the meantime, I'm writing Mr. Irish Accent daily and keeping in great shape for my romp with B (and hopefully Mickey). I'm down to 123 and look pretty good. I'm happy to say I don't think I need to lose any more weight! I'm all muscle now, what with 2 hours of tennis 5 days a week and weightlifting.

On a different note, my hubby's talking about taking a trip to go see his GF, the one that came here. I have to let him go and not make a fuss---it's only right, right?? Although it wasn't part of our original agreement....I get to do what I want so it's only fair. I don't feel threatened by her so maybe she's the right one for him to do this with.

It's funny---B, and Damien, and all these hot 20-something guys, but all my heart wants is Mickey. I'm really trying to leave him alone. He WILL come back to me, he always does. She's 20 for God's sake. And he's a confirmed committment phobe. I just have to sit tight.

Maybe, just maybe, I'll fall for someone else. I really really really want to. I did fall for Jake, but that ended badly. I wish I knew why. He really made me forget Mickey. That relationship had such promise, but maybe it was all in my head. I KNOW I can get over Mickey if I can just find someone to replace him. I've BEEN looking my dear readers! I really have! And I'm STILL looking!

Tomorrow night I will write about my hubby's GF's visit last month. I promise.

Stay tuned.

Love,
Anna XOXO

I was watching TV in the kitchen while I was cooking dinner last night and saw "B" in a commercial! I screamed to my hubby, "THAT'S B! LOOK!! and sure enough, there he was! What a hottie! I can't tell you anymore about it cuz certainly you'd know him....I texted him immediately to tell him I saw him, and of course, since he's got the biggest ego of anyone alive he responded right away. He was pleased as punch. I congratulated him and said I wanted to youtube it so I could see it over and over. He laughed. 


I bought my plane ticket to go see him yesterday! Or--should I say, my hubby did. I will be there in 2 weeks. I can't wait to fuck him! MMMMM "B" is delicious. 


I lied to Mickey and told him I bought a plane ticket to see him. I texted him, "hey, flights are so cheap so I bought a ticket. I'll be there on Nov. 13th. Let's just have dinner. I want to gaze into those amazing blue eyes." That was yesterday--haven't heard back yet. I'm sure he's processing it--he wants to see me, he wants more than dinner--but he's living with his GF. BUT-----and this is a big BUT---he has never admitted to having a girlfriend. He doesn't know I stalk him LOL yes I read his facebook and his GF's twitter--hey, if I didn't, I wouldn't know what the fuck is going on with him! it's a way to protect myself. Yes, and torture myself, that's true.  He told me a couple weeks ago basically not to come, that seeing me sexually "isn't healthy for me right now, I'm trying to do too much", whatever the fuck that means. He talks so cryptically. Why won't he just admit he's got a GF and they're getting serious? Because he doesn't want to hurt me? Please. Yeah right. It's because he doesn't want me to go away. He wants to know that I'll always be here for him when he wants me. It's like in Toy Story, I don't know which one, I think the first, where Woody says, "It's not how much we're played with; it's that we're here when Andy needs us." That's me for Mickey. It's not how much he plays with me, it's that I'm here when he wants me. Don't tell me I'm pathetic. I already know I am. 


I had a conversation with a girlfriend of mine about Mickey, and it really sums up why I put up with him. We were talking about being "in love", and what does that really mean? Is it possessive? What if it's not reciprocated? And I told her, for me being "in love" is this: it's thinking about the other person 24/7. It means that no matter what you are doing, you are thinking about them. It is worrying about their well-being. It means that if they were in trouble or sick you would answer the phone in the middle of the night and listen. It means you'd jump on a plane and be there for them at the drop of a hat. It means you'd give them money you don't have if they were struggling financially. Being "in love" to me means all these things. And no matter how much I'd like it to go away, it hasn't where Mickey is concerned. It's been almost 8 years we've known each other now, and the only way I'll ever truly get over him is probably when I die. I have 2 great loves in my life--him, and my hubby. 


                                      *******************


I'm sorry I haven't had time to tell you all about my hubby's girlfriends' visit. And I'm sorry to say I've run out of time right now. My life has been so hectic and insane, but I PROMISE to write this week. You deserve to hear it. It was a very trying week, good and bad, sexy and unsexy. You will enjoy it though.


Have a good day my beloved readers, and oh, yes, now you know what I look like. Let me know if that changes anything for you in how you perceived me. Did I lack credibility before by hiding my identity? It's scary for me but I thought it necessary. I hope you all approve. I did it for you.


Love,
Anna XO

NEW PIC FOR MY READERS!

Hello everyone! I thought you all deserved to see that I'm real, so here I am. I posted a pic of my face for you all.

New profile pic and catching up

Hello my dear readers, I'm sorry so much has happened and I've been so busy I'm way behind. I know you all want to know how it went with my hubby new GF here....and I will tell you everything. I promise. But in the last 2 days there's been a new development with Mickey that I just have to get off my chest.

I have been trying to plan a trip to go see him for 2 weeks now. I'd have bought my plane ticket already but fucking Mickey wouldn't answer my texts or my IM's and so I didn't know if he was going to show up or not. I wanted to make sure what day off he would get so I planned well. We did play phone tag--it was sooo nice to have him call me nearly every day, or he'd answer the phone the second it rang when I called him, but we never talked for more than a couple minutes. He'd wake me in the middle of the night, and apologize for waking me, and then he'd tell me he'd call me tomorrow. This went on for the whole 2 weeks. He'd call me from work and have to hang up and wouldn't call me back till the next day. It was so schizo.

Finally, two days ago, out of the blue (his last text to me was June 2nd) I get a text from him that says, "I can't have you come see me. Having you in my life sexually is not healthy for me. I'm trying to focus on way too much."  I was shocked and sat on that for about a half hour. I was sad, but not surprised. We've been through this before, it's not the first time, so I was disappointed but ok with it. I remember the first time he did this to me---it was 7 years ago.  We had a Friday night date and he called me and told me, "I can't do this anymore", and how I was crying so hard, I was distraught--pleading with him to reconsider. I drove to his apartment and met him there--we sat in my car and he was cold as ice. That was the first time he broke my heart. It wasn't but 2 weeks later he was in my bed.

So I read his text and knew it was that night all over again, only I'm 1800 miles away so I can't just drive there and beg him to reconsider. And I'm a different girl now--I know he'll come back to me, and I told him so.  I asked him what was going on, what changed--that he had said he was single and had asked me to come see him, so WTF? And you know what??! He won't say it. He won't say he has a GF or that they're getting serious cuz he doesn't want to lose me. He talks so cryptically. "I'm not sure about anything right now," he told me. "What aren't you sure about?" I ask. "Work and such", he answers. Refusing to talk about anything in any detail whatsoever.

Knowing full well he wants me and will come back to me, first I was compassionate and told him I was sorry to hear. I was texting my best GF at the same time to get advice, and she thought I ought to tell him about "B". So I did. I said I was going to LA to see my BF and wish I was with him instead. He wrote me, "If I were even to see you now I can't stay the night or spend the day with you like I'd want". Oh happy day!! SEE???!! He DOES still want me!! So that was good enough for me.

I decided to tease him then--told him, "hey! Meet me in LA!!!" he said simply, "Can't".  I sent a sad face, and asked if he'd come here instead. He said he wasn't sure! Which meant "maybe I willl" or "I want to so fucking bad but can't figure out how to actually get away with it." Then my very sexiest naked pic of myself and said, "just to tease you...." and he loved it. It went on from there--I told him about my hubby's GF and sent him a couple pics of the two of us together and he loved them. He asked for more.

I know my Mickey. He loves to be single, he loves to be free. He hates to be tied down. He is a commitment-phobe and he will tire of her. I just have to be patient and not bug him, but yet, at the same time, he craves those texts from me that I am thinking of him.

The last thing I haven't told you is yes, I stalk him on Facebook. He and his GF have pages and although her wall is private, her info is not. It has always said under the relationship status that she is "complicated with...." and Mickey's name and pic. His is private so I can't read it, but I happened to look at their pages again last night and hers said instead, "in a domestic partnership with Mickey." WTF??? I looked at his page, and on his wall he'd written, "sorry, no, I'm not engaged, just clicked the wrong relationship status. I'm not getting married quite yet." To which a female friend who looks about my age wrote, "you're such a tease!" Just tonight I looked at them again and a guy friend wrote on her page, "Are you guys gay?" hahaha yeah WTF a "domestic partnership" doesn't sound very hot or sexy. More like roommates.

I know, I know, I'm just fooling myself. They are living together. But I asked him a few weeks ago--"are you in love?" and he said a resounding NO! So who knows.

I have to let go eventually--maybe he is getting serious about her and doesn't want to hurt my feelings. I need to just let go right now, before I get hurt again. I'm really ok, more disappointed than anything, but sad too.

I'm thinner and in better shape than ever cuz I knew I was going to see him. Well, it will be appreciate by  B! I am excited to see him.

I'll tell you all about my hubby's GF as soon as I have time. It's the middle of the night right now and I have to get up at 6:30 am.

Oh wow!! B is calling!! yay!!! Just when I needed him.

Thanks for reading, and good night.

Love and kisses,
Anna XOXOX

My hubby's GF is coming to visit--and I'm getting anxious

I am SO glad the kids are in school all day long so I have some time alone to myself tomorrow to reflect on the upcoming weekend's events. My hubby's new GF is flying out here on Saturday, and I'm just a mess of mixed feelings.  I can bring out my inner lesbian for a night, if I drink enough, but a whole week?? I'm feeling very anxious. She is almost a complete stranger to me--we do text a little and write on Facebook now and then but she is HIS acquaintance, not mine. I've got to do this for my hubby. He does SO much for me.  He deserves this, I know he does.

My BFF tells me to just embrace her and do it for my hubby.

I want to . I really do. I know she isn't planning on trying to steal my hubby. She sent him a text yesterday that said simply, "I had a dream I was kissing your wife." oooo well isn't THAT interesting??!! So....anyway, I'm going to try to really be a good hostess and be very nice and polite and hopefully drink enough to have some great threesome sex!! I PROMISE to write next week and fill y'all in on our extracurricular activities!!

I told B I went to the gyno (I actually didn't---I looked up info online) and told him I got a "green light". He texted me back ASAP wanting to know what my timeframe was. I said I was planning on coming to see him mid-October. He is soooo excited!!!! (I am too!)

I can't decide how to plan my trip! I want to work in seeing my parents as well--should I see them first? I know I can't wait to see Mickey. I think I'll go see my parents first, then drive to LA and see B and maybe spend the night in LA. Then fly out to see Mickey in Oregon the next morning, it'll be a quick flight. Then fly home, with Mickey's touch still fresh on my skin, his scent still on my body. I want him to drive me to the airport, kiss me goodbye, and drive away thinking about ME. I really can't wait to see him. It's been a year since we saw each other.

I just love how intense he gets with me. He writes me in the middle of the night--"where are you? why aren't you writing me? Talk to me". It's so awesome. I feel so happy.

On a different note, I did meet someone FINALLY who lives in the same city as me!! He is 21, super good-looking--long black hair, dark eyes, very sexy. He took yesterday off from work to meet me but neglected to tell me and I was too busy to see him! I couldn't just drop everything--sadly LOL We are still trying to get together.

I'm still playing tennis with my boss at least once a week, sometimes two, and I'm feeling more and more at ease around him. He's letting his hair grow, and has that stubble from not shaving that is oh so sexy. When he talks I find myself imagining kissing him and realize that I'm not listening! One of these days when he calls me on it, I may have to nerve to admit why. We are working together tomorrow night--a special function--and I don't have to wear my dorky uniform so I plan on flirting heavily with him. My new fantasy about him is to go with him to the storage closet and shut the door (which automatically looks from the outside) and grab him and plant a big wet kiss on that sexy mouth! He's got the most perfect straight, white teeth (next to Mickey) and I'm telling you, the stubble is hella sexy.

Bedtime now my dears. I'll be too busy drinking, smoking pot, and being naked to write till next week so hope y'all have a great weekend and I'll fill you all in on this weekend's shenanigans on Friday (next Friday).

Love always,
Anna XOXOXO

My vibrator and I give Mickey a show he'll never forget

"You're soooooo pretty!!" Mickey cooed into the phone to me, gazing at me onscreen with somewhat sad puppy dog eyes. We were on yahoo messenger this morning, both on our webcams, and neither of us could stop smiling. It was so wonderful seeing his face again, after such a long time, and he clearly was happy to see mine as well.

The familiar chime on my iPhone woke me up about 3 minutes before my alarm was set to go off. "Hey", Mickey texted. We chatted off and on for about an hour while I got my kids off to school. Happily he said, "want to get on webcam?" and I decided right then and there that this offer was better than my plans to hit the gym, so I said, "Sure! Gimme 10 minutes. I want to look good for you." I turned on my curling iron and put on a little bit of makeup, found a sexy red lacy nightgown that showed off my breasts (Mickey's favorites) and I was online.

The minute I saw his face I started smiling. He was smiling too. It was wonderful. Like no time had passed. He looked as hot as ever, his long black hair all disheveled around his face, his lip ring dangling ever so teasingly, his full-sleeve tattoos so colorful and sexy. He was wearing a black T-shirt, and I was just salivating. Then he moved his laptop so I could see better--and he had his cock and balls peeking out from his underwear, these "tighty-whitey" undies in green and blue. I was shocked and laughed and wrote, "very hot!" He laughed and tucked them back in.

We wrote to each other as we gazed nervously at each other. I suggested Skype since on that webcam you can talk to each other. I told him I wanted to hear his voice. He couldn't remember his Skype name (yay, means he hasn't been using it with some other girl). I saw him pick up his phone, and I was tempted to write, 'who are you calling?" cuz that's really bad ettiquette--to be on webcam and call someone else. I was miffed instantly, until I heard his song, "Mickey" by Toni Basil start playing. He was calling ME!! haha (joke was on me!) I looked at my phone and sure enough, there was his face, the pic I'd chosen, and his name.

I answered in my best Lauren Bacall voice, a husky, "hey you", and he sounded just as sexy back. It was so wonderful, hearing his voice again. I told him so. He said all the right things again, just as always. After a few minutes he pulled out his cock again and started touching himself. He said, "show me those beautiful tits of yours", so I pulled down the red straps to my nightgown and gave him a little glimpse. Teasing him. He rubbed himself watching and yeah, I was getting very turned on! The whole time this was going on, he was talking to me, telling me how much he wanted me to come see him. He said, "I'm off work on Mondays and Tuesdays, and if you come then I'll get to spend the whole night with you." I smiled inside and out and said I'd see what I could do. Hubby travels a lot with work and the kids have school weekdays so not sure but I'd see what I could arrange. He told me, "Just give me a date." I said I'd let him know. I told him I hadn't bought a plane ticket yet so I'd check and see what I could do.

He also told me he was in trouble of being fired. That poor guy has issues, for sure, but he's always been a good worker. He's had this job like 6 years, so I asked him what's going on. He said, "they're douchebags!" and didn't want to talk about it. I let it go. He just wanted to focus on me.

He kept asking me, "when are you coming here?" lol then I broached the subject that was lingering in the air---what about his GIRLFRIEND?!?! He said, "let's not go there right now", so I laughed and said, "ok". I said, "I know you're not in love with her. You told me so." He said, "you're right, I'm not." I said, 'You're in love with me!" Now he has NEVER used the "L" word with me, and no, he didn't, but he did say, "yeah, that's it", so that made me happy! He said he wants to come visit me and plans to. He said, "I just might move in with you." I said, "really???" ecstatically and he said, "yeah, and it might be soon if they fire me." I said, "don't tease me!" which made him laugh. He was obviously in pain and in his own weird way was reaching out for sympathy, to be understood and heard. He knows I will give it to him.

He asked to see more of me, and I obliged. He was very complimentary and kept gently telling me what he wanted me to do, and what he wanted to do to me when I come to visit. He also asked where my hubby was several times, and that sometime he wanted to watch us both having sex. I told him, 'sure! that would be fun!" Since he has seen it in person I'm sure he'd like to watch us again. He said he wants to DP me with my hubby. I've never done that with anyone, not really crazy about the idea but said for him I'd try it. I trust them both to be gentle and to stop if I asked them to. So, WTF, I told him yeah, that would be ok. It was all fantasy right now anyway. Then he slipped off his undies and was just in his T-shirt. I said, 'Take off your T-shirt!" and he refused! I was like, WTF? Ok whatever! I said I want to see your chest. I love all your tats, I want to see them. He giggled and said, 'no, I've gained a few pounds", so I respected that. LOL Even though I couldn't see a trace of fat anywhere. He looked the same to me.

He asked if I had any toys. Yep of course I do! I told him, and went to get a vibrator. I grabbed the first one I found, and the batteries were dead LOL and we both laughed. I used it anyway, and he said he wanted to watch me come. And of course, since we were on the phone together, he heard all my heavy breathing and panting, and he stroked his cock harder and harder as I got more and more excited. Which I did for him, right there on camera. I've never done THAT before for anybody! It was so exciting. OMG I was splayed out on my bed, legs spread, back arched and stroking myself with a purple vibrator and watching him stroking his cock, watching me, holding the phone with his other hand, and that gaze in his eyes, very sexy. Since the batteries were dead I had to work that thing back and forth but it worked, I had a huge orgasm right there on camera for my Mickey. He loved it. I was a bit embarrassed afterward but he thanked me and kept telling me how much he loved it and couldn't wait to be with me.

After a few more minutes, he said he had to go. I said I did too, and I blew him a kiss onscreen for him and said goodbye. He was looking right at me and smiled, and gave me a "bye" in that sexy, breathy voice of his.  I don't know if the GF came in the room or what. After I clicked "off", I could still see him onscreen, and he kept stroking his cock for about a minute then turned off the camera. He didn't come, and that was disappointing, but oh well. It was still awesome.

I can't believe what that boy does to me. I'm old enough to be his mom, AND his girlfriend's mom. He's 27 and she's 20. But he doesn't see me that way. I'm a woman, a REAL woman, and he knows I'm crazy about him.

I think I'm going to be smiling a lot today.

Finding happiness in the middle of the night

Long after I'd gone to sleep two nights ago, I hear the familiar chime on my iPhone on my nightstand. It's Mickey. FINALLY. He's on yahoo messenger at long last, and writes me his usual, "what's up?" like a whole month hasn't passed but just a few days.

How I longed for the strength to ignore him. I laid there in the dark, staring at his user name, and his words, but I was too happy and relieved to have any sort of resolve. I wrote him back immediately, "hey sexy man, where've you been?" Thanks to my detective work (called Google) I knew I wasn't going to take any excuses.

He started in with his usual, "busy". I said, 'Bullshit". Ok, I actually didn't say that, but I wanted to. That's what I was thinking. I ignore it and asked if he'd gotten a phone yet--knowing full well he did. Yeah, he said. I asked him what hasn't he called or texted me? Had he changed his number? He said no, same number. I said I'd texted and called him and no response. He said simply, "my GF  gets mad." Hmmm.

Since he doesn't actually talk in complete sentences on yahoo messenger, I ask them and wait for answers. I was bold and pretty straightforward. Even though I'd been sound asleep moments earlier. The gist of his situation is this--he's back and forth with the same GF he'd cheated on with me that fateful June 25th day in that hotel room way back when I first started this blog!! Two years ago? Three? I can't even remember. Yes, same girlfriend.

I asked him if he was happy with her. He said, "comes and goes." WOW isn't he descriptive? What the hell does that mean??! So I poked and prodded him. Because I always feel that every single encounter with him could be the last. I try to get as much out of him every time JUST IN CASE.

He teased me back.  He said, "you'll be sad when I get married." So I said, "why is that?" hahaha I used to say things like, "oh, I know, I don't know how I'll handle it." But not now. He has worn me down. 

He didn't answer. So I said next, "So! When's the wedding?" and I was about to say, "so I can send my gift" but he quickly answered, "LOL I'm not getting married!" I've been down this road with him before and I know it will come one day. And no, I am not prepared, and yes, he's right, I WILL be sad. I'll be more than that though--I'll be distraught.

But I didn't want to tell him that. So I started teasing him back. I said, "Marry me". He said, "but you're already married." I said, "So I can marry you too. The three of us. I'll be faithful to you and my hubby."

He was like, hmmm, what do I say to that?? He just said, "How would that work?" and I said, "very well actually! You'll get everything you want. Emotionally, financially, in every way." I could tell he was intrigued.

I teased him further to show I wasn't jealous. I told him I didn't mind sharing him as long as he was in my life. I said he could date others even if I was faithful to him. He was just floored. He said, "are you trying to bribe me?" and I said, " Hey, whatever works!!" lol

I then said, "I'll be your GF is cute. Is she into girls? Let's have a 3sum!" He said, 'No, no, that part of my life with you is separate from her." boo hoo I said too bad LOL I told him I had a boyfriend in LA and that I'm going to see him in a few weeks (B). He got jealous! Yay! I told him, "nah, I'm just going to see my parents. I want to stop and see you" So we talked about me getting a posh hotel room near him and him coming to see me. He truly wants to, I know he does, but he is "trying to be a good boy" so I'm not planning on going to see him now.

That did lead to an interesting conversation about non-monogamy, and how it doesn't work for us or most people, although they won't admit it. I said, "do you think for a second your GF doesn't have the hots for other guys? Of course she does, but she can't tell you, just like you can't tell her about me." OH I forgot to tell you!!! I asked him about the card I sent. "What card?" was his response. I told him about it, and then asked, "does your GF get your mail?" he said yes, I said, "Well, that explains why you never got it. I'm certain she intercepted it." He said nothing.

So....anyway...he's still online, 2 days later, and writing me all the time again. Why now? What has changed?? Nothing, he's still involved with her. But I did tell him, "you always come back to me." After a long pause, he said, "you're right, I do." 

So we'll see where this goes. My heart has hardened and I'm tougher than I used to be. I get him now, like I never got him before, and I actually feel sorry for his girlfriend, because he has broken her heart so many times (I know from her poetry I found online--thank you again Google) and he will break it again. I don't know if I want him that badly anymore. We should both dump him!!!

Damn it's those blue eyes, those dimples, that sexy voice and the way he makes us feel.

Fuck.

A new movie is out about swinging

There's a new movie that just came out called, "Swinging With the Finkles", and I just heard about it. I saw the trailer, and I had to run straight to my laptop and tell you all about it! It stars Martin Freeman and Mandy Moore as your typical adorable but bored married couple who decide to spice things up a bit in the bedroom by swinging with another married couple. I have not seen it yet---I merely saw a pop-up ad for it on Facebook this morning.

If I were 20 years younger, I'd probably laugh my head off at this movie, like my teenage son did when he and his teenage friends watched "Hall Pass". The subtext goes right over their immature pre-frontal-cortex brains. I tried to have a conversation about that movie and it was futile--he thought it was insanely funny and for that, Hollywood succeeded.

This appears to me to be another lame Hollywood attempt to broach the subject of what to do when married couples hit that inevitable plateau in their sex lives. The biggest problem with these types of movies is that they are made to be palatable for everyone, because the more people that go to see it, the more money they'll make. And Hollywood is all about the bottom line.

Since I haven't seen the film (and intend to do so ASAP) I will instead offer what I wish Hollywood, or most likely, an Idie film company do. And readers, if you know of such a film exists, I hope you'll let me know.

It seems from the trailer that as this married couple decide to find another couple to swing with, they "interview" prospective couples from the living room couch the way you'd interview a housekeeper or babysitter.  Those of us who are ACTUAL swingers know it doesn't work that way! First of all, how did they end up on their couch? Will Hollywood show the Adult Friend Finder or Craigslist ads of this couple? No, probably not.

What I do like from the trailer, however, is the subject of man-with- man sex is addressed. But, of course, it appears it takes the subject lightly--"this doesn't mean I'm gay does it?" the husband asks the other man. "Of course not", he says. I would like to see a man embracing his bi-sexuality. Why can't he enjoy his gay side? If anyone cares to know this, the Kinsey scale on pure heterosexuality is not the norm.  I get so so tired of it being socially acceptable for women to be tit-on-tit but two penises touching? So scandalous!!! Check it out on Kinsey's official site: http://www.iub.edu/~kinsey/research/ak-hhscale.html#what

I would like to see, and maybe if it doesn't exist I should write it---the serious, sometimes funny, always sexy and raunchy truth about swinging. Wouldn't you? Is America truly not ready for the truth? After all, "Swinging with the Finkles" is a British movie.

That's it. I'm doing it. I'm going to write it myself.

Who should star in it? How about two completely unknown and talented actors?

Gotta go.

Check out the trailer: http://youtu.be/6tKycPLM0po