If you are one of my Twitter followers, you saw some tweets today that probably left you feeling like, "Poor Anna". Hopefully it did! But last night was fun so I'll tell you about that first. The "Poor Anna" situation that happened today was by the same guy I had fun with last night. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
I met this guy on Tinder, I'll call him Brian (NOT his real name), he's a 20-year old college boy, and he has seemed quite enamored of me. He has tried to see me a few times, but it's always "right now" and sorry I do have a life, a very busy one, and need a little more planning usually. I have a child too, I can't just gussy up at 10 o'clock at night and leave for hours--without any planning. So...he really started texting me a lot, then it went to Snapchatting and he just couldn't get enough of me. He begged me to come see him. He is SUPER cute, just my type, light brown hair, blue eyes, and in his pics he looks thin to average body, typical skinny constantly underfed college boy. I always creep on potential lovers to see if they know my own 20-year old son (LOL) and I saw from Brian's Facebook he had a very gorgeous girlfriend. I swear, she looks like a Victoria's Secret supermodel. Tall and thin, not a shred of fat on her, and always in sexy lingerie, posing just like a model, with a beautiful face and long, blonde hair below her breasts. I couldn't believe she wasn't enough for him???!!! SERIOUSLY???!! So, I was intrigued.
He wanted me to give him a BJ in his car. He wanted to meet in some park near his house, which is about 40 minutes from me. I told him, 'Uh, no, that's not going to happen." Who does he think I am, a two-bit hooker??? I was insulted. I just said, 'LOL I'm not 15 that's not my style." He said he lives with his parents (these seems to be an on-going theme here.....) so we couldn't go to his house. And of course my daughter's home so coming here was out of the question too. I told him I'd get a hotel room. He was a bit of an asshole in that he kept insisting I find something near HIM. I thought, "Fuck you! If I'm paying for a hotel room YOU can fucking drive to ME!!" Of course I didn't say that though.
I was having dinner/drinks with my hot mess BFF and she knew I was planning on meeting Brian. I told her, 'you teach people how to treat you. He said I am his first "MILF". I need to teach him that women our age don't give blowjobs in random parks at 10 o'clock at night!!!" LOL Well, maybe after we've been together a few times hehehehhe but not the very first time you meet him!!!!
So, I called around the nice hotels in the area, and they were all $169 a night. For one hour??? Fuck no. He was hot, but he wasn't THAT hot, and if it meant he had to wait for another time, so be it. I just got this over-riding feeling he had some jerk-ness to him. He was adamant that he got off work at 9, could meet me by 9:30, and that he was meeting some friend at the gym at 10:15. So I was losing interest quickly.
I thought too, if he's THAT good looking, and a bit of a self-centered jerk, he's used to girls falling all over him. Let him try a little fucking harder.
I texted him, "IDK babe hotels too expensive. At dinner with my friends right now." I was evasive and making him squirm. I loved it. And I was truly losing interest. He was too much work. I was doing everything and he was doing nothing.
So my friend and I were having a great time visiting and catching up, and he was persistent. Finally he said, "I'll drive there and you give me a BJ in the parking lot?" I was like, well, at least he's willing to drive 40 min each way. BUT I'm still not going to give him a BJ. What's in it for me?? What am I, 15 years old? Jesus Christ.
THEN I REMEMBERED THERE WAS A HOTEL RIGHT BEHIND THE RESTAURANT!! I asked the bartender if she knew what it was, and she said, "La Quinta"! I high-fived my BFF and called and sure enough, I got a reservation and it was only $82! I texted Brian and he was very excited. He said he'd meet me in the lobby at 9:30
Perfect!!!
He was running about 10 minutes behind, and my BFF and I paid for our dinner and I gulped down most of my third margarita. I drove over to the hotel (hehehe like 50 feet) and went in and paid for my room. Now, Anna has had sex in hotel rooms but I've never paid for one JUST FOR THE PURPOSE OF HAVING SEX. So this was naughty and fun. The slim, young attractive African-American front desk clerk was sweet as punch. I went up to the room to get situated, and within a few minutes, he texted he was "here." I went down the elevator (three floors) and there he was, sitting on one of the cheesy lime green brushed velvet chairs in the tiny lobby. Our eyes met and we both smiled, and he got up and walked over to me. We said our hellos and we walked together the few steps over to the elevator.
He asked what floor as I pushed the number 3 button. I was nervous but had almost 3 peach margaritas in me, which helped my nerves. He was cuter than his pics. Wearing baggy sweats with his high school emblem on it and a tight muscle T-shirt, I was like, "whoa, this guy's a fucking 10!!!" Waiting for the elevator, which turned out to be a very long minute, we nervously glanced at each other, and staring at me, he said, "wow, you're even prettier than your pics!" That made me smile so big!! I said 'Thank you!' and the door opened.
Once we got into the room, we were both awkward and didn't know how to get started. Clearly he was waiting for me to make the first move. I remembered something his Tinder profile said that I thought was very endearing, not at all "jerk-like", and that was, "7th best kisser in (my city)". He laid down on one of the queen beds and made himself comfortable, and he said, "Come here". I LOVE being told what to do and obeyed. I climbed on top of him and straddled him, and just kissed him. He has really full lips and he was a very good kisser! So in-between kisses, "Hmmm, I'd say you're at least 5th best kisser in (name of city)" He thought that was cute and giggled. He slid my panties off and commented that he loved my stillettos and that I hadn't taken them off.
He warned me he hadn't had sex in a long time (probably a few days hehehe) and was hoping he wouldn't come too quickly. I said that was fine, that I would take that as a compliment.He mentioned his girlfriend and said he'd broken up with her. We also had been talking about meeting today after his class at the junior college that's happily only a mile and a half away from me!! So that was the agreement; if he came too quickly, he'd make it up to me tomorrow (today).
He took off his T-shirt, and I gasped. I literally gasped. He looked just like an Abercrombie model. Not a shred of fat on him anywhere. He had the "V" abs. Molded biceps and hairless chest. He was PERFECT. I loved his big, strong arms, and I loved the way he couldn't take his eyes off me. I've fucked a lot of guys who close their eyes and he wasn't one of them. It was really neat. I really liked it.
Then I asked him to take off his sweat pants. OMG he had on those tight boxers I love and had a huge hard-on. I admired his beautiful body, and touched his legs and abs, and told him how beautiful i thought he was. He returned the compliment. I took off my dress over my head and tossed it aside and he undid my bra in the back and took it off. He cupped my breasts in his hands, and shoved them in his face and gave my nipples some hard sucking. I wanted to taste him, all over.
I started with kissing him, then nibbled his neck (I whispered I wouldn't leave marks), and licked and kissed his chest and continued down his torso, to his throbbing hard cock. His hands just glided gently over me and I went down on him. He WAS delicious. He interrupted my sucking and said, "I'm sorry for not shaving down there." I said, 'It's fine, I didn't even notice". And I hadn't. There wasn't much hair. I was too busy being turned on and having a great time. Then he told me what he wanted, and that was to flip around and sit on his face while I sucked his cock.
WOW I had never done that with anyone but my hubby! And I can't remember the last time we did that! Brian put his fingers in me and fucked me with them, and alternatively, licked my clit. He was very pleasantly surprised and said, "WOW! YOU'RE PIERCED THERE?" I said, 'yep!" He dug his tongue in deeper.
Then he was ready to fuck me.
I had brought 2 condoms with me, and had them on the bed with us. I opened one of them, and felt his eyes on me as if I were a one-way mirror and I didn't realize I was being watched. It was really amazing. I felt like he really, really was into me.
I put the condom on him, and helped, and I said how I thought that was a turn-on, putting a condom on. He agreed.
He wanted me on top, and I fucked him for a bit and it felt great. Then he wanted to be on top, and he grabbed his balls and said, "I read somewhere that this stops me from cumming too soon." I said, 'Awesome!! That's hot!!" So he sat there on his knees, holding his balls, this muscled, 20 year old fucking hottie, and I was on my back, legs splayed out watching him. After about 30 seconds or so, he grabbed my legs and spread them wider and put his juicy big cock in me and fucked me hard. It didn't last long, I was just getting into it when he said, "Want me to pull off the condom and cum on you?" I said,'oh yeah that would be hot!" and he pulled out and tried to yank off the condom but it got stuck on the tip. I helped pull it off and cum sprayed all over my stomach. It was awesome.
It was maybe 15-20 minutes from start to finish. He was delicious and fun, but I was clearly unsatiated and couldn't wait for this morning when he was going to come back. Then he started taking pictures of me. He asked me to stay on my back and he spread my legs and took a pic. I made sure my head was turned with my hair covering my face. He showed it to me afterwards and said how hot it was. I started to get dressed; I put my bra and panties on and he asked for a pic from behind. I posed for him, again, shielding my face. He took a few more pics when I wasn't posing, as if I was a celebrity he bumped into on the street. He showed them all to me, and they were all flattering, and my face couldn't be seen in any of them. He said,'I want to show my friend back home." Why wouldn't I think it was flattering?
We got dressed and he asked where the condom was LOL I found it on the bed and tossed it in the toilet. He got his keys and we looked at each other, and he said, 'Much better than a BJ in the park" and laughed and I said, 'Definitely!!!" I grabbed my purse and phone, and we walked out the hotel room door.
When we got outside the hotel, again he mentioned his class was from 7:30-9:20 and he would come over after. I said I couldn't wait!! He started to walk off and I said, 'Hey! Say goodbye!" with a playful laugh and he came back and we hugged awkwardly and kissed. It was more of a peck. Not what I was hoping for but oh well. I walked one way to my car and he walked the opposite.
Soooooooo.......I was signed up for a 9 am exercise class but I chose to miss it to fuck Brian again. After I got home from taking my daughter to school, I started to get ready. It was exactly 7:30. I hadn't heard from him but didn't really think much of it, I assumed since the class was so early, he would be tired and racing to make it to class on time. I showered and got ready, lit candles and had a couple pieces of toast since I was so hungry. I realized I didn't need any alcohol this time, I felt dreamy from it being so early and having had fun with him last night.
So I simply texted him, "Good morning", and then gave my address and directions to my house. I sent a naked snapchat to excite him.
Nine-twenty came and went, and so did 9:30 when I wrote, "are you coming?" At 10:35 when he still hadn't responded, I sent a final text, "WTF". He had opened the snapchat pic of me at 10:21 and didn't respond.
It is now nearly 8 pm and not a peep.
WHATEVER.
I'm really getting tired of this shit.
I guess I was intuitive about his "jerk-ness".
What about all the pics he took??? Am I just some joke to his friends? Or was he bragging?
Readers? Help me here?
Tell me what you think.
Thursday, September 17, 2015
Friday, September 4, 2015
My night of rejections
The evening started out fun since I was meeting a group of my girlfriends for happy hour. The usually fun bar was filled with aging, white middle-aged business men and blue-collar women who actually go out to a trendy bar dressed as if it's a trip to the grocery store. I felt over-dressed and everyone stared when I walked to the restroom, which was nice hehehe I will admit I'd rather be over-dressed than under-dressed.....anyways, no cute guys is my point. BORING. One of the fun things about happy hour and sitting at the bar is flirting. One of my BFF's likes old bald guys (yay for them! Cuz she's HOT!!) was flirting but I was just getting drunk and bored.
So I drunk texted F a sexy pic of me. Still hasn't responded, but it says "delivered", so I know he got it. It was a selfie, nothing skanky. Just my face. Oh, and my cleavage. Heheheh.
It was just a night of rejections. One by one, I sent sexy selfies to a couple guys and they didn't even respond. How annoying! Even my girlfriends told me, "Girl, you are looking HOT!! You should have some fun tonight!!!" My hubby was out of town too on business, so yeah, I didn't need to be anywhere. My daughter was out with her BF so I had a little time for some naughty fun.
I finally decided to just be a good girl and go home after I half-drank my third peach margarita. My one friend had a date and the other two had work in the morning (I don't!!) so yeah, I decided to just go home.
I was texting my hubby and lamenting to him my rotten luck at getting a guy to follow through. I'm so sick of texting and Snapchats and nothing every coming from it. He said, "Why don't you write Allen?" I said, 'hmmm I actually was thinking of him!" But I thought of someone I liked better.
Jordan.
And he responded immediately!!!
We went back and forth for over an hour, stepping up the sexting with every text. He was begging for pics and for me to tell him what I was going to do to him. He begged for video of me with my vibrator. I complied. It was so much fun.
He said he was coming over!!!
I let my husband know and he was so excited for me! My daughter was sound asleep by this point, it was almost midnight, and I ran around the house picking up and lighting candles.
And then he said his car wouldn't start.
I'm not naive. I knew it was a lie, but I didn't want to be a bitch so I played along. He didn't even apologize, which made me feel like maybe he was telling the truth?? Either way I was fine. I was happy just having that sexy connection with him again. He did ask when my hubby would be out of town again and I said I didn't know but that I would give him a couple days' heads up next time so we can get together. He said, "Okay darling, goodnight" and that was that.
I DO have a date today. At noon. I met him on Craig's list ironically and I did go to meet him at his work last week. I'm not super attracted; the pic he sent he looked so much like F and I was like OMG I have to fuck this guy. In person, not so much at all. In fact, he looks more like Freddie Mercury. I think I'll call him Freddie hahaha because I will be writing about what happens today.
He's 25 and actually lives a mile away! AND he has his OWN apartment!! That's rare these days. Most of these young guys either have several roommates or live with their parents, so that's a plus in his corner. Also, he is really really really into me, he told me yesterday that I'm all he thinks about. AWWWWWW that's all I really want is for someone to feel that way about me!!!
So, I promised my hubby I'd give him a chance. Today is that chance.
I'll let you know how it turns out!
Have a great weekend my sexy readers!!!
Love,
Anna XO
So I drunk texted F a sexy pic of me. Still hasn't responded, but it says "delivered", so I know he got it. It was a selfie, nothing skanky. Just my face. Oh, and my cleavage. Heheheh.
It was just a night of rejections. One by one, I sent sexy selfies to a couple guys and they didn't even respond. How annoying! Even my girlfriends told me, "Girl, you are looking HOT!! You should have some fun tonight!!!" My hubby was out of town too on business, so yeah, I didn't need to be anywhere. My daughter was out with her BF so I had a little time for some naughty fun.
I finally decided to just be a good girl and go home after I half-drank my third peach margarita. My one friend had a date and the other two had work in the morning (I don't!!) so yeah, I decided to just go home.
I was texting my hubby and lamenting to him my rotten luck at getting a guy to follow through. I'm so sick of texting and Snapchats and nothing every coming from it. He said, "Why don't you write Allen?" I said, 'hmmm I actually was thinking of him!" But I thought of someone I liked better.
Jordan.
And he responded immediately!!!
We went back and forth for over an hour, stepping up the sexting with every text. He was begging for pics and for me to tell him what I was going to do to him. He begged for video of me with my vibrator. I complied. It was so much fun.
He said he was coming over!!!
I let my husband know and he was so excited for me! My daughter was sound asleep by this point, it was almost midnight, and I ran around the house picking up and lighting candles.
And then he said his car wouldn't start.
I'm not naive. I knew it was a lie, but I didn't want to be a bitch so I played along. He didn't even apologize, which made me feel like maybe he was telling the truth?? Either way I was fine. I was happy just having that sexy connection with him again. He did ask when my hubby would be out of town again and I said I didn't know but that I would give him a couple days' heads up next time so we can get together. He said, "Okay darling, goodnight" and that was that.
I DO have a date today. At noon. I met him on Craig's list ironically and I did go to meet him at his work last week. I'm not super attracted; the pic he sent he looked so much like F and I was like OMG I have to fuck this guy. In person, not so much at all. In fact, he looks more like Freddie Mercury. I think I'll call him Freddie hahaha because I will be writing about what happens today.
He's 25 and actually lives a mile away! AND he has his OWN apartment!! That's rare these days. Most of these young guys either have several roommates or live with their parents, so that's a plus in his corner. Also, he is really really really into me, he told me yesterday that I'm all he thinks about. AWWWWWW that's all I really want is for someone to feel that way about me!!!
So, I promised my hubby I'd give him a chance. Today is that chance.
I'll let you know how it turns out!
Have a great weekend my sexy readers!!!
Love,
Anna XO
Monday, August 31, 2015
My weirdest date ever
I had the strangest experience the other night, and would very much like you sexy readers to tell me what you think of it. It was so bizarre.
Tinder has been a steady provider of hot guys for me, and one in particular I will call Tyler (NOT his real name). We started chatting in June, but it never led anywhere. He would pop in and out saying startling things like, "Can I come over right now? I want to fuck you so bad." No chit-chat like, "How's your day been?" like most guys write. And so there was never any planning, so it was always, "sorry babe, no, I can't see you right now", cuz I'm a mom and have a job so his timing always was off.
We started up again a few days ago with Snapchatting. He was on his way to a wedding he was going to be in, and had on a tuxedo. He looked AMAZING. VERY VERY handsome. Blonde hair slicked back, big blue eyes, dimples in his smile, and a mischievous grin. Pics taken from inside a limo. He'd been writing me all day begging me to come see him later on in the evening, and I said I would.
He wanted me badly, he said. Would I pick him up from the bar he was at? He said the limo had dropped him off. I figured he was ditching the wedding party to be with me. I said sure. Finally our timing was perfect.
My hubby and I had been having a wonderful date! We had dinner from the 26th floor restaurant at our favorite place, and we were getting tipsy. We bar hopped and between a couple of Cosmos and a bottle of wine, we were flirty and horny, and the night was still young. He loved that I was going to get fucked by my stud. We drove to Tyler's hotel and I dropped my hubby off, and then I drove to go get Tyler. What luck the hotel was only a half mile away from the bar he was at!!! I texted him I was almost there, and drove up outside it. He came out, and I was already creaming my panties. What a fucking gorgeous 24 year old. Still dressed in his tux, looking very dapper, he got in my car. We said breathy "Hi"'s like we'd known each other forever. We started kissing furiously. We wanted each other so badly. The chemistry was insane. I haven't felt that way with anyone except Jordan and F. It's what I've been searching for.
We were so hungry for one another. We were practically dry humping each other in the front seat of my car. Someone honked and that startled us and we broke our hold on each other and giggled. I don't remember much we said except I told him how gorgeous he looked and he said the same to me, and groped my breasts and kissed my neck while I was (a little drunkenly) trying to drive. It was so fun! I only had to go a half-mile.
My hubby's plan was to keep an eye on me and make sure I was okay. I was to leave the car running outside the hotel, and walk in. He would let me walk past him then go out and park the car, so that's what we did. I know Tyler didn't see my hubby there in the lobby, but as he and I were walking with linked arms together, I winked at my husband and he grinned at me, got up and went out to the car. Tyler was a little drunk himself, and he couldn't find his hotel room key. Finally he did and like little kids about to go to Disneyland, and we skipped to the elevator! He was confused and didn't know what floor it was, but told me it was room 713, so I said, "7th floor babe!" and pushed the right button.
We got into his room and as I expected it, there were two full beds unkempt with various men's clothes and shoes scattered. I knew he was part of a wedding party and probably there were more than one groomsman had changed clothes in the room. It wasn't gross or dirty just scattered men's clothes. Very sexy.
Now keep in mind we were both very tipsy and very horny. We walked over to one of the beds and it was like we didn't need to talk. We both knew what we wanted. I sat down on the edge of the bed and he put my stilleto-shoed legs up and slid my panties off and went down on me. Straightaway!! And my loyal readers know how badly I have been trying to find a guy that will do that like F did!!! I was falling in love.
After a few minutes, he pulled himself up and directed me, "Get on your knees." It was hot and I did as I was told. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his dick which was already hard. I started to suck him and lick him when I heard someone knocking on the inside door that conjoins his room with the one next to it.
I got up and he tucked his cock back in and zipped up his pants and went to talk to whomever it was. I couldn't understand anything they were saying. I just wanted him to fucking go away!
Suddenly this guy was in our room! He looked like Tommy Lee Jones and seemed angry. I was standing by the sink, and next thing I know, he tosses my panties onto the counter by me. I was like, "What the fuck???" Everything seemed hazy.
Then the front door opened, and a white-haired, good looking older man that reminded me of Roger Sterling from "Mad Men" walked in. He was wearing a tux too, a different color, lavender maybe? And I was like WTF is going on???!! And I couldn't hear what they were saying. I forgot to mention, I've had a bad ear infection for a week, and even though I've been on antibiotics, I'm almost completely deaf, so besides being tipsy unless they were talking loudly I wasn't going to be able to now what they were saying. Tyler wasn't looking at me, he was looking at the ground and all of a sudden, he was packing up all his things! His clothes, his shoes, the dry-cleaning bag that had held his tux in. He was awkwardly holding all of it and they ushered us out the door! We were standing in the hallway, Tyler looking away and the two men looking at me like I was a cheap hooker. The Roger Sterling guy said to me something about being the father of the bride and something about "ex-something" and nodded towards Tyler, but I don't know what he said. He said, "Young lady, I assume you have transportation home?" I said, "Of course, my car is here." And then it hit me------all I could think of was, OH MY GOD TYLER IS THE FUCKING GROOM!!!!!
That is the ONLY thing that would make sense. Suddenly angry instead of embarrassed, I said to Tyler in front of the other two men angrily, "Are you single Tyler?" He answered quietly, "yes". I said, "Are you hurting anyone by being with me here right now?" and he said, "No". I said loudly and angrily to all three men, ' THEN WHAT THE FUCK?????????!!!" and I turned and started to walk away.
I had no idea what happened.
I got in the elevator and texted my husband. He said he would be pulling up in front of the hotel in a second. Tyler and "Roger", the father of the bride must've gotten into the elevator next to me at the same fucking time cuz as I got out, so did they! They walked right past me and didn't look at me or say anything. It was so fucking weird. Tyler was still awkwardly holding all his belongings. It was raining, and a black van pulls up and "Roger" opens the door and Tyler gets in. My hubby's car pulled up right at that moment and I got in.
My husband confided that he was just outside the hotel room when he saw 'Roger" walk up and knock. He wanted to make sure I was okay, and was too wondering, "what the fuck???" He couldn't hear what was being said either.
Furious, I texted Tyler, "WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?? YOU OWE ME AN EXPLANATION. ARE YOU THE FUCKING GROOM????" He answered, but not right away, "hahah no I'm not the groom." Like it was funny???!!
It's now Monday morning, and I STILL haven't gotten an explanation. I creeped on his FB and there's nothing new, BUT I found out it was his cousin that got married. Her FB pic shows her and her groom and it's not Tyler, thank God. So he was telling the truth, he wasn't the groom. So.....WTF happened?? Why was I being ushered out like I was 15 and got caught by my boyfriends' parents, and why did they kick HIM out of his room??
He wrote me yesterday, "Are you free?" I wanted to say, "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??" but I said, "Maybe later tonight".
Haven't heard back.
Readers?
Tinder has been a steady provider of hot guys for me, and one in particular I will call Tyler (NOT his real name). We started chatting in June, but it never led anywhere. He would pop in and out saying startling things like, "Can I come over right now? I want to fuck you so bad." No chit-chat like, "How's your day been?" like most guys write. And so there was never any planning, so it was always, "sorry babe, no, I can't see you right now", cuz I'm a mom and have a job so his timing always was off.
We started up again a few days ago with Snapchatting. He was on his way to a wedding he was going to be in, and had on a tuxedo. He looked AMAZING. VERY VERY handsome. Blonde hair slicked back, big blue eyes, dimples in his smile, and a mischievous grin. Pics taken from inside a limo. He'd been writing me all day begging me to come see him later on in the evening, and I said I would.
He wanted me badly, he said. Would I pick him up from the bar he was at? He said the limo had dropped him off. I figured he was ditching the wedding party to be with me. I said sure. Finally our timing was perfect.
My hubby and I had been having a wonderful date! We had dinner from the 26th floor restaurant at our favorite place, and we were getting tipsy. We bar hopped and between a couple of Cosmos and a bottle of wine, we were flirty and horny, and the night was still young. He loved that I was going to get fucked by my stud. We drove to Tyler's hotel and I dropped my hubby off, and then I drove to go get Tyler. What luck the hotel was only a half mile away from the bar he was at!!! I texted him I was almost there, and drove up outside it. He came out, and I was already creaming my panties. What a fucking gorgeous 24 year old. Still dressed in his tux, looking very dapper, he got in my car. We said breathy "Hi"'s like we'd known each other forever. We started kissing furiously. We wanted each other so badly. The chemistry was insane. I haven't felt that way with anyone except Jordan and F. It's what I've been searching for.
We were so hungry for one another. We were practically dry humping each other in the front seat of my car. Someone honked and that startled us and we broke our hold on each other and giggled. I don't remember much we said except I told him how gorgeous he looked and he said the same to me, and groped my breasts and kissed my neck while I was (a little drunkenly) trying to drive. It was so fun! I only had to go a half-mile.
My hubby's plan was to keep an eye on me and make sure I was okay. I was to leave the car running outside the hotel, and walk in. He would let me walk past him then go out and park the car, so that's what we did. I know Tyler didn't see my hubby there in the lobby, but as he and I were walking with linked arms together, I winked at my husband and he grinned at me, got up and went out to the car. Tyler was a little drunk himself, and he couldn't find his hotel room key. Finally he did and like little kids about to go to Disneyland, and we skipped to the elevator! He was confused and didn't know what floor it was, but told me it was room 713, so I said, "7th floor babe!" and pushed the right button.
We got into his room and as I expected it, there were two full beds unkempt with various men's clothes and shoes scattered. I knew he was part of a wedding party and probably there were more than one groomsman had changed clothes in the room. It wasn't gross or dirty just scattered men's clothes. Very sexy.
Now keep in mind we were both very tipsy and very horny. We walked over to one of the beds and it was like we didn't need to talk. We both knew what we wanted. I sat down on the edge of the bed and he put my stilleto-shoed legs up and slid my panties off and went down on me. Straightaway!! And my loyal readers know how badly I have been trying to find a guy that will do that like F did!!! I was falling in love.
After a few minutes, he pulled himself up and directed me, "Get on your knees." It was hot and I did as I was told. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his dick which was already hard. I started to suck him and lick him when I heard someone knocking on the inside door that conjoins his room with the one next to it.
I got up and he tucked his cock back in and zipped up his pants and went to talk to whomever it was. I couldn't understand anything they were saying. I just wanted him to fucking go away!
Suddenly this guy was in our room! He looked like Tommy Lee Jones and seemed angry. I was standing by the sink, and next thing I know, he tosses my panties onto the counter by me. I was like, "What the fuck???" Everything seemed hazy.
Then the front door opened, and a white-haired, good looking older man that reminded me of Roger Sterling from "Mad Men" walked in. He was wearing a tux too, a different color, lavender maybe? And I was like WTF is going on???!! And I couldn't hear what they were saying. I forgot to mention, I've had a bad ear infection for a week, and even though I've been on antibiotics, I'm almost completely deaf, so besides being tipsy unless they were talking loudly I wasn't going to be able to now what they were saying. Tyler wasn't looking at me, he was looking at the ground and all of a sudden, he was packing up all his things! His clothes, his shoes, the dry-cleaning bag that had held his tux in. He was awkwardly holding all of it and they ushered us out the door! We were standing in the hallway, Tyler looking away and the two men looking at me like I was a cheap hooker. The Roger Sterling guy said to me something about being the father of the bride and something about "ex-something" and nodded towards Tyler, but I don't know what he said. He said, "Young lady, I assume you have transportation home?" I said, "Of course, my car is here." And then it hit me------all I could think of was, OH MY GOD TYLER IS THE FUCKING GROOM!!!!!
That is the ONLY thing that would make sense. Suddenly angry instead of embarrassed, I said to Tyler in front of the other two men angrily, "Are you single Tyler?" He answered quietly, "yes". I said, "Are you hurting anyone by being with me here right now?" and he said, "No". I said loudly and angrily to all three men, ' THEN WHAT THE FUCK?????????!!!" and I turned and started to walk away.
I had no idea what happened.
I got in the elevator and texted my husband. He said he would be pulling up in front of the hotel in a second. Tyler and "Roger", the father of the bride must've gotten into the elevator next to me at the same fucking time cuz as I got out, so did they! They walked right past me and didn't look at me or say anything. It was so fucking weird. Tyler was still awkwardly holding all his belongings. It was raining, and a black van pulls up and "Roger" opens the door and Tyler gets in. My hubby's car pulled up right at that moment and I got in.
My husband confided that he was just outside the hotel room when he saw 'Roger" walk up and knock. He wanted to make sure I was okay, and was too wondering, "what the fuck???" He couldn't hear what was being said either.
Furious, I texted Tyler, "WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?? YOU OWE ME AN EXPLANATION. ARE YOU THE FUCKING GROOM????" He answered, but not right away, "hahah no I'm not the groom." Like it was funny???!!
It's now Monday morning, and I STILL haven't gotten an explanation. I creeped on his FB and there's nothing new, BUT I found out it was his cousin that got married. Her FB pic shows her and her groom and it's not Tyler, thank God. So he was telling the truth, he wasn't the groom. So.....WTF happened?? Why was I being ushered out like I was 15 and got caught by my boyfriends' parents, and why did they kick HIM out of his room??
He wrote me yesterday, "Are you free?" I wanted to say, "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??" but I said, "Maybe later tonight".
Haven't heard back.
Readers?
Saturday, August 22, 2015
My first "facial"
Hello my lovelies! I'm sorry I haven't had much to write about lately, but I DID have some fun a couple weeks back and I haven't had time to write about it until now.
I "met" a super cute 19 yr old guy on Tinder who reminded me so much of F it's uncanny.A thick, gorgeous crop of wavy brown hair, brown eyes, and a similar body to F. Same age too (hehehe). He was texting me hard and heavy and within a few days, he was driving up to my house.
I was going to be his first MILF! And he was very nervous, and asked me to only give him a BJ. I said that would be fun. No problem. I always let the guy steer the boat. He looked so much like F I couldn't believe it! He was short and dressed almost exactly like him (those khaki cargo shorts...mmmm) and a white t-shirt. He had these really cute freckles across his nose and under his eyes, he was just absolutely adorable. He made me feel at ease, that and the shot of vodka I did when I saw him drive up!
For a guy that professed to be so nervous, I couldn't tell at all, because he seemed so comfortable around me. We just sat on the bed chatting; we are both runners and he was really interested in hearing about the 5K's and 10K's that I've done. He was a track star at his high school and still runs too.
He had told me he was on his way to a Brewer game with his group of friends, and had told them he had a doctor's appointment and made them wait for him so he could come see me! When we'd been texting, he said he only had an hour and would I be able to make him cum in that time? Well, NaughtyAnna chuckled to herself, "babe, we will have about 45 minutes or more left over" but I didn't tell him that. I said, "Yeah, we should be good" and when he got here, I set my phone alarm for 12:22 as he asked me to.
We spent most of the time talking!! Then he couldn't wait to get started and began to rip off his clothes. It was cute. I loved it. I had on a dress with a sexy bra and panty set on underneath and I had on a pair of flesh-colored stilettos. My hair and makeup looked good and I felt confident, and soon he wasn't wearing anything but a smile. Mmmmm. He was DELICIOUS. His body could've been F's. Rock hard abs, tiny waist, he had a small torso, just the way I like it.
I slipped my dress off over my head and tossed it to the ground, and he breathed, "oh my god" as it was coming off. I kept my stilettos on. He laid back on the bed like he owned it, ready for me to begin.
I couldn't believe this gorgeous man was laying naked in my bed. I couldn't believe this middle-aged me could get a guy like him. I saw his GF on his Facebook, and she looks like a Victoria's Secret model. Tall and lithe, blonde and not a scrap of fat on her body anywhere. What the hell was he doing with me??!! I stopped thinking and just let myself enjoy the moment.
I began with his neck, and would go back up to his full lips. I love kissing and he seemed startled by everything I did, but in a good way. Because he had no idea what I was going to do next, he seemed unsettled but then would relax as he realized he liked what I was doing! I was having a great time. This male buffet spread out on my bed was the most delicious thing I'd had before me since F. I never wanted the afternoon to end.
I just ate him up, and he squirmed and moaned. I took my time up and down his body, licking and sucking him. I'd go from his neck, and kiss and lick and take nibbles of his chest and tummy and then go around his cock, licking his thighs, and completely avoiding his throbbing cock. He had his hands on my head, his back arched in ecstasy, his eyes alternating between open, watching me with such desire, and closed with his head back, enjoying the sensations of being totally adored and admired by me.
I finally scooped up his manscaped balls in my mouth and he became more vocal. Clearly he had never had a BJ like mine. (hehehehe what can I say??? I'm good at it.) He could take it no more and started giving me verbal directions. It was so fucking hot.
"Get on your knees", he directed me as he slid down to the edge of the bed. I did as I was told. He grabbed his hard cock and slapped me in the face with it. It was so hot. I tried to grab it with my mouth and I finally got it and started sucking on it. I loved how he was holding it in my mouth, looking down at me so turned on. I knelt as I'd been told, and just licked and sucked his balls and cock, licking his thighs in anticipation. He moaned and held my head and stroked my hair lovingly, and I can still see the way he looked at me. It was soooooo yummy. HE was sooooo yummy. I didn't mind that he was getting all the pleasure because it gave me so much pleasure giving this gift of a blow job to him. I was as turned on as he was.
He continued to tell me what to do and I loved it. "Suck it! Suck it harder!" "That's it, lick it, take it all". He never was abusive in any way, just turned on and giving me directions. I loved it.
He was finally ready to cum, and I assumed he wanted me to swallow, but he had something else in mind.
"Can I cum on your face?" he asked me, holding his big, thick cock in his right hand.
"Yes", I purred. And he did. His back arched, my mouth on the tip and masturbating himself, he started to squirt all over my face. I licked what was on and around my mouth and drank up. He tasted delicious.
We were both smiling now, and I got up from my knees, walked a few shorts steps to the bathroom and grabbed us a towel. I wiped off my face, and gave it to him, and I told him that was the first time anyone's ever done that to me. He was incredulous! I said it was true! And it was!!! Not even my husband of 23 years. NO ONE has ever cum on my face before. I wasn't sure I would like it.
I DID. I LOVED IT.
And so did he.
We sat there together for a few minutes, and I knew he was probably now worried about the time, so I looked at my phone and we had 7 minutes to spare!! hehehe He giggled and began to get dressed. He saw my dress on the floor and handed it to me with a cute giggle.
He realized that he was ready for more. He wanted more than just oral sex, and said, "I want to fuck you so bad now. What are you doing tomorrow?" hehehe I said I was going out of town. He said, "NO! SERIOUSLY???? WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK???", exasperated at the thought of waiting. I said I'd let him know when I got back. He sighed, disappointed. I was happy inside, and was smiling.
The alarm finally went off, and we were both dressed at this point just chatting, I don't remember about what. He was so relaxed and seemed to feel so comfortable around me, it was really really nice. I thought, "I have replaced F", and thought, "Anna, you are falling for this one aren't you??"
We walked downstairs, and at the door to say our goodbyes when I leaned over to kiss him and he reached out to shake my hand!!! It was so awkward and hilarious, I was thinking, "I'm not a prostitute! WTF???" and meekly shook it back. I think I did kiss him anyways, and we said our goodbyes.
He's texted me a few times and sent a few snapchats but hasn't suggested getting together, but it's ok. I've got oh, five or six possible new guys I'm chatting with. Anna doesn't sit around and wait for any guy.
But I would definitely say "Freckles" has moved up the list and is my #2 choice right now.
F will always be #1.
I "met" a super cute 19 yr old guy on Tinder who reminded me so much of F it's uncanny.A thick, gorgeous crop of wavy brown hair, brown eyes, and a similar body to F. Same age too (hehehe). He was texting me hard and heavy and within a few days, he was driving up to my house.
I was going to be his first MILF! And he was very nervous, and asked me to only give him a BJ. I said that would be fun. No problem. I always let the guy steer the boat. He looked so much like F I couldn't believe it! He was short and dressed almost exactly like him (those khaki cargo shorts...mmmm) and a white t-shirt. He had these really cute freckles across his nose and under his eyes, he was just absolutely adorable. He made me feel at ease, that and the shot of vodka I did when I saw him drive up!
For a guy that professed to be so nervous, I couldn't tell at all, because he seemed so comfortable around me. We just sat on the bed chatting; we are both runners and he was really interested in hearing about the 5K's and 10K's that I've done. He was a track star at his high school and still runs too.
He had told me he was on his way to a Brewer game with his group of friends, and had told them he had a doctor's appointment and made them wait for him so he could come see me! When we'd been texting, he said he only had an hour and would I be able to make him cum in that time? Well, NaughtyAnna chuckled to herself, "babe, we will have about 45 minutes or more left over" but I didn't tell him that. I said, "Yeah, we should be good" and when he got here, I set my phone alarm for 12:22 as he asked me to.
We spent most of the time talking!! Then he couldn't wait to get started and began to rip off his clothes. It was cute. I loved it. I had on a dress with a sexy bra and panty set on underneath and I had on a pair of flesh-colored stilettos. My hair and makeup looked good and I felt confident, and soon he wasn't wearing anything but a smile. Mmmmm. He was DELICIOUS. His body could've been F's. Rock hard abs, tiny waist, he had a small torso, just the way I like it.
I slipped my dress off over my head and tossed it to the ground, and he breathed, "oh my god" as it was coming off. I kept my stilettos on. He laid back on the bed like he owned it, ready for me to begin.
I couldn't believe this gorgeous man was laying naked in my bed. I couldn't believe this middle-aged me could get a guy like him. I saw his GF on his Facebook, and she looks like a Victoria's Secret model. Tall and lithe, blonde and not a scrap of fat on her body anywhere. What the hell was he doing with me??!! I stopped thinking and just let myself enjoy the moment.
I began with his neck, and would go back up to his full lips. I love kissing and he seemed startled by everything I did, but in a good way. Because he had no idea what I was going to do next, he seemed unsettled but then would relax as he realized he liked what I was doing! I was having a great time. This male buffet spread out on my bed was the most delicious thing I'd had before me since F. I never wanted the afternoon to end.
I just ate him up, and he squirmed and moaned. I took my time up and down his body, licking and sucking him. I'd go from his neck, and kiss and lick and take nibbles of his chest and tummy and then go around his cock, licking his thighs, and completely avoiding his throbbing cock. He had his hands on my head, his back arched in ecstasy, his eyes alternating between open, watching me with such desire, and closed with his head back, enjoying the sensations of being totally adored and admired by me.
I finally scooped up his manscaped balls in my mouth and he became more vocal. Clearly he had never had a BJ like mine. (hehehehe what can I say??? I'm good at it.) He could take it no more and started giving me verbal directions. It was so fucking hot.
"Get on your knees", he directed me as he slid down to the edge of the bed. I did as I was told. He grabbed his hard cock and slapped me in the face with it. It was so hot. I tried to grab it with my mouth and I finally got it and started sucking on it. I loved how he was holding it in my mouth, looking down at me so turned on. I knelt as I'd been told, and just licked and sucked his balls and cock, licking his thighs in anticipation. He moaned and held my head and stroked my hair lovingly, and I can still see the way he looked at me. It was soooooo yummy. HE was sooooo yummy. I didn't mind that he was getting all the pleasure because it gave me so much pleasure giving this gift of a blow job to him. I was as turned on as he was.
He continued to tell me what to do and I loved it. "Suck it! Suck it harder!" "That's it, lick it, take it all". He never was abusive in any way, just turned on and giving me directions. I loved it.
He was finally ready to cum, and I assumed he wanted me to swallow, but he had something else in mind.
"Can I cum on your face?" he asked me, holding his big, thick cock in his right hand.
"Yes", I purred. And he did. His back arched, my mouth on the tip and masturbating himself, he started to squirt all over my face. I licked what was on and around my mouth and drank up. He tasted delicious.
We were both smiling now, and I got up from my knees, walked a few shorts steps to the bathroom and grabbed us a towel. I wiped off my face, and gave it to him, and I told him that was the first time anyone's ever done that to me. He was incredulous! I said it was true! And it was!!! Not even my husband of 23 years. NO ONE has ever cum on my face before. I wasn't sure I would like it.
I DID. I LOVED IT.
And so did he.
We sat there together for a few minutes, and I knew he was probably now worried about the time, so I looked at my phone and we had 7 minutes to spare!! hehehe He giggled and began to get dressed. He saw my dress on the floor and handed it to me with a cute giggle.
He realized that he was ready for more. He wanted more than just oral sex, and said, "I want to fuck you so bad now. What are you doing tomorrow?" hehehe I said I was going out of town. He said, "NO! SERIOUSLY???? WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK???", exasperated at the thought of waiting. I said I'd let him know when I got back. He sighed, disappointed. I was happy inside, and was smiling.
The alarm finally went off, and we were both dressed at this point just chatting, I don't remember about what. He was so relaxed and seemed to feel so comfortable around me, it was really really nice. I thought, "I have replaced F", and thought, "Anna, you are falling for this one aren't you??"
We walked downstairs, and at the door to say our goodbyes when I leaned over to kiss him and he reached out to shake my hand!!! It was so awkward and hilarious, I was thinking, "I'm not a prostitute! WTF???" and meekly shook it back. I think I did kiss him anyways, and we said our goodbyes.
He's texted me a few times and sent a few snapchats but hasn't suggested getting together, but it's ok. I've got oh, five or six possible new guys I'm chatting with. Anna doesn't sit around and wait for any guy.
But I would definitely say "Freckles" has moved up the list and is my #2 choice right now.
F will always be #1.
Monday, June 22, 2015
Strip club fun
With Father's Day coming up last weekend, I wanted to get my husband something REALLY special. He's a great cook and has been wanting a stainless steel cooking set, and I was all ready to buy one for him when I was like, "yikes they're almost $200" and I walked out of the store with a better idea!!!
TAKE HIM TO THE STRIP CLUB!!!
It was around 7:30 pm, I'd just gotten off work, and I furiously started texting our sexy group of friends to join us. Within minutes, I had a group of 9 of us all meeting at 11:30.
Woo hoo!!!!!
So we went to dinner first, just hubby and I, and had a simply delectable dinner at our fav restaurant and finished off a bottle of wine. We drove the half hour or so drive to the club, and it was PACKED!!! Now, the only other time we'd been to this strip club was around 3 years ago with my former boss and former co-workers. We had paid for a private lap dance from this super hot Russian girl and I had discovered one of my co-workers is quite into boobies (we are still friends and she has 3 kids now with her boyfriend).
I kept giggling while hubby and I were having dinner as my phone was blowing up with texts from our sexy friends. I hadn't yet told him what our plans were and he was going crazy not knowing what I was up to!!! When I finally told him he was SO excited!! He laughed when I told him, "I was going to buy you pots and pans but thought this would be more fun, and cost about the same!!!" hehehehehe
So we got there and got in free (the bouncer told us about a password we could use) so that was cool! The place was thumping so hard you could feel the pounding in your stomach. It was dark and lights flashing and more skin than you could imagine. We pulled together two tables and a bunch of chairs and the cocktail server came right over. The stage is in a sort of large horseshoe with the tables in the center and around it, as well as chairs lined up right up against the stage. So we sat back a little ways over to the right, with one pole just to our right.
OH. MY. GOD.
I looked to see who was onstage and it was a "little person". She was quite a performer. She was topless and doing handstands and shaking her infant-sized ass in men's faces. I couldn't believe it. I'd never seen anything so disturbing in my life. I'm sorry, I don't judge and I thought she was amazingly so confident with her body it was impressive but yikes there was just something about her small stature that reminded me of a toddler and that was disturbing.
And she was apparently the star of the show. She was the only girl that got the whole stage to herself; BOTH sides of the horseshoe. And we saw a well-dressed gentleman with a stack of money just tossing them at her one at a time as if he were a bank teller counting a large stack. I've never seen anyone do that before, it was incredible. And when she was done with her march back and forth and after her pole dancing (which was phenomenal) she left the stage and some hired guy with a small black bucket crouched back and forth picking up all her cash. It was unbelievable. I just couldn't see her as sexy no matter what; maybe it's cuz I've got children and she just looked like a 4 year old to me I just couldn't really look at her without feeling icky.
Finally the parade of half-naked women began. There must've been 20 scantily clad girls in their early 20's (if not late teens) and they were all such an interesting bunch. I think all women should go to strip clubs and if there are any women out there that feel insecure if their man looks at another woman they just fucking need to get over it!!! I love how I don't have an insecure bone in my body at these places. Which isn't to say I have no insecure bones because I have quite a few but not at a strip club!!!
There were all sizes of women. I had no idea, really, how different we women all are. No wonder men can't get enough of us!!! There were black women with big boobs and big booties. Asian women with tiny breasts and tiny bodies and that long, gorgeous, jet-black hair. There were lots of tattoos and piercings, some with breasts so small they were basically just protruding nipples. There were women with Beyonce-waists, so tiny yet their asses as huge as Nikki Minaj's. I saw breasts so large I wanted to bury my face in them, and I saw breasts that were obviously fake but most were just natural in all their saggy naturalness. Yes, saggy, and these girls were more than 20 years younger than me.
And more than a few had a few extra pounds on themselves. And they were still sexy.
So we watched the parade, and it was fun. The music was thumping hard and it was so loud we had to scream to talk to each other. My three 40+ friends were clearly hotter than any of the girls on stage, and I started to really wonder about the young guys sitting alongside the stage. You know, the ones with the dollar bills getting their faces squished into the dancer's boobies??
My friends and I are just about the horniest women I know, and we are all there BECAUSE WE ARE HORNY BITCHES. And these guys are ignoring us, and paying attention to the dancers. I get it, they're up there performing and half-naked. BUT THERE'S NOT A CHANCE IN HELL ANY OF THEM WILL GO HOME WITH YOU. WE MIGHT.
Soooooo....I'm just watching them getting their rocks off, the dancers gyrating their pussies just out of the guys' reach, smashing their boobs in their faces, and the guys just throwing money at them. Good for them!! That's what you do at a strip club!! BUT HEY!!! THERE ARE HOTTER CHICKS SITTING BEHIND YOU GETTING WET TOO AND HOPING FOR A GOOD LAY TONIGHT DUDES.
So we were all deciding which girl we all liked the best and we all liked different girls. My one friend was into this totally skinny rocker-type platinum blonde girl with a jagged pixie hair cut. My other friend liked a curvier girl with longish brown hair, and the other couldnt' make up her mind. At this point, the parade of girls started to come towards us; the girls choosing girls and boys they liked and pairing off with them. One by one, my friends paired off with the girls they liked and disappeared. My hubby and I and my friends' hubby were left sitting there like forgotten Valentines.
I didn't come there to just sit and let everyone else have more fun than me!!!
I had stopped at an ATM and had $300 burning a hole in my wallet. I swivelled my chair around and saw several dancers that were just standing there unattached, waiting for someone to pair up with. One was just a ways behind us and she was adorable. I jumped up and went over to her and said hi and asked her if my hubby and I could have a private dance with her together? In a very girlish, high-pitched cute voice she responded, "SURE!" and I motioned for my hubby to come over. I grabbed him by the hand and led him over to her.
We followed her across the place, and she'd turn her head and chat to us, very animated and sweet. She was gorgeous. She looked barely 20. Very curvy body, totally different body-type than me. Long blonde hair and tiny boobs. She was dressed in a white bikini that had a very pretty gold chain linking the top to the bottom down her back.
She stopped at the bar and told us she wanted to do a shot first, called a "Payday" hahahaha and so she motioned for the bartender to come over and he made us two. I told her I was the DD so we decided we'd share one. Hubby drank his and she sipped first and I finished her shot. It was deeeeeee-licious!!!I could've had several but made sure I didn't hahaha
Then she led us to a table where she had to check in with some guy first, and we had to pay $20. I guess it's to make sure she gets paid SOMETHING cuz once people get horny I guess they can become assholes hahaha I dont' know!
My girlfriends had told me how it worked since apparently, they'd been to this club before. $40 gets you a simple lap dance. $80 gets you a little more, and for $300 they take you to the opposite side of the club from where we were at and anything goes. My hubby has always said he can't get turned on paying someone to pay attention to him, so he wasn't interested in that. He likes watching me with women so that's what I wanted to give him for Father's Day!!!!
So she led us into this dark room that looked a lot like restaurant booths with the tables taken out. My hubby and I sat down next to each other and she proceeded to talk to us about how she was from Iowa, her name was "Chelsea" (probably not her real name) while she grinded her pussy onto mine. It was hot and fun!!! She'd turn around and shake her booty in my face then lower herself onto me. I asked her if I could touch her and she said, 'YES CUZ YOU'RE A GIRL!!" so that turned my hubby on quick. She gave him some attention too of course, grinding her pussy backwards onto him and he loved it. She'd shake those tiny titties in his face and I saw him smiling. It was hot.
I didn't want to be disrespectful so the only place I would touch her would be her back and the outside of her thighs. I didn't want to be grabby and gross. I assumed if she wanted me to touch her elsewhere she'd grab my hand and put it there but she didn't.
She was soft and smelled soooo good. I loved her long hair swishing on me. It reminded me of Jordan and his long hair. I thought, "I could like girls. I should pursue this!" and soon we were done. My hubby and I were horny bastards at this point and soon after left. We couldn't keep our hands off each other and fucked each other like crazy when we got home.
It was awesome.
TAKE HIM TO THE STRIP CLUB!!!
It was around 7:30 pm, I'd just gotten off work, and I furiously started texting our sexy group of friends to join us. Within minutes, I had a group of 9 of us all meeting at 11:30.
Woo hoo!!!!!
So we went to dinner first, just hubby and I, and had a simply delectable dinner at our fav restaurant and finished off a bottle of wine. We drove the half hour or so drive to the club, and it was PACKED!!! Now, the only other time we'd been to this strip club was around 3 years ago with my former boss and former co-workers. We had paid for a private lap dance from this super hot Russian girl and I had discovered one of my co-workers is quite into boobies (we are still friends and she has 3 kids now with her boyfriend).
I kept giggling while hubby and I were having dinner as my phone was blowing up with texts from our sexy friends. I hadn't yet told him what our plans were and he was going crazy not knowing what I was up to!!! When I finally told him he was SO excited!! He laughed when I told him, "I was going to buy you pots and pans but thought this would be more fun, and cost about the same!!!" hehehehehe
So we got there and got in free (the bouncer told us about a password we could use) so that was cool! The place was thumping so hard you could feel the pounding in your stomach. It was dark and lights flashing and more skin than you could imagine. We pulled together two tables and a bunch of chairs and the cocktail server came right over. The stage is in a sort of large horseshoe with the tables in the center and around it, as well as chairs lined up right up against the stage. So we sat back a little ways over to the right, with one pole just to our right.
OH. MY. GOD.
I looked to see who was onstage and it was a "little person". She was quite a performer. She was topless and doing handstands and shaking her infant-sized ass in men's faces. I couldn't believe it. I'd never seen anything so disturbing in my life. I'm sorry, I don't judge and I thought she was amazingly so confident with her body it was impressive but yikes there was just something about her small stature that reminded me of a toddler and that was disturbing.
And she was apparently the star of the show. She was the only girl that got the whole stage to herself; BOTH sides of the horseshoe. And we saw a well-dressed gentleman with a stack of money just tossing them at her one at a time as if he were a bank teller counting a large stack. I've never seen anyone do that before, it was incredible. And when she was done with her march back and forth and after her pole dancing (which was phenomenal) she left the stage and some hired guy with a small black bucket crouched back and forth picking up all her cash. It was unbelievable. I just couldn't see her as sexy no matter what; maybe it's cuz I've got children and she just looked like a 4 year old to me I just couldn't really look at her without feeling icky.
Finally the parade of half-naked women began. There must've been 20 scantily clad girls in their early 20's (if not late teens) and they were all such an interesting bunch. I think all women should go to strip clubs and if there are any women out there that feel insecure if their man looks at another woman they just fucking need to get over it!!! I love how I don't have an insecure bone in my body at these places. Which isn't to say I have no insecure bones because I have quite a few but not at a strip club!!!
There were all sizes of women. I had no idea, really, how different we women all are. No wonder men can't get enough of us!!! There were black women with big boobs and big booties. Asian women with tiny breasts and tiny bodies and that long, gorgeous, jet-black hair. There were lots of tattoos and piercings, some with breasts so small they were basically just protruding nipples. There were women with Beyonce-waists, so tiny yet their asses as huge as Nikki Minaj's. I saw breasts so large I wanted to bury my face in them, and I saw breasts that were obviously fake but most were just natural in all their saggy naturalness. Yes, saggy, and these girls were more than 20 years younger than me.
And more than a few had a few extra pounds on themselves. And they were still sexy.
So we watched the parade, and it was fun. The music was thumping hard and it was so loud we had to scream to talk to each other. My three 40+ friends were clearly hotter than any of the girls on stage, and I started to really wonder about the young guys sitting alongside the stage. You know, the ones with the dollar bills getting their faces squished into the dancer's boobies??
My friends and I are just about the horniest women I know, and we are all there BECAUSE WE ARE HORNY BITCHES. And these guys are ignoring us, and paying attention to the dancers. I get it, they're up there performing and half-naked. BUT THERE'S NOT A CHANCE IN HELL ANY OF THEM WILL GO HOME WITH YOU. WE MIGHT.
Soooooo....I'm just watching them getting their rocks off, the dancers gyrating their pussies just out of the guys' reach, smashing their boobs in their faces, and the guys just throwing money at them. Good for them!! That's what you do at a strip club!! BUT HEY!!! THERE ARE HOTTER CHICKS SITTING BEHIND YOU GETTING WET TOO AND HOPING FOR A GOOD LAY TONIGHT DUDES.
So we were all deciding which girl we all liked the best and we all liked different girls. My one friend was into this totally skinny rocker-type platinum blonde girl with a jagged pixie hair cut. My other friend liked a curvier girl with longish brown hair, and the other couldnt' make up her mind. At this point, the parade of girls started to come towards us; the girls choosing girls and boys they liked and pairing off with them. One by one, my friends paired off with the girls they liked and disappeared. My hubby and I and my friends' hubby were left sitting there like forgotten Valentines.
I didn't come there to just sit and let everyone else have more fun than me!!!
I had stopped at an ATM and had $300 burning a hole in my wallet. I swivelled my chair around and saw several dancers that were just standing there unattached, waiting for someone to pair up with. One was just a ways behind us and she was adorable. I jumped up and went over to her and said hi and asked her if my hubby and I could have a private dance with her together? In a very girlish, high-pitched cute voice she responded, "SURE!" and I motioned for my hubby to come over. I grabbed him by the hand and led him over to her.
We followed her across the place, and she'd turn her head and chat to us, very animated and sweet. She was gorgeous. She looked barely 20. Very curvy body, totally different body-type than me. Long blonde hair and tiny boobs. She was dressed in a white bikini that had a very pretty gold chain linking the top to the bottom down her back.
She stopped at the bar and told us she wanted to do a shot first, called a "Payday" hahahaha and so she motioned for the bartender to come over and he made us two. I told her I was the DD so we decided we'd share one. Hubby drank his and she sipped first and I finished her shot. It was deeeeeee-licious!!!I could've had several but made sure I didn't hahaha
Then she led us to a table where she had to check in with some guy first, and we had to pay $20. I guess it's to make sure she gets paid SOMETHING cuz once people get horny I guess they can become assholes hahaha I dont' know!
My girlfriends had told me how it worked since apparently, they'd been to this club before. $40 gets you a simple lap dance. $80 gets you a little more, and for $300 they take you to the opposite side of the club from where we were at and anything goes. My hubby has always said he can't get turned on paying someone to pay attention to him, so he wasn't interested in that. He likes watching me with women so that's what I wanted to give him for Father's Day!!!!
So she led us into this dark room that looked a lot like restaurant booths with the tables taken out. My hubby and I sat down next to each other and she proceeded to talk to us about how she was from Iowa, her name was "Chelsea" (probably not her real name) while she grinded her pussy onto mine. It was hot and fun!!! She'd turn around and shake her booty in my face then lower herself onto me. I asked her if I could touch her and she said, 'YES CUZ YOU'RE A GIRL!!" so that turned my hubby on quick. She gave him some attention too of course, grinding her pussy backwards onto him and he loved it. She'd shake those tiny titties in his face and I saw him smiling. It was hot.
I didn't want to be disrespectful so the only place I would touch her would be her back and the outside of her thighs. I didn't want to be grabby and gross. I assumed if she wanted me to touch her elsewhere she'd grab my hand and put it there but she didn't.
She was soft and smelled soooo good. I loved her long hair swishing on me. It reminded me of Jordan and his long hair. I thought, "I could like girls. I should pursue this!" and soon we were done. My hubby and I were horny bastards at this point and soon after left. We couldn't keep our hands off each other and fucked each other like crazy when we got home.
It was awesome.
Monday, June 1, 2015
Jordan's midnight visit
Well hello dear sexy readers! Sorry you haven't heard from me in a couple weeks. I had a bad cold and lost my voice so no podcasting recording. I missed day of work too, and had to put my beautiful cat down (he was 13, lived a good life) so had a pretty shitty week. The weather has been mostly shitty too, which was good hahaha so I didn't feel I was missing out on anything!
I haven't had any juicy stories to tell--I know you didn't get to hear about Jordan's last visit so I will share that with you today. It's weird, it's like, now that he's been here 3 times, I'm feeling a little protective and weird sharing too much. It's like he's gone beyond just being a FWB and is more of a friend now, but it's ok if I write about him cuz he doesn't know I'm writing about him LOL and knowing him he's be pleased if he knew. (his ego is even bigger than mine).
My hubby was out of town and gave me permission to have my sexy lover come see me. He lives over an hour away, and said he loves the drive to my house. He said his dick gets hard the minute he gets in the shower knowing he's coming over, and it's hard the whole drive here (hehehee love it!!!)
Because it was cold out, I had him come through the garage. It was pitch black and I couldn't really see him LOL so I opened the blinds by the side door. OH!! I forgot to mention, it was around midnight. He had to work so he came after.
We were giggling as I pulled the drawstring on the blinds open to let in light from the outdoor bulb. I could see his happy face and big grin! We grabbed each other and pulled each other thisclose and started making out. Damn that guy is fucking sexy. He's got over 2000 followers on his Instagram, mostly female groupies that would give anything to be the girl standing in this garage making out with him, but he chooses ME!!!!! I still can't believe it. Every time he shows up I'm flabbergasted.
I finally led him by the hand into the house, and he took off his shoes by the doorway. Holding his hand, we chatted as we went upstairs to my bedroom. Once there, we just stripped down to nothing and went at it. We were like hungry wolves for each other.
I always take down his "man bun". His hair is down to his waist, and it's so soft and sexy. He is so fucking sexy. I honestly can't get enough of him. He's so small, and so am I, and we fit so well together. One thing I like about him is he loves to go down on me!!!! Fuck so many of these young guys either don't like it or don't know what to do down there or don't stay down there long enough. I tell you, my hubby should give most of these guys lessons!!! (oooo wouldn't THAT be fun???!!!) Jordan is the exception. I would love to get a pic of his face buried in my pussy. I take a handful of his hair and tease my nipples with it while he licks me. I can't help but giggle while I'm doing it, I feel like I've died and gone to heaven.
I love the way Jordan purred to me, "I don't "have sex" hon. I "make love". Mmmmmmm yummy. I love his small waist and his big dick. I love slurping it and licking his balls (completely manscaped, thank you Jordan!!!) and he is able to not-come so quickly it's over before it starts. He really is a great lover. I love going down on him; he's sooo appreciative. He grabs a hold of my hair as well and pulls on it just-so-tightly.
When I finally climbed on top of him, I could tell he wanted to get rough. He had one hand on my throat and it was so exciting. He held back though, but next time I'd love it to get rougher. I want to be black and blue! He just loves fucking me. We flipped each other over so many times and so many different positions, but what I love the most is realizing he never doggy-styles me. And I never really thought about it much till days after; I saw something online about how doggy-style is really so impersonal. No face-to-face with it. And interesting we've never done it that way! Which means....he likes being able to see my face!!! (yay!!!!) I love being on top, and he's so small I can put my whole arm around his waist and pull him close while I fuck him. God I'm getting so turned on writing this!!!!
Finally he was on top, and I will never get that image out of my head (and hope to God I never do!!!) He had one hand on my hip, pulling me as close to him as he could, and the other on my throat. His beautiful, waterfall-blonde hair draped to one side and tickling my right breast, his head back in ecstasy. HOLY FUCK THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS SEX GOD IN MY BED!!! I OWE YOU BIG TIME!!!! And we never use a condom. And we are both clean. Yay!!!
And here's the best part dear readers (if you're still reading this far, bless you!) HE SPENT THE NIGHT. No other guy has ever spent the night with me. And we've had an open marriage for 13 years or so. It's always a quickie, an hour or more here and there, but never overnight.
I SO wanted to have sex again with him in the morning, and a couple times I gently stroked his arm, his back, to see if he'd respond. He seemed totally sound asleep. It was soooo weird seeing another man in my husband's spot. I stared at him, just stared. I really couldn't believe he was still there. It felt good and strange all at the same time. It's really true how being with someone else is so enjoyable, but then I just miss my hubby so damned much. I felt ready to swap him out. LOL
So we didn't have sex, he didn't seem interested, but I had to rush him out. My daughter was home and I had to get her up and out for school. I couldn't let her accidentally see him, so by the time I got him awakened, there was no time. If I could've hidden his car (or thought ahead to move it down the street!) he could've stayed. I did have to work at 9 so there wouldn't have been much time, but I would've been late just to get one more fuck from him.
As he got dressed, again, I'm just staring at his smoking hot body. As he pulled his black skinny jeans on, I asked him, "what size are you?" he said, "Zero." YEAH. ZERO FOLKS. My skinny rocker boy. I drooled watching him dress and put that glorious hair back in a rubberband.
I put on the sexy bra and panties I'd worn for him the night before back on, and had brushed my teeth before I woke him. We walked downstairs together; it was 6:15 am. He was sleepy and sexy. At the door we hugged and kissed and said our goodbyes. It's always bittersweet when a lover leaves; I think, "that was so awesome. And I'll never see him again." And when I do it's even sweeter.
And I dreamed that night that he got me pregnant. Oh maybe it's wishful thinking, cuz I know he's got a kid and wants another. And his baby mommy is such a bitch and I'd be the opposite. I told him about my dream via text and he didn't respond. :( sad face
LOL I probably scared him.
The amazing thing about seeing him again was, the last time we were together was October! He'd been seeing someone seriously, and that's why we hadn't seen each other. She'd dumped him, and he told me all about it. He was really devastated. He wants a relationship SO badly. I told him all about "F" and we commiserated with each other. I feel like we're becoming really good friends. And I love that I have no jealousies, in fact I EXPECT never to see him again every time after we are together. It's truly wonderful.
Yum.
I haven't had any juicy stories to tell--I know you didn't get to hear about Jordan's last visit so I will share that with you today. It's weird, it's like, now that he's been here 3 times, I'm feeling a little protective and weird sharing too much. It's like he's gone beyond just being a FWB and is more of a friend now, but it's ok if I write about him cuz he doesn't know I'm writing about him LOL and knowing him he's be pleased if he knew. (his ego is even bigger than mine).
My hubby was out of town and gave me permission to have my sexy lover come see me. He lives over an hour away, and said he loves the drive to my house. He said his dick gets hard the minute he gets in the shower knowing he's coming over, and it's hard the whole drive here (hehehee love it!!!)
Because it was cold out, I had him come through the garage. It was pitch black and I couldn't really see him LOL so I opened the blinds by the side door. OH!! I forgot to mention, it was around midnight. He had to work so he came after.
We were giggling as I pulled the drawstring on the blinds open to let in light from the outdoor bulb. I could see his happy face and big grin! We grabbed each other and pulled each other thisclose and started making out. Damn that guy is fucking sexy. He's got over 2000 followers on his Instagram, mostly female groupies that would give anything to be the girl standing in this garage making out with him, but he chooses ME!!!!! I still can't believe it. Every time he shows up I'm flabbergasted.
I finally led him by the hand into the house, and he took off his shoes by the doorway. Holding his hand, we chatted as we went upstairs to my bedroom. Once there, we just stripped down to nothing and went at it. We were like hungry wolves for each other.
I always take down his "man bun". His hair is down to his waist, and it's so soft and sexy. He is so fucking sexy. I honestly can't get enough of him. He's so small, and so am I, and we fit so well together. One thing I like about him is he loves to go down on me!!!! Fuck so many of these young guys either don't like it or don't know what to do down there or don't stay down there long enough. I tell you, my hubby should give most of these guys lessons!!! (oooo wouldn't THAT be fun???!!!) Jordan is the exception. I would love to get a pic of his face buried in my pussy. I take a handful of his hair and tease my nipples with it while he licks me. I can't help but giggle while I'm doing it, I feel like I've died and gone to heaven.
I love the way Jordan purred to me, "I don't "have sex" hon. I "make love". Mmmmmmm yummy. I love his small waist and his big dick. I love slurping it and licking his balls (completely manscaped, thank you Jordan!!!) and he is able to not-come so quickly it's over before it starts. He really is a great lover. I love going down on him; he's sooo appreciative. He grabs a hold of my hair as well and pulls on it just-so-tightly.
When I finally climbed on top of him, I could tell he wanted to get rough. He had one hand on my throat and it was so exciting. He held back though, but next time I'd love it to get rougher. I want to be black and blue! He just loves fucking me. We flipped each other over so many times and so many different positions, but what I love the most is realizing he never doggy-styles me. And I never really thought about it much till days after; I saw something online about how doggy-style is really so impersonal. No face-to-face with it. And interesting we've never done it that way! Which means....he likes being able to see my face!!! (yay!!!!) I love being on top, and he's so small I can put my whole arm around his waist and pull him close while I fuck him. God I'm getting so turned on writing this!!!!
Finally he was on top, and I will never get that image out of my head (and hope to God I never do!!!) He had one hand on my hip, pulling me as close to him as he could, and the other on my throat. His beautiful, waterfall-blonde hair draped to one side and tickling my right breast, his head back in ecstasy. HOLY FUCK THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS SEX GOD IN MY BED!!! I OWE YOU BIG TIME!!!! And we never use a condom. And we are both clean. Yay!!!
And here's the best part dear readers (if you're still reading this far, bless you!) HE SPENT THE NIGHT. No other guy has ever spent the night with me. And we've had an open marriage for 13 years or so. It's always a quickie, an hour or more here and there, but never overnight.
I SO wanted to have sex again with him in the morning, and a couple times I gently stroked his arm, his back, to see if he'd respond. He seemed totally sound asleep. It was soooo weird seeing another man in my husband's spot. I stared at him, just stared. I really couldn't believe he was still there. It felt good and strange all at the same time. It's really true how being with someone else is so enjoyable, but then I just miss my hubby so damned much. I felt ready to swap him out. LOL
So we didn't have sex, he didn't seem interested, but I had to rush him out. My daughter was home and I had to get her up and out for school. I couldn't let her accidentally see him, so by the time I got him awakened, there was no time. If I could've hidden his car (or thought ahead to move it down the street!) he could've stayed. I did have to work at 9 so there wouldn't have been much time, but I would've been late just to get one more fuck from him.
As he got dressed, again, I'm just staring at his smoking hot body. As he pulled his black skinny jeans on, I asked him, "what size are you?" he said, "Zero." YEAH. ZERO FOLKS. My skinny rocker boy. I drooled watching him dress and put that glorious hair back in a rubberband.
I put on the sexy bra and panties I'd worn for him the night before back on, and had brushed my teeth before I woke him. We walked downstairs together; it was 6:15 am. He was sleepy and sexy. At the door we hugged and kissed and said our goodbyes. It's always bittersweet when a lover leaves; I think, "that was so awesome. And I'll never see him again." And when I do it's even sweeter.
And I dreamed that night that he got me pregnant. Oh maybe it's wishful thinking, cuz I know he's got a kid and wants another. And his baby mommy is such a bitch and I'd be the opposite. I told him about my dream via text and he didn't respond. :( sad face
LOL I probably scared him.
The amazing thing about seeing him again was, the last time we were together was October! He'd been seeing someone seriously, and that's why we hadn't seen each other. She'd dumped him, and he told me all about it. He was really devastated. He wants a relationship SO badly. I told him all about "F" and we commiserated with each other. I feel like we're becoming really good friends. And I love that I have no jealousies, in fact I EXPECT never to see him again every time after we are together. It's truly wonderful.
Yum.
Monday, April 27, 2015
Creepy Catfisher Strikes Again
After I wrote that last blog post, I sat and thought about the whole thing, and I thought, "This innocent guy, the model Joshua, needs to know this creep has stolen his identity." So I looked at all the Google results, and found his Facebook. So I private messaged him and told him the whole story. He was so sweet!! He wrote me right back, gushingly thanked me for letting him know. We chatted back and forth off and on all day the next day, and he was just mortified. He said that it was "definitely NOT" him in the OKCupid profile. And I finished by saying, "BTW it was disappointing to say the least because you're really hot and I'd love to meet you!" LOL He lives in England so unless I jump on a plane that's not going to happen unfortunately! I gave him the link to this blog with the story I wrote and he read the whole thing and told me how sickening it was that there was someone out there that would do such a thing. I totally agreed.
I felt really good afterwards. I felt like I had done this cute, innocent guy a good thing. I know these disgusting creeps never get caught, but at least Joshua can keep himself aware that if he did it once, he'll do it again, and he needs to be able to protect himself. I felt really bad for him. I mean, I've watched the TV show "Catfish" and have felt really badly for the people that get catfished but I've never seen it from the perspective of the person who's picture gets stolen. This was so frightening.
I thought that was the end of the creepy guy catfishing me. I had done everything I thought I could do.
WRONG.
So yesterday I'm driving, and I get a text from someone who says, "Hi gorgeous." There are no previous texts from this person, so it's someone I've communicated in the past and are no longer interested in. I responded, "who is this?" and he wrote back, 'Ryan". Now, there's only 1 Ryan that I know, and he is my current hottie I've been Snapchatting all the time. He's super cute, 19, and has been in Alabama for work for a month. We've been getting to know each other and have been hoping to get together when he gets back. And he had just gotten back.
I was driving to the airport to pick up my husband and I was paying attention to my GPS more than my phone. But I REALLY like this Ryan guy so I wanted to respond. He asked for a pic. I snapped a pic of my legs--I was driving and in a dress and thought he'd like that. Then he called me. I didn't answer because I needed to pay attention to my GPS. I had never been to this airport before and there was a lot of traffic.
He didn't leave a message but kept texting me. Suddenly, my radar went up that it wasn't him. I don't know what it was, but there it was. I went to my Snapchat and wrote Ryan. I asked him if he was texting me and calling me. I was too distracted to scroll through my phone and see if he and I had actually texted, and did I even have Ryan's phone number?
Ryan said, "No, it's not me. My phone number is (a completely different area code as well)."
I felt a stabbing pain in my heart. I wrote the creep, pretending to be interested, "Send me a pic so I know who I'm talking to." And you'll never believe what pic he sent!!! THE SAME FUCKING PROFILE PIC OF JOSHUA!!!!!
I verbally texted, "LEAVE ME ALONE AND DO NOT EVER CONTACT ME AGAIN YOURE A FUCKING CREEP". He actually had the nerve to write, "Ok bitch." Can you believe it??? Soon as I stopped driving I blocked his phone number.
I wrote Joshua and let him know clearly this asshole isn't about to stop using Joshua's pic to lure women.
Fucking scary motherfucker.
I felt really good afterwards. I felt like I had done this cute, innocent guy a good thing. I know these disgusting creeps never get caught, but at least Joshua can keep himself aware that if he did it once, he'll do it again, and he needs to be able to protect himself. I felt really bad for him. I mean, I've watched the TV show "Catfish" and have felt really badly for the people that get catfished but I've never seen it from the perspective of the person who's picture gets stolen. This was so frightening.
I thought that was the end of the creepy guy catfishing me. I had done everything I thought I could do.
WRONG.
So yesterday I'm driving, and I get a text from someone who says, "Hi gorgeous." There are no previous texts from this person, so it's someone I've communicated in the past and are no longer interested in. I responded, "who is this?" and he wrote back, 'Ryan". Now, there's only 1 Ryan that I know, and he is my current hottie I've been Snapchatting all the time. He's super cute, 19, and has been in Alabama for work for a month. We've been getting to know each other and have been hoping to get together when he gets back. And he had just gotten back.
I was driving to the airport to pick up my husband and I was paying attention to my GPS more than my phone. But I REALLY like this Ryan guy so I wanted to respond. He asked for a pic. I snapped a pic of my legs--I was driving and in a dress and thought he'd like that. Then he called me. I didn't answer because I needed to pay attention to my GPS. I had never been to this airport before and there was a lot of traffic.
He didn't leave a message but kept texting me. Suddenly, my radar went up that it wasn't him. I don't know what it was, but there it was. I went to my Snapchat and wrote Ryan. I asked him if he was texting me and calling me. I was too distracted to scroll through my phone and see if he and I had actually texted, and did I even have Ryan's phone number?
Ryan said, "No, it's not me. My phone number is (a completely different area code as well)."
I felt a stabbing pain in my heart. I wrote the creep, pretending to be interested, "Send me a pic so I know who I'm talking to." And you'll never believe what pic he sent!!! THE SAME FUCKING PROFILE PIC OF JOSHUA!!!!!
I verbally texted, "LEAVE ME ALONE AND DO NOT EVER CONTACT ME AGAIN YOURE A FUCKING CREEP". He actually had the nerve to write, "Ok bitch." Can you believe it??? Soon as I stopped driving I blocked his phone number.
I wrote Joshua and let him know clearly this asshole isn't about to stop using Joshua's pic to lure women.
Fucking scary motherfucker.
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