Catching up

This will be the most honest blog post I've ever written.

I haven't written anything here since November....????!! I guess you can say I've been a bit busy.

I'm still seeing "James", who I will call "Jesus" going forward bc that's my nickname for him with my friends bc well, he looks like Jesus. Long flowing black hair, bright blue eyes, perfect white teeth and the one-inch or so full beard. He's truly beautiful.

It's been 4-1/2 months we've been seeing each other now, and my life has completely turned upside down. We began seeing each other every Thursday night and with the exception of last night, I've spent the night with him every single Thursday night since we met November 7th.

My hubby hasn't dealt with this well at all (understandably).

In the poly community, they'd call what I have with Jesus "NRE" or "new relationship energy" which is something to be "managed". So for the last four and a half months, I've been head-over-heels for this new guy, and my marriage has taken quite a beating. My husband and I have fought nearly every single day. For a guy that is never jealous, this has caught him quite by surprise.

Early on, things came out of my mouth that shocked the both of us. I said things like, "if you make me choose between you or Jesus, I will choose Jesus." After 26 years of marriage??? Yes. I truly felt that way.

And I still do. How the fuck can he possibly stay with me?

I think he just knows me better than I know myself. I think he knows it's some sort of mid-life crisis. I mean come on. My boyfriend is 26 years old. I'm twice his age. It can't "go" anywhere. He wants a wife and kids someday. And he should have that.

And yes, he calls me his girlfriend. I love it. He even commented on a coffee cup I have that says, "good morning gorgeous" that it was "trying to steal my girlfriend" haha. So cute.

We are in love. I said it to him first, and he says it back now. I told my husband I'm not in love with him anymore. But I DO still love him. But not the way he deserves to be loved.

We've almost split up several times now. We've had the most ferocious arguments. He's tried harder than anyone else ever would to tolerate this behavior of mine and try to ride it out. Sometimes he's done quite well while I was staying overnight at Jesus' house, and other times, he would panic and freak out, calling me, or smashing something at home, or getting black-out drunk to try to cope. Once a couple weeks ago we were on a double date with him and he got so verbally and physically abusive he was thrown out of the club. Jesus told me he "never wanted to see his face again". My best girlfriend is done with him too. And me?? I was done and made him sleep in the guest room. And then I took him back two days later.

He begged for a second chance, which actually, is a third chance (bc of the cheating). I felt like the marriage deserved it. And he does too. He's so remorseful, he totally owns how he behaved. But I had to make him see that just bc I will forgive him doesn't mean my boyfriend or best friend will. He says he was black-out drunk and barely remembers it, but he doesn't minimize its effect on us.

And now Jesus won't come to my gigs. And husband knows it's bc of him being in the band. He feels terrible about it but it is what it is.

I went and looked at an apartment and told Jesus all about it. At the time I saw it, I had every intention of moving there alone. I was so hurt and angry at my husband for his behavior. Since then he's worn me down and made me feel compassion instead of anger. It's bc he just kept so many emotions and jealousy under the surface and seeing the two of us together just boiled over for him he said.

"It's still no excuse" he says. He is taking ownership of it. But I can't get his mean angry face out of my head. The finger in my face saying, "FUCK YOU"  over and over again. Pushing me. Seeing my boyfriend jump off a barstool to defend me.

So here we are now, boyfriend and I are doing quite well but something is off. I had to tell him I was giving my husband another chance. I can't lie or pretend I'm divorcing him if I'm not. And it seems he may be pulling back. Our sex life isn't what it used to be. Other than that little thing LOL our relationship seems perfectly fine. My husband went out of town for work this week and I had Jesus over for 3 days. We didn't even leave the house one day. We laugh and talk and cuddle and get along so well, but not enough sex tbh. I have been trying to get up the courage to ask him about it but have failed. The night I was going to try we both got stoned and drunk (kind of what we do lately) and he waxed poetic about how he loves me and told all his friends about me and how they all want their own "MILFY" (his nickname for me). How I take such good care of him. How happy he is. How he'd "do anything" for me.

And he's sooooooo affectionate. He is very gentle and kind and I've never seen him upset or complain about anything. We are twins that way. We really are so much alike. Even when my husband was in his face he just said, "Dude, go home". He said he really wanted to punch him but he wouldn't do that bc of me. And my husband yelled to him, "SHE LOVES YOU. SHE DOESN'T LOVE ME. YOU CAN HAVE HER!!" and that he wants a divorce. He says he doesn't want one so why would he say that? Bc he was "trying to get my attention." He sure got it alright.

So idk really what I want---my husband and I both drank the Poly kool-aid through and through and I just don't know if I can manage two relationships at the same time. I think for it to truly work you have to feel the same way about both people. I don't. And that's where my husbands' jealousy comes from. He knows I don't feel the same way about him anymore.

Will I ever?? Things are better right now. We even had sex. But he said I was crying for Jesus the whole time. How sad and pathetic is that?? What the fuck. I do know this partying is getting out of control. It's fun until it isn't.

We are both in therapy and I've called a couple's counselor my therapist recommended but she's out on surgery leave and we are getting impatient. I don't know what's going to happen. I really can't think properly anymore. There's so much drama and emotion going on 24/7.

We are going to Singapore next week. My husband has factories there and I'm tagging along finally. He wanted to get a ticket for Jesus and I just thought it was a bad idea. It was a very hard decision but I still think it was for the best. I will have one day on my own there as well as a 15 hour flight home. I need the alone time to think about what I want.  I am looking forward to the trip and when I get back, hubby will still be gone for an additional 4 days I can have Jesus over.

Anyways, this is why you haven't heard from me for awhile. Things have been so crazy. I'm very happy, happier than I've been in a long time, and it hurts so much to know I'm causing my husband so much pain.

Will keep you posted.

Love always,
Anna xoxoxoxox

Date #2 (technically speaking)

If you drove past me this morning as I was leaving James' apartment, you'd have seen a girl doing the "walk of shame", but one-up worse--I was in heels and it had snowed overnight. At least I wasn't in a dress (jeans whew). I clump-clump-clumped verrrryyy carefully to my snow-covered car, only to realize not only did I not have an ice scraper but I'd also gotten a $35 ticket. Of course the heels I was wearing were open-toed (it was honestly nice out last night! It had warmed up to 40!) so my toes were totally covered in snow and were frozen. I jumped in my car and started the engine, rolled down the passenger window first and brushed the snow off with my hand, and then did the same with the driver's side window.

And the whole while, I was grinning. I was enjoying my predicament to the fullest. I think I even giggled out loud a couple times. Here I am, this mature older woman, a mother, MARRIED, ...and I'm just leaving another man's apartment. I LOVE MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last night I picked him up and we went to a restaurant here that's a super famous Middle-Eastern place with hookahs. I couldn't tell him that I remember when my teenage daughter asked for money from me to go there once a couple years ago and I read her the riot act. I had never "hookah'd" and it sounded dumb and a waste of money, and something like getting high.

And here I was hehehe

The hostess asked "booth or table?" and James said, "booth please" and she led us to the very last booth in the back of the restaurant! I asked him, "where should I sit?" and he patted the seat and said, "right here beautiful" and I said, "so we can make out?" and he smiled and said, "of course!" And that's what we did. Walking to our table I saw these weird things on everyone's table--I'd say it looks similar to a small bagpipe, and there was someone at each table sucking on one end of it and puffing the vapor out, some quite talented making little circles. I felt like I was in a strange and exotic land.

I ordered a lemon drop martini, and he said he'd try one too, and then we had to order what flavor of hookah. Seems there's an entire menu devoted to just hookah flavors! We chose "Gummy Bear", and next thing I knew, a young guy full of tattoos calmly walks over to our table , sucking on our "bagpipe" thingy and exhales a stream of vapor. I was like, hmmm, that doesn't look sanitary LOL and sure enough, he set the thing up on on our table and took off his mouthpiece and gave us two new ones that were wrapped in cellophane.

I wasn't sure what to expect, and James was having fun describing what the high was going to be like, and kept asking me if I "felt" anything. I said, "it's hard to discern bc I'm on my second martini!" LOL We ordered appetizers--lamb sliders for him (I don't eat most meat) and something we giggled about called "Shawarma" French fries. We both barely ate, we were either having a very lively conversation or making out! It was so so so fun. If I die today I will die a very happy woman.

He's so damn good looking, those blue eyes and hair longer than mine, scruffy beard and he's just as smart. He's a double-major--pre-law and political science and politically active, but not like a Trumper or anything. He isn't even Republican. He's Independent and we agree on just about everything politically which is such a breath of fresh air. The most amazing thing about him isn't his looks tho, he's just as positive a person as I am. NO depressed guy here. He walks on the sunny side of the street just like I do. He's just good vibes all around. And he isn't stingy with the compliments! Which I live for. His nickname for me is "sweet-thing" but he usually calls me "beautiful". I don't know if he even knows my name LOL now that I think of it I don't think he's ever called me by my name! But I haven't either now that I think of it.....hmmm curious!

We talked about everything, and he told me his uncle actually is transgender and is now his aunt, and his grandma is gay! He said she always was but was afraid to come out until his uncle (now aunt) went through his transition. He was an "oops" baby too and raised by his grandparents. So he's had an interesting childhood, and he's very open-minded.

Dinner was just fabulous and I don't mean the food. We barely ate. I paid (I knew he couldn't afford it on his college income LOL) and he said he wanted to take me to the bar we met at (insert heart emoji here). He said he'd get the tab there. I said "deal!" It WAS a nice evening and we walked there. When we got there it was totally packed with young people all wearing team shirts and watching the game on a gigantic screen. He asked me what I wanted--grey goose and diet sprite, and he had grey goose and Red Bull. He asked if I'd do a shot with him and said yeah! He got us both one, it's called something like "rumple mint" and it left our breath fresh and minty so we had to kiss some more! It was so fun being in a bar like that with him. And trust me, I felt like I stood out like a sore thumb bc I was the only one not wearing green. But no one stared. I love the big city, I don't get bullied or stared at for the provocative way I dress. And I'm with a guy nearly half my age! But nobody cares. It's so awesome.

We drank and we talked more, kissed more, smiled constantly (I love his direct eye contact and his eyes are always smiling....just like him). I loved how he remembered things I had told him and he asked a lot of questions this time to really get to know me. I loved it. And I loved how he told me about these friends of his he wants me to meet, and told me how he's told several of them about me! I hope he finds me special! I really don't know how he feels but it's moving at a really nice, healthy pace. I'm cautious and trying really hard not to get smitten.

Finally we decided to go. On the way out, I saw that they had a backdrop so I said excitedly, "let's have someone take our picture! Would that be ok??" and he said "yeah!!!" so I asked a waiter that was walking past me and he said "sure!" After he took it he asked to see it and then asked me to send it to him.

And he LITERALLY JUST TEXTED ME AS I'M WRITING THIS, "DAMN WE LOOK GOOD IN THIS PIC!' and he asked how much the ticket is for.

HEART EMOJI HEART EMOJI HEART EMOJI ETC. ETC. ETC.

Finally we decided to go and do more than make out in public!! I parked across the street (BTW I asked him if he'd like to drive my sports car but he doesn't know how to drive stick! And he thinks it's sexy that I do! I felt lucky to get a spot at all.  Like the gentleman he always is, he held my hand up the stairs.

I lit a candle I had brought him (OMG he only has one light and it's like fucking daylight and I don't do sex in daylight if I can avoid it LOL) and it was perfect. We immediately started kissing and taking our clothes off just like they do in the movies---practically tearing them off. And my favorite thing he does is pick me up and carry me to the bed. It's so romantic and sexy. He's only got a twin bed LOL so there's not a lot of room but we made the best of it. I wanted to make sure he would lick my pussy bc he didn't the last two dates, so at one point after lots of fucking, I straddled him and just put my pussy in his mouth! Thank God he licked it and it was awesome.

We got tired after a couple hours of fucking (neither of us came) and fell asleep in each other's arms for about two hours. One of us woke up and we just started touching each other and pretty soon he was at full salute and we were fucking again! I love love love love love that and that's why I love spending the night bc I love that dreamy state you're in when you've been asleep and wake up horny for each other! We fucked and fucked but we got tired again and this time we mutually masturbated and I came first, which made him so super turned on, and I told him, "let me know when you're going to cum I'll swallow!" so he did, and I did, and I said 'mmm delicious!" as I melted back into his arms.

I had trouble falling asleep; I'm not used to touching someone while I sleep but I honestly didn't care. I loved being touched by him; he sought ME out all night long. When we'd change position, he'd put his hand on my hip, or put his arm around me and draw me in. Very romantic guy. He's very affectionate.

I was tired but really couldn't sleep. I laid there listening to his nice slow breathing, and once or twice look up at him and watch him sleep. He's so beautiful. The sun was coming up and I could hear other people in the building opening and closing doors and talking, and knew I should leave before I overstayed my welcome.

I loved being in his arms. I feel safe and loved. He opened his eyes and we said good morning and kissed, and I was hoping for another round of fucking but something told me to get going.

It was the sound of scraping---the unmistakable sound of someone shoveling snow.

FUCK! SNOW?!?!?!?!

James said, "yep it must've snowed!" I got up on my knees to look out the window an sure enough, it was a winter wonderland. I couldn't see my car and just saw an empty space where a car used to be and panicked my car had gotten towed. While I was pondering my predicament calmly, James was drinking up looking at my naked body and put his hands on my breasts lovingly and squeezed them. I said, "ooo another round??" and he said something, "I'm gonna save that for next time". I said, "good idea I gotta make sure my car is still there!!!" We laughed and went back under the covers and just snuggled. We both started to fall asleep again and I said, "I don't wanna but I gotta get going!"

I found my clothes scattered all over his floor, and as I was putting on the lingerie-type top I had on he was fascinated with it and was telling me how much he loved it and how good it looked on me! How "great" I always look, I've got "great style" and then he made a joke about our dry cleaner (he thinks it's just amazing we have pick-up and delivery service"). It was cute.

I sat on the edge of the bed to put my heels on and commented it wasn't a great choice for walking in the snow. He laughed and said what I was thinking which was we had no idea it was going to snow and it was really nice out last night!

I gave him a kiss, and he returned it with a deep juicy one, and we said goodbye.

And me and my heels did the walk of shame to my car.

Smiling.

Anna's smitten with a new hottie!

 OMG last night was so awesome!

I had a "first date" with a hottie I had a one-night stand with last weekend! But let me take you back to that night.....I will call him "James".

My hubby and I had Uber'd to Milwaukee and bar-hopped. We were having a blast. And we were getting shit-faced bc we knew we didn't have to drive. I think I was about 5-6 drinks in, and we were in a bar with a live band and they were awesome. When they got offstage we left and walked across the street to another bar. I swear all I remember is walking in the door and seeing this incredible looking guy, and him noticing me as well.

He looked like a dark, long-haired James Franco. Sexy mouth, very straight teeth, blue eyes, about a couple week's growth of beard. He looked about 25 (he's actually 26 hehe). He was dressed so nicely, and he really stood out. His hair cascaded past his shoulders, and it was tousled and sexy. He had a nice dress shirt on, jeans that fit him just nice if you know what I mean, and a dark brown leather jacket. (Does the word "smoldering" come to your mind??) Mmmm well it does me hehe what a fucking hottie.

I swear it was like a scene out of a movie where our eyes met and everything around him was blurry.

All I remember is making a bee-line straight over to him, and he was smiling at me as wide as I was smiling at him. And I remember seeing my hubby stay back as I approached this new hottie. There was just something about him...I can't believe I'm going to say this but it was love at first sight. I have felt that only once in my lifetime, and here I felt it again. It was profound. I felt instantly comfortable with him like I'd known him forever. I took his hand in mine immediately. It felt like a minute had gone by and next thing I know, we'd left the bar and we were walking to his apartment! And it was a nice evening for early November. We walked 1.6 miles haha (I mapped it yesterday!) and I was in stilettos too! It was sooo fun, holding hands and talking and laughing and getting to know one another....and walking and walking and walking! We finally got to his place and went upstairs and just started making out and we took off all our clothes and just fucked. For THREE HOURS!!!!!!! I came four times and he didn't come at all! I was like OMG how does he hold out so long!? We even took a shower together and although my hair ended up a curly tumbleweed, it was so fun. I have never showered with a guy. Soaping up his six-pack abs and getting my breasts caressed with bubbles felt amazing. (Did I forget to mention he's got six-pack abs...?? COULD HE BE ANY MORE PERFECT??)

I was getting sore and it was getting really late. I wanted him to come and knew I needed to get home.

My sense of time was really off, and for some dumb reason (um, Titos??!!) it felt like I'd only been there like an hour and my hubby was texting and I said I was fine and ready to come home could he come get me! He was like, "um, I'm home....." Home is about a 45 min drive. I guess I thought he was still at the bar! Even seeing the time....it was around 3:30 am....I still couldn't grasp that my hubby was "home" home. I tried to get an Uber but my account wasn't working for some reason (I have no idea why not...I have a 4.95 rating....must've been user error haha...) so hubby came to get me.

While we waited we fucked, and when he wrote he was 14 min away, we got dressed, but kept kissing and I was still so turned on by him I didn't let him even zip up his zipper. I put my hand down his pants, found his still hard cock and started rubbing it and he took off those jeans, picked me up and laid me back on his bed and put it right back inside my very-wet pussy. We were all sweaty and fucking hard when my phone chimed and I knew my hubby was outside to get me. We stopped, panting, and laughing, and got dressed again. He had asked me to spend the night but but I said no mostly bc I had never spent the night with any guy. I always just went home. It didn't occur to me to say yes. No one ever asked me to stay before. Thankfully he was turned on and not upset with me at all!

It was a great night. He texted me that night and then again in the morning. Of course, I assumed I'd never see nor hear from him again but happily I was wrong!!!!

The next day he invited me to hang out with some friends of his at some political function he was going to! He's a double-major--poli-sci/pre-law and plans to go to law school. I was like whoa he wants me to meet his friends??? After a one-night stand?? WOW I was so happy! I wanted to go so badly but my hubby said no. I wish I'd gone anyways. I was resentful and angry and vowed never to say no to him ever again. I was very surprised and happy that he texted me every day this week! And asked to see me every single day! This was just what I'd been wanting. Someone as into me as I am them.

We made plans to get together Thursday night (last night). He said he picked out a place for us to hang out and get some drinks and food. I picked him up at his apt--it's a duplex near the college and he got in and it was just magic. We have such crazy chemistry. We said hello and next thing we are kissing madly. Mmmm yummy! He gave me directions as we drove to the bar and he was impressed with my stick-shift driving. lol

It was a super cute bar and we picked a two-top right inside and the server was real sweet and attentive. I noticed every time I spoke, James was smiling and looking right at me. (Could he be as smitten with me as I am with him??) We ordered wings and truffle fries, and we must've sat there for 2 hours. The conversation flowed easily, we talked about everything--his upbringing, his schooling, his dreams, my band, my writing, my kids, religion, politics, food, alcohol pretty much everything. And we'd hold hands, squeeze fingers, touch each other's thighs, and once OH MY GOD no one has ever done this before---what I'm about to tell you sealed the deal for me. My heart is all in.

We were talking and we were very lively, and he was just smiling at me and engrossed in whatever it was I was saying, and then with his hand, he lovingly brushed a wisp of my hair aside and fingered it,
caressing my hair. AS if I needed any prodding!!!  I fell for him right then and there, hook line and sinker as they say.

He'd told me earlier a friend of his was a drummer, and they were going to be playing there! And then this friend texted him he needed a ride, so I said, "sure! Let's go get him!" so we did. His friend was s tall and cute too. He was very friendly and smiled while talking to me, so I hoped he would like me and approve of me dating his friend. When we got back to the bar, the three of us sat at the bar, having beer and laughing and talking. His friend and I talked music and then the rest of the band came over---James introduced me to them and they asked me to come up and sing with them! I said I'd love to!! We discussed what kind of music they play and all and I said that would be super fun absolutely! His friend left to go join them onstage and James and I remained at the bar.

We had another drink and just kept kissing and touching one another, and he said finally, "wanna go?" hahah and I said, "yesssss", so I didn't get to sing. Oh well. I was so turned on I wanted to fuck him so bad. I think he was thinking the same thing ;)

I drove us back to his place, and he again was such a gentleman. Opened the door for me getting out of the car and held my hand up the stairs. Mmmm. We got in and he gave me a little tour again (it's really tiny but so cute bc it's his) and we went to his bedroom and chatted a little--I put on Spotify (30 seconds to mars) and we undressed each other (God how I love that!!), kissed passionately and it wasn't long till he was inside me.

We started on this little couch near his bed, and when I got up to change position, he did something unbelieable---he picked me up, still inside me, fucking me in the air. It was so super hot and fun! Then he carried me over to his bed, still inside me, and laid me down and kept fucking me.

We changed position again, he laid down next to me and turned me sideways and fucked me from behind, but laying down, nibbling on my neck. I was so wet it kept sliding out! I had him lay on his back and I gave him what he called the "best blow job ever"! I said his dick was perfect and it was. Not too long, not too thick, it fit me perfectly in my mouth and my pussy!! Then I climbed on top of him and fucked him. He loves my big titties and held them as I fucked him. I loved the look of ecstasy on his face; and I wanted him to come so badly but he didn't!

I have often said there are two kinds of lovers: there are guys that fuck and guys that make love.

"James" makes love.

He's passionate and gentle and deliberate.

We didn't have as much time together as either of us would've liked as I said I couldn't spend the night (again). It wasn't hubby this time, although he's always ok if I want to spend the night, but we were due for a snowstorm which did hit around 1 am and I made it home by midnight. (woke up to 3 inches of snow on the ground).

Oh! And while we were at the bar, I took a pic of him and his friend, and a couple selfies of him and I. I wanted a pic of us. I sent it to my BFF's and they both said we look like a couple XOXOXOX

He texted me this morning, "thank you for everything last night beautiful".

I. Am. Smitten!!

Someone new...someone older????

Hello my sexy readers! How are you all doing? I'm sorry I haven't written lately. I've had a weird month. We have much catching up to do!

First of all, I went to see Blondie! My hubby encouraged me to go see him. He moved 5 ours up north, and I drove to spend the night with him! The last hour I drove in a terrible snowstorm and was questioning my sanity (and my libido LOL) bc what if I crashed and died up there? How would I explain where I was???

We had a great visit. I should write it all out for you but I just haven't had the time. Let's just say, we still have an amazing connection. We went for a new record but ending up tying the last one LOL he came four times and the sex was GREAT as always. He still hasn't made me cum although he sure tries; whenever I get close he goes and does something different and I'm like, "NO!! KEEP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!" lol I don't say it I just gently move his fingers and try to show him but he has his own ideas about what I might like so yeah, I went for my OWN record and masturbated myself to orgasm with him 3 times. He loved watching so yeah!

The best parts of our night together were two things....we'd been fucking and when we were done I realized my phone was almost dead and my charger was in my car. So we had to get all dressed and go get it. It was snowing hard but it was beautiful--big huge snowflakes coming down like feathers, and it was sooo quiet out. He walked with me to my car, and drew a big heart on my back windshield that said "B + A" (Blondie +Anna, but our real first names) and that was soooo romantic!!! He kissed me with the snow coming down on us and it was sooo romantic!

The other best part was, the next morning, I had to pack up and leave and he said he'd go out and clean all the snow off my car for me  (insert heart emoji!!!) while he did I packed my things. He came back to the room, and it was only 10:15 (I planned on being on the road by 11, when we had to check out of the hotel) and I said, "I don't have to leave for another 45 minutes!!" He smiled that naughty smile and we tore off all our winter clothes and boots as fast as we could and fucked again! It was so hot. We are so hot for each other.

There were a few bad parts though that I don't really want to get into right now, just suffice it to say nothing bad, just I spent enough time to get to know him better, and I honestly didn't like what I saw. It made me realize that sometimes it's best to not take my lovers out in public! He is 25 but acts like he's a 10 year old boy. He drank too much, got rowdy and inappropriate and I thought, "ugh".

And so he fell off his pedestal.

And the next day after I got back from seeing Blondie, I got real sick. Urgent care twice sick. The flu, pneumonia, and finally a sinus infection. Two rounds of antibiotics and fevers of 103-104. I lost two weeks. But what I'm going to tell you next has made it all better.

A week later, on a Sunday night, around 11 pm, I get a PM from a musician I know, an acquaintance. We go back about 5 years. He's the lead singer of one of the most successful bands here and is extremely good looking, great voice, and all the women throw themselves at him. Every performance is filled with women fawning all over him. I've seen his band a few times and I wasn't that impressed for some reason, something I couldn't put my finger on. I know his guitarist better than I know him bc he goes to all our music industry meetings and he's a really nice guy (bald, not my type, but a great person and amazing guitarist).

The only history I have with this hot singer who I'll call Brandon is five years ago was when I first went to see his band. I remember being all dressed and liquored up, with my hot blonde BFF and we were coming out of the bathroom and he walked by. I was instantly smitten and stopped him and said, "are you single?" he said, "maybe!" and we giggled and walked away. The only other time I encountered him was at a music industry convention last January; his band had a booth and so did ours, and with my bandmates we went to say hi. I took a selfie of the two of us, but it was more to brag about having a selfie with this hot, uber successful singer than anything else. I wasn't really attracted to him at this point, there was a super hot drummer I spent most of my time hanging out with instead who's bands' booth was two booths down from Brandon's bands' booth.

So fast forward to that PM four weeks ago....he wrote, "can I ask you a question?" and since he's a realtor by day I assumed it had to do with a question about our house, bc we are in the process of getting it ready to be listed. He said, " it's about a mad passionate love affair". I was like, "WHAT????" I just said, "who's?" real flirty. I was really shocked! Brandon? From THAT BAND LIKES ME????!!! I couldn't believe it! I was like, I've known you for years. Why now?" He said it was the combination of "liquid courage" and me liking his FB post about him going bowling! He'd checked in at a bowling alley and I "liked" the post bc it made me think how much I love bowling and having gone in years! And that's what tipped him over the edge to have the courage to write me. I thought that was so hot. He's wanted me all this time. WOW No one's ever pined for me for that long and then told me.

So we texted back and forth the next day and the next, talking about our marriages (yes, he's married and has three kids), how we "do" non-monogamy and all. He said they had a DADT ("don't ask, don't tell") which I really don't agree with bc it involved lying. I said, "so if you're out on a date with me, what do you tell your wife?" he said that he's out with a friend. Hmm.

So we decided to meet for coffee the following Friday. I was still coughing but feeling much better, and I'd lost 7 pounds and felt more attractive! He had an acoustic show the night before, and another friend of mine asked me to go with her! OF COURSE I SAID YES!!! So we stopped at a different bar and had something to eat and drink, and then ventured over to the bar he was performing at. I looked damn good and I knew it. The ambience in this bar was perfect. My friend and I walked in, and had to walk right past him and his guitarist, which was super embarassing. They were in the middle of a song and we smiled at each other, and we went and sat down on a bench seat next to one another, off to the side, but close. I was so attracted to him I couldn't even look at him. I really couldn't believe he had said the things he had said to me.

The most interesting part is, he's OLDER. Probably in his late 40's. I've never been attracted to anyone even 30! So this was a first for me, and I'm sure it has everything to do with his celebrity. But I'd never really looked at him before.

They finished their first set soon after we sat down and got our first drinks, and he and his guitarist (different from the one in his band) and they both came over to say hi. He hugged my friend first (as he should have, they've been friends for years) and then he came over to hug me. I got up and he hugged me so tightly, then he kissed me a quick kiss (super awkward) and then hugged me again. He didn't want to let go. I was getting so turned on but uncomfortable at the same time! Then he finally let go. He stood opposite me (there was a table between us) and his guitarist was standing opposite my friend, but I honestly couldn't look at him. He's got blue eyes and oh my god dimples. And did I mention HIS MUSCLES??? OMG biceps so huge and rock hard. A sexy tribal tattoo around one of them. And he's such a happy guy, he's always smiling and you can always see those dimples. I was smitten. Finally my friend goes, "PICTURE!!" The guitarist went and sat to my friend's left and Brandon came and sat next to me. He sat THISCLOSE and put his arm around me.

 I could smell him, oh my god he smelled so good, just manly, not a heavy cologne scent. My friend grabbed my phone and I unlocked it, and while she and the guitarist were jostling to get the angle just right, Brandon started caressing my exposed thigh (I was wearing a short dress) with his index finger. Up and down, slowly touching my thigh, and I was going crazy inside. I put my arm around him too for the picture, which they took 5 pics, and I was so drawn to him. I was so turned on. Those dimples. Those muscles. The two vodka tonics I'd had left me uninhibited, and I found my mouth next to his cheek, my lips parted and panting, brushed them against his cheek! Then I was like "OH MY GOD ANNA WHAT ARE YOU DOING???" and stopped myself. The pics got taken, and then they got up and said they were going to go get drinks and go to the bathroom and all before their second set. I cannot stop thinking about that three minutes with him.

But sadly, nothing ever came from it. We've never met up. I'll start a new post bc this one's just getting too long.

Sigh.

Indescribably delicious

I just got home after dropping Blondie off at his apartment.

I have to write this all down so I don't forget anything.

And yes, it was A M A Z I N G.

Sigh.

He's literally loading everything he owns into a small driveable U-Haul as I write this and moving five hours away tomorrow morning.

He's made a mess of his life. He's moving back in with his mom with his proverbial tail between his legs.

Over the course of the last couple of weeks he apparently pissed off his girlfriend, went to Mexico on vacation with a group of friends, then lipped off to his boss which got him fired. Which rendered him homeless, since he worked maintenance at an apartment complex and got a reduced rent there. He had moved out of his old place two months ago to get a bigger place in the same complex with his girlfriend but she (apparently) kicked him out. In addition, he got a DUI in May when he got in a wreck so there's that. So he is jobless and car-less and homeless, and moving in with his mother and his step-dad for "least a year" to get his shit together. "Maybe go back to school".

So he'd announced his plans to move on a Facebook post yesterday (leaving out the "pissing off" everyone part). It must've been shocking to his friends bc last I looked, he'd had about 53 likes and sad faces and hearts and about 25 comments or more from well-wishers. He's made announcements like this before but never with a target date, so I knew he was serious. I also was privy to the fact that he was in a desperate situation bc he'd written me a few days ago asking if I would take his beloved cat while he looked for a place to live. And just as my hubby and I were discussing how we'd make that work, Blondie wrote me he was going to "try to make it work" with his ex-GF and so I wouldn't need to take his kitty after all. Raise me up and drop me, that's Blondie's MO. My BFF said, "what a douche!!!" But I know him better. He's not a douche. He's a hot mess, he doesn't know what he wants and so he's just grabbing onto anything that will stick. He's got a huge heart and hates more than anything to let anyone down, let alone hurt someone, but the truth is, he ends up hurting everyone including himself. He didn't end up with many options I guess.

I knew I had to see him and say goodbye. Five hours away might as well be five states, or five countries away as far as I was concerned. So I wrote him and asked if he was really moving and he responded right away, "yes I am". I told him I had something for him, and he responded by asking me "are YOU the gift??" with a wink emoticon. I couldn't believe it! Was he actually flirting with me?? I mean, this is the guy I've rarely spoken to for over a year because he "can't talk to me anymore". I felt myself getting excited and my hopes up. We messaged back and forth and he finally asked me if I could pick him up at 10 am.

I think you know the answer to that question!!!!

He confirmed this morning around 9:15, which honestly still surprised me, bc he's known for being a super big flake. I gave it less than a 50% chance we'd really see each other today. I expected him to say he had too much to do, blah blah blah, but he didn't.

I was sooo nervous. I looked back on these posts before I left to see when was the last time I'd seen him. Dec. 8, 2016. More than a year ago. And although we're Facebook friends and have had some communication here and there, it's been very infrequent, so seeing him today, let alone having sex with him gave me butterflies! So much time had passed, and yet another girlfriend fiasco.What if I wasn't attracted to him anymore? I had told my BFF that looking at his pics online I felt warm towards him but my lady bits weren't really tingly.

Maybe I just needed to see him in person.

*******

I wanted to chug a couple of vanilla vodka shots but I had to drive. I really could've used some liquid courage. I drove up to his apartment, saw the U-Haul, and parked across from it. And I was just putting the car into gear when I saw him hurrying in the cold to my car, and he got in. We were all smiles. We grabbed each other in a huge bear hug and didn't let go. He looked absolutely the same to me. Super long blonde mane with a black knit hat, those blue eyes behind dorky, broken black glasses that he pointed out to me later he'd super-glued in one spot. A sexy few days' ginger stubble.

Finally we parted, and I said, "I just can't believe you're really sitting here in my car!" He agreed. We talked about how long it had been--I didn't divulge the exact date--but we agreed it had been way too long.

As I drove us back to my house, he told me about his upcoming move, how he got to this point. The remark to his boss (he didn't say what it was), the break-up with the GF (he shared no details) having literally nowhere to go but his mother's, which was not exactly what he had planned for himself. He has the realization that he caused all of this. He is the common denominator. Later on when the opportunity presented itself, I said to him how he must not really want (these things) or he wouldn't sabotage them. He said about us, "we could've gone so far". Um yep we could have Blondie. You stopped it. NOT me.

On the drive to my house he commented on my cute car, how it's "so me". I currently have reindeer antlers in the windows and a red puffy "nose" on the hood grill, and I was telling him I should design  Minnie Mouse ears for each window and a red bow for the hood. He smiled and said, "you so should!!!!" and then he got quiet and I looked at him again, and he said, "I tried to be your Mickey".

LUMP IN THROAT!!!!!! WHAT DID HE JUST SAY????!!!!! HE TRIED TO BE MY MICKEY??!
WHAT DID THIS MEAN????!! OH MY GOD!!

I couldn't even react. I didn't say anything. The words just hung in the air as if they were big fluffy snowflakes drifting sideways. I took his hand in mine and squeezed it. I felt an electric shock go through me.

Finally I pulled my car into my garage, and he went bounding into the house like a puppy. He kicked off his shoes and my dog ran over to him to say hi. He excitedly said his name and gave my dog affection. Then he saw one of my cats on the back of the couch, went over to her and addressed her by name too, and pet her lovingly. He remembered their names. I thought that was sweet.

It was a little awkward, and I honestly wasn't sure he wanted sex! Nor did I! I had my guard up. I didn't want to start liking him too much again. I was so glad how I really had gotten over him completely. Well, maybe I hadn't, because I'm the one that reached out to HIM to "say goodbye".

I mostly felt a longing for him. I was excited but sad at the same time, because so much time had passed, and he was moving! It was almost like, "why are we doing this? What's the point??" The chemistry was definitely very much there.He seemed very distracted by his thoughts, moving and all, so I started with asking him if I could get him anything. He said he was fine. I had a few things I had gotten him (souvenirs) I'd never given him so I suggested we go into the kitchen and I gave them to him. I told him laughingly that it seemed every time I'd gotten him something, he would write me and say he couldn't talk to me bc he had this new GF so it seemed they were bad luck charms! His face got sad and he looked down and said, "I'm so sorry", and I said lightly, "that's ok". I made a joke of it. He loved them though. He seemed very moved.

I told him how I noticed in his Facebook pics of his trip to Mexico, he's wearing the tank top I got him so long ago. He said excitedly, "That's my favorite shirt!!!" We both beamed.

We awkwardly stood in the kitchen looking at each other, smiling, and he was kind of floating and twirling around, and I finally said, "what do you want to do?" He said, "ANYTHING!! I'm up for anything!" and he came over and hugged me tightly, and I felt his hard dick pressed up against me as he held me. He pulled away slightly and began to kiss me deeply. Mmmm it was delish. Then he let go and skipped down the hall towards the staircase, and pointed up with a devilish grin, his eyebrows asking me, "can we go up here??" I laughed and followed him. I reminded him of when he was on crutches and leapt up and down them previously. He smiled at the memory and said, "oh YEAH!!! I REMEMBER THAT!!!" He stopped at the top of the stairs to pet my other cat, and it was so cute how he remembered his name too.

He made a bee-line into my bedroom next, and plopped himself down on my bed like he owned it. Fully clothed. I said I had to get the ambiance "just right" and he joked, "ABSOLUTELY!!" I lit a candle and looked for a playlist on my phone, and turned on the bluetooth speaker. I told him how I was going to buy him tickets to his favorite group Odesa for his birthday but he went back to his girlfriend so I didn't buy them. He said, "oh my god were you going to take me??" I said, "Of course! They were playing in Madison the day before your birthday!" He put his arm across his face and said, "oh my god, wow, really? sigh". Yep Blondie, you missed out.

He beckoned me, "come over here!" and I obeyed. I laid down next to him; he put his arms around me and just hugged me again. So tightly. And hugging led to kissing, and next his hand was slowly caressing my leg, my butt, my back, every part of me. Like I was a Ferrari, you know? Have you ever touched a Ferrari?? You stroke it gently, lovingly, not wanting to scratch it. It's the most unbelievable thing you've ever seen and can't believe you're touching it. Every inch of it is a miraculous thing to behold. That's how I felt. Like a prized luxury car.

Or a Queen.

Somehow I managed to squeeze in saying, "Groping through clothes is the best! don't you think?" And he purred in agreement and kept on touching me, till finally all I wanted to do was rip our clothes off. So that's what we did ;) Blondie unzipped his pants and pulled them down to show me his welcoming big, thick stiff dick and smiled. I swiveled around and took off my socks one-by-one, my leggings, and then my top and just had on a matching silver bra and thong. He pulled off his sweater and shirt and voila, there was a fully naked Blondie in my bed. I told him I just couldn't believe he was there. He said softly, "me neither!", and everything accelerated from there...

He was passionate without being grabby. I'd forgotten what a great lover he is, and I mean specifically in that way. He's very passionate, not grabby at all, in fact, he is SO not goal-oriented at all. I feel like he makes love, not "has sex" with me. Everything that happens is organic. He doesn't really talk except to moan or say my name as he's moaning. One time I was on top of him and he was fucking me hard from underneath him, and he slowed himself down and told me, "close your eyes. I want you to FEEL ME." and I did. And once again he said it, "feel me". And as soon as I let myself feel him with my eyes closed, I burst into tears. I was feeling too much. I made myself stop as quickly as I could so he wouldn't see.

After that amazing move, he moved me gently off of him and laid my down next to him, spooning. He caressed my body and his hand moved down to insert his fingers into my vagina and I swear he got me really turned on that way. Like everything else he does, it was slow and sensual. I loved it. Some guys just jam their fingers in you and think you like that (insert laughing-till-crying emoji here). He doesn't do that. He's gentle. It's like he caresses the outside of my pussy while he's putting them inside all at the same time. It feels amazing. And he doesn't "feel around in there" like he's looking for a lost penny. (Why do guys do that???) I wish I could tell him all this!

He flipped me over and fucked me hard on top. I loved the eye contact. That's the best. So intense. I hate when guys have their eyes closed more than they're looking at you bc otherwise it feels like they're just fantasizing about some other chick (or porn) while I'm the one who's naked. He would fuck me hard and as he did, that long blonde mane would hang down and I'd grab it and pull on it, or brush it out of his face. And my favorite is when he'd flip it himself out of the way. Just like a fucking sexy caveman. GRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!! I ordered him, "FUCK ME BLONDIE!! FUCK ME HARD!!!' He brought out the animal in me.

I straddled him and climbed on him so that I put my pussy right in his face. He ate me out appreciatively, and I then moved down and "tittie-fucked" him. He said he'd never done that before! I thought about his ex-girlfriends' A-cup tits and said, "you gotta have big ones for it!" LOL I rubbed my pussy on his thigh and told him I was going to dry-hump him and we were both going to cum like that. We almost did. Almost. It was naughty and fun.

Then I just gave him the royal treatment. I licked him up and down slowly and gently, avoiding his dick, up and around his balls, the inside of his thighs, his tummy, and stroked him gently with my hands while he laid there alternatively watching and not, his eyes closed in ecstasy. He moaned my name over and over. Finally I took his dick in my mouth and teased the tip, making it super wet with my saliva. He squirmed in delight and grabbed me by my hair and pulled it hard, pulling me on top of him, sticking that big fat cock of his inside me and fucking me so hard he came. I loved it when he said, "omg (my name) I'm coming" with that orgasmic "O" face. What's more fun than seeing THAT??!!

Another thing I love about sex with Blondie is he stays rock hard after he comes, and we just keep fucking. We don't stop. Usually he comes again within minutes, but this time he didn't. He slowed down and I felt him pull himself out, his hands on my torso, and he laid me gently down next to him. I got up and got us a towel, and he was smiling and saying, "OH MY GODDDD" over and over. Then he said, "Come back", and reached for me and held me. I wanted to keep it light so at some point I said, "do you remember the jalapeno incident??" And he laughed so loud and hard. "YESSSS!!!! OH MY GOD!!" We both laughed.

His dick was still straight up in the air like a ruler and I was still super turned on. He asked me to keep touching it (my pleasure!!! LOL) and I dribbled a little bit of lube on it and he purred, "mmm perfect" and we touched it together. I was so ready to keep fucking. I still hadn't come. I got so close so many times but I hadn't. We laid there playing with his cock for a little while, then unfortunately, he took our hands off and apologized for stopping. He said he was "distracted" by all the stuff he has to do, and he's also emotional about the move and all. Would I just hold him? ("consolation prize") LOL

It was all good though, because we talked. And he said some amazing things to me. He said he felt like we have such a strong connection, he feels we will always see each other again. I agreed. I said, "I now have total faith that I will see you again." And I do. And then I took a risk and said, "you know, I don't even really get jealous when you have a girlfriend bc I want you to be happy. I just hate that you cut me out when you do. Because I'm your friend first." He said, "I know, I'm sorry". I said, "you know Blondie, there are girls out there who will understand. You just have to know what you want and tell them." He said, "I know, I know." I felt like I was lecturing him but I had to get it out. This was my last chance. I said further, "you've gone through how many girlfriends now and look at us! Even when you have a girlfriend we still have that connection Blondie!" He was holding me as we were talking, naked and warm, and it was intense and emotional. "I know! I know!" he agreed. "you're so right!" So I said, "you can have both. You just have to know what you want and ask for it." I wanted him to know it IS possible. We laid there, just holding each other. I said, "that's what I have. We have a great marriage" then realized I needed to lighten up and said, "everyone should be like this because it's so awesome!" We laughed and he kissed me and snuggled me to let me know everything was all right. It was perfect.

He said he was hungry and was craving "Arby's". Said he saw it on the way over and so we decided we'd get it for him, so after a bit I proclaimed, "let's go!". He looked at me like he was making mental note of my face, the way you see them do in the movies when that person knows they're never going to see you again. I melted and said, "one last naked hug! Because naked hugs are the BEST!!!" and that's what we did. We held each other, neither wanting to let go. And then it occurred to me, 'TAKE A FUCKING PICTURE ANNA!!!!" And he's always let me take lots of pics so I said, "Selfie???" and he said, "sure!!!" So I took two selfie pics of us "for posterity". He trust me completely.

We kissed, then got up and dressed, and he was done first and wandered into my bathroom and just looked around. He saw the Minnie Mouse framed pic he'd given me and commented on it. He said, "You ARE Minnie" with a smile. We went downstairs and he gave a look around like it was the last time he'd ever see it, and we left. He took my hand and didn't want to let go; he intertwined his fingers with mine and since I have a stick shift, I was driving with my left hand and taking it off the wheel to shift with it. So we didn't have to let go. I commented, "I've never done this! It's tricky!" but his face was calm like he was just feeling it all, not like I was doing anything as extraordinary as this. I loved how he just didn't want to let go.

We didn't unlink our hands until we stopped at Arby's, and he fed me curly fries all the way to his apartment. One time I bit his finger and he smiled, and once he left his finger in my mouth for me to suck it. It was so hot! We joked and laughed about nothing I can remember now, but it was awesome. Like we were on a date--one of the dates we'd never gotten to go on.

When I licked his fingers, I told him it reminded me of how much I miss him cooking for me. I said, "I loved it when you took a piece of the chicken and licked off the sauce and fed it to your kitty. I thought that was the sweetest thing I'd ever seen." He said, "aw, well he's a great cat." I just smiled.

We finally got to his apartment building and saw the U-Haul again. I thought he said, "come in for a bit" and I was excited! I said, "I get to say goodbye to your kitty??" He said, "oh no, he's not here. He's at my co-worker's where I've been staying the last few days." I said, "Oh! Awww" sadly. I followed him to the U-Haul where he opened up the door, put in the bag of food and the bag of souvenirs I'd gotten him, and he turned and faced me and said, "this is it!"  He said something about having to go see his ex-co-worker who he was living with; he was going to get him so he could help him move more of his things. "Oh", I said, a little deflated bc I'd apparently misunderstood him. He just stared at me, and I smiled and said, "well best of luck Blondie, drive safe, keep in touch" and he said, "I will Anna, I will". We kissed a deep longing kiss, parted, and he said, "thank you for everything Anna. I appreciate you so much". I said, stupidly, "thank YOU honey" and felt instantly stupid and like "what the fuck did I say honey for???" I went up on my tip toes and kissed him again, and I turned and walked to my car.

I got in and as I put the car in gear, I saw him drive past me on the street, not looking back.

A new look and Anna gets riled up!

Hello you sexy readers out there ;)

I've been thinking about my blog a lot and love love love when I hear from you! Someone pointed out to me that my blog name really wasn't accurate, in that I'm not a swinger (anymore). I couldn't argue with that fact! When I first started this blog in February 2010, my husband and I WERE swingers, so, hence the name, "Diary of a Swinging Housewife". Also, the blog domain name, "We-Swing" is no longer accurate, as a loyal follower pointed out to me. I am grateful for him and today I changed it to better reflect the journey from swinging married couple to ethical non-monogamy. I'm still not sure about the title; it may change again but I do feel like my experiences are leading me to a much wiser position as someone who has been around the block SO many times, I want to teach and lead you all to a better sex life as well as happier, more authentic and fulfilling relationships with your SO's.

Most of my blog posts are experiences I've had but there are posts that are informational such as this favorite of mine

https://naughtyannasguidetogreatsex.blogspot.com/2016/12/is-your-pussy-dry-heres-why.html


In the last seven years, I've posted 209 posts. That's insane! Looking over my blog with the proverbial fine-tooth-comb, I realize that I've shared my heart and soul with you all. I share things with you I wouldn't dare share with anyone who actually knows me. That's how special you all are! Do you realize that?? You, my dear readers, are less judgmental and more accepting of me than family and friends. This fact does bother me on a regular basis, as I wish so much that I could be more authentic myself. Sex is everyone's favorite topic. It's in the news constantly, especially lately with all the allegations of sexual misconduct by all these famous people. If sex is our favorite topic, why do I have to hide behind a pseudonym?? It's for the very reason that in our society, unless you're having vanilla monogamous sex behind closed doors, discreet and un-discussed, you're a freak, you're a sexual deviant, and there's something wrong with you, and you are a threat to society. We use the word "slut" with a wink and a chuckle, because we don't label a woman who enjoys sex without procreation as a negative, but the rest of the world still does, very unfortunately.

Look how white men have tried, and continue to try, to control women's sexuality. Take away our birth control, our rights to abortion, our rights to control our own bodies. The right-wing evangelicals are a threat to our well-being, and yet, here's another one, Judge Roy Moore, who couldn't be more misogynistic and homophobic if he tried, accused by no less than five women now of having had inappropriate conduct with him when they were teenagers. Of course he vehemently denies it! Did anyone think Roy Moore was a decent human being?????

He's really just a metaphor for the whole middle-aged white men, right-wing evangelical movement. I certainly didn't vote for Trump or any of his cronies, because I knew this was where his presidency would go.

I apologize to any middle-aged white men who aren't in that category. I know if you're a reader of my blog you don't subscribe to that mind-set at all. But isn't it interesting that only middle-aged white men are in the so-called "moral majority"??? Do you see any African-Americans in there? Sadly there are a few white women who rally alongside this cluster-fuck of an administration. There's KellyAnne Conway, who someday is going to wake up and realize she's sold her soul to the devil.

We can't go back people. We can't go back to the days of treating women as second-class citizens. How we ever got a president who admitted to just "grab them by the pussy" is beyond me. And now he's overturned Obama's federal protection of African elephants.

Is nothing sacred anymore??????

Sigh.

Well, I will continue to write about sex and enough of the politics. I am a staunch feminist but not the man-hating kind, and I'm not a lesbian. Like I wrote, I love men, I love all kinds of men and I truly believe if more men embrace their feminine side and stand up for the women in their lives, we can overcome gender tyranny. Everyone wins!!!!

It's Friday, go out and get some--bring your lube and wear your condoms but make sure it's consensual!!!!!!!

Love always,

Anna XOXOX

Eskimo Tinder hottie too hot to handle

This has been a strange week. The next day after my date from hell with Gorilla Man, I went back on Tinder (of course :) ) and I matched with a real hottie--long, straight caveman hair, slender build, kind of Eskimo features---high cheekbones and perfect skin. Wow. I wanted in his igloo bad. We began messaging and soon he asked for my Snapchat which I liked bc it lets me know right away if they're the real deal. Do they look like their profile pics?? Snapchat weeds them out.

Well he looked EXACTLY like his profile pics. He was truly one of the most beautiful men I'd ever laid eyes on. I sent a selfie back with a cute heart filter. He was just what my bruised ego needed.

UNTIL.....

Moments later, my snapchat was flooded with maybe 10 pics he'd sent from his camera roll. Various full body pics, mostly nudes. He was beautiful, no doubt, but fuck! Nudes already??! I barely just "met" you!! So I wrote him, "slow down cowboy, you're going too fast for me."

And guess what he did??

He deleted me!! And he removed me from his Tinder!!! I laughed so hard. All I could think was, "really?? REALLY??!!

I sure attract crazies don't I???

Tinder date from hell

So I matched with a real cutie about 2 weeks ago. Very cute, blue-eyed recent college grad, 23-years-old, lives 8 miles from me. We hit it off right away, and we moved from texting soley on Tinder to Snapchatting and texting quickly. He would write me 24/7, from early morning while getting ready for work to bedtime every night. It has been wonderful. We wanted to meet but I was going out of town so that delayed it.

I really liked his sense of humor, and his self-deprecating wit. I can't stand insecure guys who just boast about themselves or have a slew of selfies on their profiles. This guy and I had the most fun banter I've had with a guy for a long time, and after Hot Lips (who btw disappeared and hasn't been heard from since with the exception of one very sexy full body naked pic a week later) I decided I was going to go slower with the next hottie and develop something more before I jumped into bed with them.

So things were progressing beautifully with the guy above I nicknamed "Gorilla Man" bc he was the hairiest beast I've ever seen. And if you read my blogs you know I like my guys hair-free for the most part (except the top of their head. Gotta have cave-man hair). Even though he was so young, he said he too was looking for a relationship, and didn't care that I was married and he'd be a side-dish. We talked at length about what kind of a relationship we both wanted, I mean, in 2 weeks we covered a lot of bases. It wasn't mostly sexual bc when he'd get sexual I'd stop him and say it was too soon for that. He liked it. He told me he had a huge crush on me and couldn't wait to meet me. He'd send me snapchats off and on all day too, letting me in more every day. Oh, and he was a chess player, so that turned me on more than those blue eyes.

So we finally chose a day and time to meet--I picked the place--a super cute and quiet coffee house halfway between where we both lived, and we'd play chess. We'd been teasing one another back and forth for days who was going to win. I brought one of my chess sets, and at the last minute, I decided to leave it in the car. I told him I only had an hour (I had a dr appt) so I decided I just wanted to focus on him as it was our first time meeting.

I labored what to wear since the weather turned so cold. I chose a low-cut, blue sundress and leather jacket and my best Guess black leather boots. I felt pretty and confident and since he was so funny in texting I knew I was probably going to really like him. I told myself I would let him kiss me if he walked me to my car. THAT'S how much I liked him already.

So you know from the title that things turned bad, so here it goes.

I got there before him, and sat down. I was nervous and didn't know what to do. I texted him "here!" and soon he wrote, "I'm ordering coffee!" I somehow didn't see him come in. I recognized him immediately. He looked just like all his pics. He was cute and wearing a nice cashmere sweater and jeans. There was one person in line behind him, and I didn't have a coffee yet, and he was already paying so he couldn't order one for me, so feeling playful, I went up behind him and put my hands on his back and said, "HI! I didn't see you come in!!!" He turned around and I think he smiled and said hi and asked where I was sitting. I said I hadn't really picked a place yet. He said "ok" and something about going to find a spot. I said "Okay!" It was at the moment that I realized he was super short (I mean I'm five foot two and maybe five-five in my boots) and he kind of looked.....dwarfish??!! He turned the corner and I hadn't had a good look at him, so I thought, maybe not.

A little discombobulated, I ordered my coffee and decided to give him a chance. I absolutely adored his personality. I was going slow these days after all. I texted my hubby, "He's here. He's cute."

I found him sitting at a cute two-top table off to the side, nice and private, and I smiled and said, "Well hi there!! Nice to meet you!" and sat down. He made eye contact, and he was real cute, as cute as he'd looked in all those Snapchat pics he'd sent. I was actually not too nervous once we got settled.

Within a minute or so he took off the cashmere sweater he was wearing as the coffee house was plenty warm. He joked he was a "T-shirt and jeans" kind of guy, and I could see his hairy chest and I was kind of turned on. He had nice muscled biceps too, and he kind of gave off an Alpha male presence that was super hot.

I noticed he was wearing an Apple watch, and seeing as I love my Fitbit Blaze and have been wanting an Apple watch since last Christmas, I asked him about it. I think it caught my eye bc he kept glancing at it. I get that since my Fitbit Blaze sends me all my texts and phone calls, FB messenger and Snapchats. (it would send Tinder too if I let it). He did make conversation, and I felt it was going well. It was like we picked up where we left off through texting. We were laughing and getting along well.

About maybe 10 minutes in, he looks at his Apple watch again, then picks up his phone, and asks me a strange question. He said, "What's it called, the person who's the brother of your grandpa?" I said, "That would be your grand uncle I believe". He responded with a "hmmm", hand on chin, deep in thought. "He died today", he said nonchalantly. "Oh wow! I'm sorry to hear that!" I responded. He let it go for a minute and asked me about my band, like how often we gig and all that and we joked about singing (he said he's a horrible singer) and it was great banter. Then he picked up his phone and said, "would you mind if I call my mom real quick? I'll be right back." What was I to say? "sure, of course" I said nicely, bewildered.

He got up, phone to his ear, and walked around me and out. My phone was on silent in my purse. I reached in and took it out and wrote my hubby, "This is a weird date...not super attracted." I quickly became  annoyed that he got up to make a phone call. Who was he, the President??  I wrote my BFF and told her how he got up to go call his mom.

Suddenly, he popped around the corner, grabbed his sweater, and without missing a beat, said, "I don't mean to be rude but I gotta go!" and he was gone.

I didn't even have a chance to say anything or react. I was just dumbfounded.

I got up and put my jacket on, and went to my car. Trusting and believing him, I wrote, "I'm sorry for your loss. Hope you're ok." He wrote right back, saying simply, "I'm okay. Just worried about my mama." I responded, "It was weird I wasn't sure if you were just giving me a story so you could leave."

He didn't respond. The text turned green (iPhone-to-iPhone texts are blue unless there's no signal) and it appeared he'd never read it. The evening progressed and still no response. Bedtime, still nothing. And this is from the guy who had been texting me 24/7. Such a cavernous difference.

That night I became so incensed I couldn't sleep. I woke up around 5 am just fuming. Finally at 6:43 I texted him, "is that what you did????" He responded immediately, with a screenshot of the text. It was a group text sent from his mom to him and his sister, and says, "Uncle Charles died this morning. This was Daddy's brother. He was only 10 months younger than daddy." There's no date or time on it. For all I know he edited it out. He texted, "I wouldn't quite call this a story." I responded, "well I'm sorry for your loss. But you can't blame me for thinking you just wanted to run out. It's a classic move. Ten minutes into the date a text arrives and you need to leave."

He read it immediately and I've never heard from him since.

I bit my tongue and fingers from typing further, "This is where you say, oh my god I'm so sorry I can totally see how you'd think that. Let me make it up to you." He never did.

So the more I thought about it, the more incensed I became. First of all, who reads their mom's texts while on a date?? Ten minutes in?? If you want to read your fucking texts at least excuse yourself to use the restroom and do it discreetly. Anyone who knows me knows I'm fucking addicted to my phone, yet I had it on silent and stuffed in my purse so I could give him 100% of my attention. And yes, my Fitbit Blaze buzzed a few times so I knew I was getting texts. I was on a date! I didn't look at them. They could wait!! I expect the same from the person I'm with.

Second of all, he shouldn't have sent me that text from his mom, because it just further reveals he DID intend to run out and he used her text as an excuse. She sure didn't seem as upset as he made her out to be, nor was there any emergency of any kind. He created one so he could leave.

Why??? Who knows. I don't care. I deleted him from my Snapchat. I have zero interest in finding out the answer. If he's indignant that I ought to be more sympathetic to his loss he can go fuck himself. It's not like it was a parent or child. It was NOT an emergency, his mother was NOT that upset. He shouldn't have looked at his phone in the first place.

Ugh. Two weeks of wasted time.  I guess this is what dating is.

I'm SO glad I never sent him any nudes.

I walk away from this with my head held high, and all my dignity.

What an ass.

Readers?? Tell me what you think.

Hotel fun with a new Tinder hottie!

Friday night was AMAZING.

For the last two weeks, a hottie I'll call Hot Lips I matched with on Tinder had been snapchatting me literally 24/7. First thing in the morning and last thing at night. Always a selfie pic, he'd send me all day long while he was at work and it would taper off in the evenings, but he always said "goodnight beautiful" and "good morning beautiful." I loved it. He's 23, a semi-pro baseball player and super good looking. Blue eyes, lots of muscles, big full lips and a beautiful smile. A very happy-go-lucky guy, not a depressed, moody one like New Guy or Rocker Boy finally!! He seemed to be the kind of person who was just what I'm looking for. He was sweet, super-complimentary (which I love) and never expected anything in return. Truly, a very nice guy overall. I def hit the jackpot.

He was very respectful too and asked before sending any nude pics, and I love that. I was quickly smitten.

We wanted to meet ASAP. And lo and behold, I was telling my hubby I needed a getaway. A night in a nice hotel, a good night's sleep, and no cats climbing on me or kids. The weather was shitty-five straight days in a row of misty rain, wind and cold. So we booked a room at a 5-star hotel and settled in for a nice dinner.

I was also texting another hottie while we were sitting at the bar later after dinner, but it was Hot Lips who was on his way. I was SO excited to meet him. After two weeks of 24/7 snapchatting I liked him a lot. He was very sweet, very complimentary and just a real nice guy. (whoops! I already said that!!)

The plan was for my hubby to stay in the bar while I took him to our room. And that's what we did.

Hot Lips texted me, "where are you? I'm here!" LOL somehow we missed each other when he entered the lobby. I wrote back I was in the front of the lobby and all of a sudden there he was! He was even cuter in person. I'm all about cute. Ballcap, plaid button-down shirt, khakis. Those big blue eyes and full lips and a huge smile. We embraced in a big hug and I was already giggly. I get that way when I'm super excited. We sat down on the overstuffed leather couch that was there and chatted for about ten minutes. I was a lil drunkie and super giggly. I felt so comfortable with him, and we really clicked. I felt like I'd known him forever, there was just an ease about him that was tangible. I could tell he really liked me too.

I don't remember saying it, but next thing I knew we were in the elevator! I really shouldn't drink so much bc I have trouble remembering details and that really bugs me. The next thing i remember is him sliding my spaghett straps off my shoulders so elegantly, and he began kissing my breasts and sucking my nipples. And we kissed. Those lips!! He was a gentle wet kisser, and it was sweet--he wasn't like a vacuum cleaner sucking the air out of me. He was very gentle in everything he did, but he was very Alpha male and I loved it. He took charge and he was so good and flawless he set a new bar for sex for me!

I remember him untying my shoes. I was wearing a pair of Sam Edelman's that are beige suede and like ballerina shoes, they have long ties that tie around my ankles. It was so sexy watching him untie them for me and slip them off my feet.

He then took my dress and pulled it down and slid it off me, and next, gently slid my panties off. And subsequently, buried his head between my legs. It was yummy yummy yummy. He then licked me up my body up to my breasts again, and kissed me passionately. I loved loved loved how he took charge. He was the man and I was his woman. But his moves weren't aggressive at all but rather almost choreographed they were so flawless. I could tell he was really into me.

I loved watching him undress. I don't think I helped him, which is odd bc it's one of my favorite things to do in the entire world! A new man to undress like the biggest gift behind the Christmas tree! I think he just wanted his clothes off and next thing I knew, he was big and warm and naked and embracing me. His dick was straight out and super hard.

He gently took my legs and spread them and entered me, kissing me passionately. Not pulling out, he swung my legs over like a pretzel and fucked me hard. It felt amazing. He's a big guy, not skinny and small like Jordan or Rocker Boy, more like Blondie. Not fat but big--he's a baseball player and full of muscles but not ripped ya know? (I hate ripped). He was strong and young and solid and oh so sexy.

He'd pull out and change positions, each time taking charge and moving my body the way he wanted to fuck me. Me on top, him on top, him behind me, my legs in the air, you name it, we did it. I sucked his dick and he licked my pussy. It felt like we were so hungry for one another.

I'm happy to report that he made me cum!! I almost never cum with anyone but my husband bc if their technique is too hard (Rocker Boy) or they give up too soon (all of them) but Hot Lips was THE BEST I'VE EVER HAD. (next to hubby). He fingered me and thank GOD didn't shove his fingers in me. I absolutely hate when guys do that. I don't mind a fun exploration into my pussy but when they shove their fingers in like they're eating frosting out of a can it's painful and not at all pleasant. He didn't do that at all!!! He actually was stroking me with the right amount of pressure and his fingers were just to the left of where I wanted them to be. I moved them with my hand and BOOM!!!!! HUGE ORGASM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!! As I screamed in ecstasy I clutched him tightly and he basked in my glory. He was watching me and smiling and I thanked him with a giggle and he passionately kissed me.

Then it was his turn.

I loved that when he came, it was in a position where he could see my face. I hate how Abercrombie always had to cum doggy style. Nothing says "you're as special as a glory hole" like cumming doggy style. It's ok if it's a sometimes-thing but always??? That's why I lost interest in him. Yuk. Left me feeling so used.

Hot Lips was not only facing me but kissing me as he came. He was on the bottom, or should I say on his side, his arms totally around me like an embrace, and my legs were in the air. He finally came, and it was interesting bc he literally made almost no sound at all, it was almost like an "ahhhhh". Not at all like me when he made ME cum! I just wanted to fall asleep with him, our bodies still wrapped up together. But I remembered my husband was downstairs waiting for us to finish so he could come up and get his creampie. Hot Lips wanted to spend the night, and I wanted him to also. But how could I do that with my husband there?? I couldn't. I had to lie and make up an excuse that I wasn't spending the night, that I just got the room to meet up with him.

Yeah, like people do that LOL well Hotel 6 they do, not five-star hotels. I'm sure that looked and sounded ridic.

I had no idea how long we were at it, but I was guessing at least an hour (hubby later said hour and a half!). He got up and went to the bathroom, with the door open!! I wanted to watch SO BADLY but I thought I shouldn't. Because I'd get horny all over again and that wouldn't be fair to my hubby!! I wanted to fuck Hot Lips all night. I didn't want him to go. And I liked that he wanted to spend the night too. Oh well. Maybe next time we both said.

He had Uber'd there and I asked him if he had called for a car. He said he hadn't yet but was going to. He got dressed--I grabbed a super cute short-tight burgundy lace see-through nightgown I had brought and put it on. We kissed goodbye, and he left. I texted my hubby and he was up lickety-split in no time! I asked him if he saw him leave, and he said he did, that he thought he was real cute.

My hubby's dick was hard and ready. He licked me first and then fucked me fast and hard and he was done. He'd been downstairs knowing I was fucking this young guy and he couldn't hold back another second. Unlike Hot Lips, he came so loudly I'm sure anyone could've heard. We laughed and fell soundly asleep.

What a fun night!!!

Boring night turns exciting

Traveling alone can be so much naughty fun! I got into some mischief this week doing just that.

I was in California last week visiting my elderly father and extended family, staying at a very nice hotel, the kind that has a Starbucks in the lobby, valet and room service 24/7. My kind of accommodations. I had spent the day with my dad and one of my brothers, a somewhat exhausting day of errands and I'd set up a cell phone and Netflix on my dad's television. Not being very good with wires and cable connectors I nevertheless got it all connected and working. I left his house around 9 pm when I saw my dad start yawning and drove the 15 minutes to my hotel. The night was young and I wanted to have some fun.

I'd been snapchatting a hottie I matched with on Tinder from LA off and on; a cute 24 year old who resembled Zacky Vengeance from the band Avenged Sevenfold. Black hair, blue eyes, lots of muscles, a guitairst. We'd almost hooked up in March when I visited last but it didn't happen. I didn't forget him, and once I had a plane ticket, I let him know I'd be coming and wanted to see him.

I went to my room, took a shower and freshened up. I put on a sexy off-white spaghetti-strapped cocktail dress and stilettos. No bra. I took the elevator down to the hotel bar, which thankfully was booming with attractive young people in various suits and dresses. A convention possibly?? I sat down at the only available bar stool. To my right was a somewhat frumpy couple in their 50's, and they were arguing, and to my left were two white executives in the 60's. I felt the eyes turn to me as I ordered a glass of Cabernet. The bartender was acting like Frankenstein--his eyes glazed as if he were a homeless man presented with an entire Thanksgiving dinner. It made me uncomfortable. The TV's that were on were all sports and not much to look at, and I didn't want to just stare into my phone. The guy I was snapchatting wasn't going to make it after all, so I was back to square one.

The older executives made small talk to me and they were actually quite funny. Thankfully they weren't flirting, and soon left. Two guy took their spots--a guy in cargo shorts, a black T-shirt and ball cap, and next to me, a very good-looking guy in expensive jeans, boat shoes, and a button-down shirt missing the cufflinks. He had blonde short cropped hair and plopped down on the bar stool with  his back to me, facing his friend. He sat with one leg crossing the other in a very open swagger that let me know he was hot-to-trot.

His friend must've said something to him about me because it wasn't five seconds later he twirled around and said a 'helloooooooo" that was as cliche and hilarious as they come. He was already tipsy and was drinking a mojito. I glanced at his friend and he had a sort of embarrassed wing-man face. Sort of like, "oy vay, here we go again". I chuckled to myself and knew that this was going to be entertaining.

He was a bit of a goofball; he was over-the-top enamored of me and I was enjoying the attention mainly because he was very good-looking. I could tell he had money by the way he was dressed. He was very alpha male, which I have to say alternately turns me on and turns me off. I like my men effeminate and he really wasn't, but he was very cute. He had dimples and blue eyes and didn't talk "at" me but "to" me. And I really had nothing better to do than sit alone in my room and I wanted something more than that.

He gave me all his attention. I learned he was 38 (old for me!! LOL) and a divorced dad with a 12 year old son he'd brought along with his friend who was also divorced with a 12 year old son. They lived in Canada (I don't remember where) and they came to take their boys to Disneyland. I asked, "where's your boys?" He answered they were up in their room playing video games. He asked if I was alone and I said yes. He saw my wedding ring and asked, "you're married?" I answered, "yes", and he let my answer just hang there. No other questions.

As I sipped my wine (I got a refill from Frankenstein) this handsome hottie was making an obvious play for me. Two or three times he'd be saying something and then playfully insert "and your room number is....???" To which I'd say, "I'm not giving you my room number!" He loved the game, the chase, and so did I. I was having fun.

I've honestly never been hit on.

Mostly because everywhere I go, I'm with my husband. We go out a lot but we're always together. This was really the first time I'd been in a bar and gotten hit on.. I'm severely out of practice, but I was learning as it was happening.

Mostly, I knew that as much as I liked this hottie I'll call Canada, he was not getting in my bed. And the harder he tried, the more fun it was to keep saying no.

The TV's had on all the sports highlights, and it just so happened that the Packers had won earlier in the day, so we talked about that. About how I live in Wisconsin. He called me a Cheesehead and we joked about his Canadian accent.  He asked for my room number again and when I said I wasn't going to give it to him, he admitted that he'd tried with a couple of women at a nearby table he pointed out to me. That was all it took for me to cement my stand that he wasn't going to get anywhere with me. What a turnoff! He was just a guy looking to get laid and wasn't too choosy. He saw me as little more than a conquest. And he apparently knew he was hot and that was both annoying, and yes, hot.

I did like him but was not going to let him have me that easily. He was very charming.  I'd decided I would let him kiss me eventually. He really wasn't my type at all--like I said, I like rocker types and men on the effeminate side, but he was really fun. We were laughing and getting along well. And again, I had nothing better to do.

I'd finished my second glass of wine, and I was thinking about what would be fun with him. I remembered that the hotel's rooftop pool was nicely landscaped, and since it was a beautiful warm evening, maybe we should go for a walk. So I suggested to him just that.

And he jumped at it.

I asked Frankenstein the bartender to get my bill, and when he presented it to me, Canada plunked down a hundred dollar bill and paid for it, leaving a $20 bill as a tip. As if Frankenstein was complicit in him leaving the bar with me. It all made me chuckle. The attention was really so fun. I found myself really liking it because the guys I see back home are just so fucking lazy!! And Rocker Boy has gone completely AWOL and I was just ripe for someone to pay attention to me and make me feel special and pretty you know??

Drinks in hand, we walked to the elevator, and when the doors shut, his gentlemanly side showed and he asked if he could kiss me. I said yes. He pressed his body up against mine and gave me a deep and affectionate kiss. He was delicious. I was tipsy by this point and the night felt perfectly romantic. The elevator ride wasn't long enough and suddenly the doors opened. We parted and got out, and I led him to the door to the rooftop pool. It was really a perfect night---close to 80 degrees and it was probably around 11 o'clock. The landscaping was so pretty; lights around the trees and plants curving around the fenced-in pool. I was hoping the hot tub was still open but it wasn't.

We stopped by some outdoor tables and he stopped with the charm and let his guard down. I really liked it. He started telling me about his divorce and how he's got full custody of his son and all.
He'd said that he was taking his son to Hollywood the next day, but would be staying one more night and then flying home. I said, "where's your phone?" He said, "Up in my room, my son has it." I said, "well, give me your number". He did, and I texted him so he'd have mine. I showed him my text and said, "there ya go. Tell you what. Play your cards right and maybe you'll have my room number tomorrow night." He said, "What do you mean?" I said, 'Text me and tell me how much you're thinking about me and can't wait to see me. Make me feel special." He said, "I can do that".

And suddenly we noticed that there was a couple in a window above us that was having sex! It appeared a woman was on her hands and knees giving some guy a blow job! We giggled and said, "that's hot!!"That's all he needed to get the courage to make a move on me and in seconds he was inches from me. He put his drink down on a nearby glass-top table. took mine from my hand, and started kissing me.  I let him. I felt that electrical surge course all through my body, and yes, my lady-parts, and I felt myself changing my mind about fucking him. I could feel his hard dick as he kissed me, deep and passionately, and I was super turned on. His kisses went from my mouth to my neck, to my cleavage, to my nipples as he used one hand to gently move the spaghetti strap aside. I felt my body melting into his and for a few seconds there, I just wanted to rip his clothes off. Unbeknownst to him, my room was right around the corner. Same floor.

We broke apart and he ruined the moment by putting his hand on his zipper. No way. I was done. I wasn't going to have outdoor sex with 300 rooms with windows all facing us. I moved it and said, "I'm walking you to the elevator." I started to walk towards the gate and he followed. He said, "So you're really not going to invite me to your room?" and I said, "Nope! That would ruin it." He looked like I'd taken his Halloween candy and pouted. I left him at the elevator with a short kiss, turned and walked away. I was worried he'd try to follow but he didn't.

Then next day, I didn't hear from him until 10:35 pm. He didn't know it but he'd blown it. I didn't meet up with him. I was disappointed to be honest. I was turned on all day thinking about fucking him but he couldn't even text once??? I finally wrote him back around midnight and just said sorry I'm out.

The next day I texted him, and we've been texting back and forth. He admitted he didn't think he'd hear from me again and I quote, "I'm in. I'm so turned on just talking to you." So this is fun. Who knows? Maybe our paths will cross again sometime in the future, or maybe we will MAKE them cross.

And THEN the sex will be amazing.

Rocker Boy rocks my world

Well, well, well my dear sexy readers, HAVE I GOT A STORY TO TELL YOU!!!!!!!

I just re-read my last post "Rocker Boy's Surprise Return" and just had to snicker because when I think of him now I think about the hot naked guy in my bed who I made cum three times.

Heh heh heh heh yeah!!!! RIGHT????!!! WHOA ANNA WHAT THE FUCK??!!!!

So in between that last blog post and last week, Rocker Boy one night had called me SEVEN TIMES between 3:30 am-5am. I never picked up. In the morning I texted him that I turn my phone off at night (which I do). I can't be his rescuer, I can't be the one to talk him off the ledge, and I needed to set a boundary with him. I decided he was probably gay anyways and so took my expectations about him down to the friend zone. If he really did like me he's the slowest ever to act on it so what the fuck. We'd been texting back and forth here and there mostly just to try to agree to meet up for coffee and nothing more. Except for saying that one time that "if something more happened that would be okay too" he's never flirted, never gave me any sign he was interested in anything more than friendship, especially after flaking out about meeting me on my way home from the airport.

So last week my hubby was out of town for work, and I had a whole week ahead of me with nothing more than just tennis and errands to look forward to. I should say that New Guy is completely out of the picture. Boring--no story to tell I'm just fed up and bored with him.  I had been texting Asian Stripper Boy a lot--he was SO attentive. Texting and Snapchatting me 24/7, saying the most sensual things to me, like "I love making you happy" and "OMG baby I just want to make you happy" and it goes on and on and on. So of course I had him in mind to fuck since he was so attentive and I've had fun with him before, it has just been over a year tho. So I decided I wanted to meet him for a drink first, not just have him show up, because what if I'm not attracted to him anymore? He's super flaky and even tho he's super hot, he seems to live a very fast lifestyle and I don't want to catch anything from him, so I thought I'd slow him down and meet up with him first.

We had plans Tuesday night to meet at this cute new bar that just went up and he wrote and cancelled. Said "family emergency" which I knew was a lie. He begged for me to try for the next night instead. I said "sure". I mean I had no other plans so why not. I didn't care really either way.

So Wednesday night I had a girl's dinner first, and I got a text from him mid-dinner, "I'm so sorry can we rain check i know I'm the worst rn". I didn't respond. Sooooo done.

Instead I wrote Rocker Boy, "What are u doing tonight? I had a date. He flaked on me" with a laughing till you're crying emoji. It'was 7:30-ish. He wrote right back he was at band practice til 8. I said, "awesome I'm at dinner. Let's get a drink somewhere". He didn't respond til 9:05, and at this point I was home and already tipsy from three glasses of wine and no dinner (what is it with chicks? Appetizers? We shared three bruschettas for 9 people. No one ordered dinner. I should have).

So I just said, "Home! You should come over. Empty house!" He asked for my address. He said, "you live in my hometown!" and he knew exactly where I lived just by the address. I raced around the house lighting candles. I didn't need to pick up thankfully bc my house was spotless.

He got here around 10:30pm. I wish I hadn't been so drunky but in a way it was good bc I was nervous. I had no idea what to expect. Why was he here??? I really didn't know what to expect.

I was so excited to see him though. He's so cute. Like Jordan, he's just my type--skinny rocker boy, lots of hair, looks sexy in skinny jeans and a band T-shirt. He's got the prettiest blue eyes too, shoulder-length black hair, messy and sexy. And great teeth and smile. I mean I'd had a crush on him for a year! It was just never reciprocated.

He came in and we went into the kitchen. He was very complimentary about the house. He was chatty, it was really a relief. Telling me about how he grew up near here, told me about his mom who has 4 cats (my dog and cat came up to greet him).

He sat down at the kitchen island and I asked him if he wanted a drink. I have quite a cabinet of alcohol with just about anything anybody could want LOL and sure enough I had what he wanted, rum and coke. First tho we did a shot of Fireball (my favorite). While he sipped his drink we chatted, I honestly don't remember about what though, and I don't remember how he got into my bed but next thing I knew we were naked and fucking! It was awesome! I had put on some EDM and with the candles everything looked so inviting. I love fucking and fucking like this when everything is quiet perfect. And probably I was a little too drunkie but I love that out-of-body feeling when you just merge with that other person, ya know? I used to feel that sober with Blondie. And of course I always feel that with my hubby but it's rare I ever feel that with someone else, so this was just what I had been wanting. I missed that feeling since Blondie ended things with me and this was the first time in almost 2 years I'd felt it with someone. Rocker Boy's small body and mine just fit so well together. I rode him like a wild cowgirl and when he went down on me, I grabbed that messy hair of his and shoved his face in my pussy and let him know how much I loved it.

We fell asleep wrapped up together like the cover of an erotic novel, our arms and legs and bodies entangled together. The cat jumping on the bed at dawn awoke us both, and as I opened my eyes I saw our bodies were still touching. We were 'spooning", his back was to me but my body was pressed up against his. Next thing I knew, he reached for me without turning around, caressing my hips, he then found my hand and squeezed it. Right then he flipped over and faced me and greeted me with a nice big hard dick. He started kissing me and I thought "omg morning breath" and oddly enough I was too dreamy and sleepy for it to really register and just kissed him back! And you know what all that kissing leads to hehehehe and "spooning leads to forking" and sure enough we were fucking again.

We fell back asleep again afterwards, cuddled up with one another again. It was so intimate and felt amazing and loving.

I woke up around 8:30, which for a weekday was really late. He was sound asleep, and I was restless, so I got up and made a pot of coffee, brushed my teeth, went to the bathroom and I won't apologize for this but put on a little make-up so I wouldn't look so horrifying when he woke up! I went back to bed and distracted myself with Facebook, my words with friends games, and various other time-wasters.I texted my hubby and we chatted for awhile--I wanted to make sure he knew what I was up to and make sure he was still ok with it all. He def was thankfully.

I was getting annoyed Rocker Boy was still asleep. I really didn't have anything going on ironically; my tennis match, I had NO appointments to go to, so I didn't have anything better to do than be with this hot man. I began texting my BFF. I told her, "there's a man in my bed and he ain't my husband!" She had been dying to hear from me since the night before when I wrote her that Asian Stripper Boy flaked on me and that Rocker Boy was coming over.

I think it got to be around 10:00 or so, and I was really bored and didn't know what to do. I didn't want him to leave, but I was bored watching him sleep. I never even got up to have a cup of the coffee I'd made. I don't know why! I guess I just forgot about it. I hadn't had any guy sleep over since Jordan did three years ago! I was baffled what to do. What was the etiquette???!!

My hubby said, "wake him with a BJ". I said, "really?? Won't he be annoyed I woke him?" He said, "Trust me. If he's annoyed you woke him with his dick in your mouth than kick him out!!!" I said, "okey doke!" So that's what I did. He was laying on his side with his back to me, and I just gently moved my body so it was touching his, and he stirred. I let my hand lightly touch him--his back, his cute butt, his thighs, and he stirred more and as he was turning over to face me I just took that hardening cock in my mouth and began sucking him. He moaned and squirmed in ecstasy. I was happy my hubby was right! He wasn't annoyed at all! He loved it! As I sucked and licked him I'd glance up at his face and he was staring right at me. It was so fun. He stroked my hair affectionately and watched me please him.

Then he put his hands on my face and gently took my mouth off of him. He put his hands on my waist and hips and pulled me on top of him. I fucked that boy hard while he sucked my nipples and he came so fast. Afterwards we laid there in each other's arms again and we both fell asleep. I felt so happy and loved and safe and it was really awesome.

Soon tho we both awoke again, and I asked him if he was hungry. He said, "YES!!" I said "me too! How about some scrambled eggs and toast?" He said "sounds awesome!" So I put on a sexy bralette and lingerie shorts and went downstairs and made us some food. He came down and looked so sexy, his hair all tousled. He was happy and we both sat down on the tall chairs on the kitchen island. It was awkward though--I found myself stammering and finally turned on the TV news for some sound. He wasn't chatty at all like he'd been the night before, and I found myself not knowing what to say or do. So when that happens I get MORE chatty and don't even realize I'm doing it, but he seemed to like hearing me talk LOL I showed him pics of our trip to Burning Man and he seemed interested.

I felt like I was ready for him to go then. He said he had to work at 1:30, and it was like noonish. I told him he could shower if he wanted to, and he said that sounded awesome. We went upstairs and I got him a big fluffy towel, told him to use whatever was in there and enjoy! I closed the door to give him privacy and just left him alone. I made the bed and then just sat and played with my phone while I waited for him. I pondered, "should I go shower with him? " Again, "whats the etiquette here??" I decided since he had to go to work that I'd leave him alone. He was probably in "work mode".

After he showered and dressed we went back upstairs and chatted for a bit about his job (he's a writer for a website) which is cool! And then it came time for him to leave. It still felt like there was so much awkwardness, and I'm pretty sure I hugged him and we kissed a perfunctory kiss at the door. Not very romantic but he was so quiet it made it awkward for me. I wished he'd just grabbed me and kissed me hard but he didn't so I was busy being self-conscious.

He left happily I thought, on a good note I hoped, and well, he did text me later that day but I haven't heard much from him since.

There's a major snag I'll tell you about next time. I did something I guess I shouldn't have done.