My new guy is a masochist--HELP!

I need some advice from my dear readers! J (previously nicknamed "Jay" but I've changed it since someone wrote me worried it was their husband!!!! My J is divorced with no kids so no, he's not your husband BUT from here on out I will address him as simply "J") and I have had some serious sexting going on and frankly, as attracted to him as I am, I'm getting some scary vibes. I don't know if it's naive me or actual "hey, pay attention girl" kind of vibes so I'm tossing this out there for some advice. I think I'm out of my league here.

I have known since we met that he's a "sub". I think I kinda knew what that meant (generally speaking) but this guys seems to have more experience in this area than I'm probably comfortable with. But--I'm still intrigued and can't wait to get naked with him. However--I've just had some thoughts that I want to share with you and see if I'm reading things clearly.

First of all, it occurred to me yesterday that when I meet someone new that I'm sexually interested in, usually the conversation quickly goes quite graphic in descriptions of what we want to do to one another, such as, "I can't wait to push my breasts in your face and have you suck my nipples" and "I can't wait to shove my dick in your wet pussy and release my load." Shit like that. Yeah, common stuff. NBD. 

This guy J has NOT talked like this to me yet. He has said a few things about having sex with both hubby and me like, "I want you to sit on my face and suck your husband's cock while I eat you out" and that's nice BUT I wonder if he likes regular sex???

More info needed here.....he talks constantly about being humiliated, and serving us. He begs me, "what do you want to make me do?" and he'll suggest something I hadn't thought of (duh--no experience here) like, "draw your bath and wash your backs." That's nice! OOOOOO I could get into that! But THEN it goes dark. He said, "I get turned on being laughed at. Humiliated. Deprive me of pleasure." WTF Uh oh Miss NaughtyAnna is out of her comfort zone.

But don't get me wrong--I'd like to try it with him. Hubby thinks it sounds titillating. I Googled "masochist" yesterday and I got frightened about the spectrum of things a masochist can and will do. I know that with Mickey we went out of the boundaries of safety a few times and it was very exciting, so I'm not opposed to giving it a try. I just need someone who's into it to give me some advice on how to proceed. I'm too sweet and loving to make fun of someone. We must be mismatched but I am crushing hard on him and want to please him too.

The far end of the spectrum I guess goes into some gross bodily function stuff like being defecated upon. I would throw up. I DO NOT WANT ANY PART OF THAT. I think that's Lady Gaga and her regurgitation performance, did you see that? She calls it "art". I call it "disgusting" and "a complete turnoff."

I am not really a kinky girl, I just like sex with lots of different people!! I don't need to hang from the ceiling or be tied up to enjoy the flesh with another human being. I really like this guy; he's a southern gentleman in every other way. He's very polite and calls and texts me and he's just as sweet as apple pie.

Until, obviously, he's naked.